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GoneForGood
March 19th, 2013, 04:18 PM
I don't know what to do with myself. My stomach is twisting in knots. I have been almost in tears all day. I feel like I'm going to puke. My mom told me she was done with every drug other than marijuana. She told me she would never try heroin again. She was always that mom that never lied about anything. She always said that if a kid is old enough to ask they're old enough for an answer. But she did lie:mad: this morning I woke up and my step mom told me my mom was arrested on Friday. I already knew that and honestly it didn't bother me much because I'm used to it. She's been in and out of jail her whole life. But what I didn't know was what she was in there for. (She has a lot of experience with court and her rights and she's out now.)
Well it turns out she was cooking meth. There was even a picture of it on the news website. She got 4 charges.
Production of meth with 1000 feet of a park
Possession of meth
Possession of marijuana
Possession of paraphernalia
I can't stop thinking that this must have been partly my fault because I haven't been able to see her since before Halloween because of her housing issue. I feel like if I would have been there for her she wouldn't start depending on drugs again. Then again she has never been there for me when I needed her, and I feel like a bitch for even thinking that. But I know it's true.
I thought that the time I wasn't able to see her she was sorting things out and trying to get one of the government-payed houses (she has no job because of health conditions.) But actually she was cooking meth. I haven't talked to her about it but she claims she didn't do anything. Well, there were pictures of it on the news. What have you done to yourself mom?:(

Sorry that was so long. I just needed to get that off my chest. I wasn't mentally stable in the first place and that just tore me apart.
brandon1995
March 19th, 2013, 04:29 PM
SO sorry for what you have gone thru. Unfortunately, lying is part of drug addicion/alcoholism so unless someone is in a program of some kind it's not likely they will tell the truth about their drug use. Is she going somewhere where she can get help?

Whatever her situation is, tho, you are not responsible and in no way is it your fault. Did you know thers 12 step programs for relatives of addicts and alcoholics? It kind of sucks but you will understand the problem better if you try it.
GoneForGood
March 19th, 2013, 08:28 PM
SO sorry for what you have gone thru. Unfortunately, lying is part of drug addicion/alcoholism so unless someone is in a program of some kind it's not likely they will tell the truth about their drug use. Is she going somewhere where she can get help?

Whatever her situation is, tho, you are not responsible and in no way is it your fault. Did you know thers 12 step programs for relatives of addicts and alcoholics? It kind of sucks but you will understand the problem better if you try it.

Thanks for the advice, but I don't think it would be an option for me to go to a 12 step program. program. My dad likes to cover everything up and pretend it's okay. Especially with me because I'm his youngest and his only girl and in his eyes "the most successful with the brightest future." Although I think it would highly benefit me because I have been around addicts my whole life. That seems to be all my parents like to date. But my dad did switch it up a bit this marriage. An alcoholic. Haha :P I know that's not funny but it's just the irony of it all. all But thanks for suggesting the program:)
Synyster Shadows
March 28th, 2013, 07:47 PM
Sorry to hear that. Yesterday, Chris Herren came to my local high school to talk about his life story and struggle with addiction; if you want to know he is, if you don't already, long story short, high school basketball star turns to drugs after partying and wrecks his life a lot, over and over. He struggled for 14 years before finally getting over it. He repeatedly lied to his wife every time he said he was done. He kept going back to those drugs. They kept him feeling good. It took him 14 years. His wife and kids hated him. Everytime your mom says she's done, it's just like Mr. Herren's story. I would advise you to stay away from her. Don't talk to her. She's being a b*tch, lying to you like that. stay away from her as much as possible. Keep your head up; things will get better.