How do you stop things with someone you shouldn't have started with

[Wanderer_]

Lets say you fooled around with a sibling and as much as he wants to go inside you and finish and one day in the shower he managed to get in but stops a moment later when you come to your senses... You know he is going to want to try again... Does everything have to stop? What do u do? How do you not hurt their feelings/upset them?

[Second Chance]

This is a tough situation, and what you describe is the unfortunate side effect of relatives who get intimate with one another. I think the hardest part of your situation is how to tell your sibling no while still letting him know you love him. Everything depends on whether your sibling is older or younger than you. If your brother is younger than you, then let him know that you wanted to give him experience because you cared but that you two cannot do sexual stuff anymore because of the risks. You can let him know that he can always come to you with sexual questions, and you both can do non-sexual stuff that brothers and sisters do. Tell him you want to be close but not like a girlfriend and boyfriend. I would tell him that you are not "dumping" him but just are setting things right.

If your brother is older than you, then I would tell him that sharing your body with him was something you thought would make you two close, but it clearly made things close in a way that is not right. Tell him that you want to be a sister to him and not a lover, and that all because you don't want to be sexual with him doesn't mean you don't like him.

Chances are you two will have a period of withdrawal and may still have strong feelings for each other especially if you both lost your virginity to each other. You both just have to resist temptation and do everything you can not to be alone with one another or be in a position where you two can do sexual stuff. There is a chance your brother might feel really bad, too, and it is going to be hard at first for him and you to move on. However, you both do have to stop doing sexual stuff because it could lead to a lot of big problems.

I would not feel bad about what you have done, and at least you realize that you made a mistake. Mistakes can be fixed, and I am sure that over time you and your brother will eventually become siblings again and not lovers.

[dingo006]

communication. you gotta talk it out. it is better to be as up front as possible. talk about what you want and what you dont want from him and how far he is allowed to go with you. take charge, its your body too! its always best to not let things go too far because you might end up doing something you regret (and doing it over and over again even though it makes you feel guilty). remember, you gotta do whats best for you.

[Wanderer_]

Yeah still complicated but still close and still open with each other which is good
He seems to respect how far I am not prepared to go

But for that 30 seconds I didn't know if that was it - that's how far we go now or if its about to get messy and sad

[CaliforniaMatt]

First of all, be diplomatic
Second of all, if he's older, just talk it out normally! If he's younger, simply explain to him why it's wrong.

[Wanderer_]

He is a year older

[CaliforniaMatt]

Tell him the truth: if his sperm gets you pregnant, you guys are in trouble. The pill doesn't always work, and he needs to understand boundaries. I don't blame him, though. It's just an instinct to want to cum in a girl.

[Wanderer_]

Yeah I know and it's girls instincts to take it

[CaliforniaMatt]

Yeah I know and it's girls instincts to take it

It's funny how things that feel so good can get you in so much trouble. Drugs feel good. Sex feels good. School feels bad. See what I mean?

[Wanderer_]

Lol true that

[Smc711]

Talk to him and say that u just didnt mean for it to go that far and its not his or ur falt. It was just the hormones and that he shoud try and control them. But tell him uk its difficult. The key is not to blame him but still tell him no.

[Wanderer_]

Keep failing at this, don't know if I shouldn't just give up and just go with it for now
It's not like it's unpleasant

[sophiaLockhart]

only you can decide what you really want, but if it's something you know you'll regret then it's best to stop it before it gets any worse

[dingo006]

we all make choices i think and we all choose really what we do with who we do it. (well in a perfect world) and only you can decide your limits.

[NTTHRASH]

This is a tough situation, and what you describe is the unfortunate side effect of relatives who get intimate with one another. I think the hardest part of your situation is how to tell your sibling no while still letting him know you love him. Everything depends on whether your sibling is older or younger than you. If your brother is younger than you, then let him know that you wanted to give him experience because you cared but that you two cannot do sexual stuff anymore because of the risks. You can let him know that he can always come to you with sexual questions, and you both can do non-sexual stuff that brothers and sisters do. Tell him you want to be close but not like a girlfriend and boyfriend. I would tell him that you are not "dumping" him but just are setting things right.

If your brother is older than you, then I would tell him that sharing your body with him was something you thought would make you two close, but it clearly made things close in a way that is not right. Tell him that you want to be a sister to him and not a lover, and that all because you don't want to be sexual with him doesn't mean you don't like him.

Chances are you two will have a period of withdrawal and may still have strong feelings for each other especially if you both lost your virginity to each other. You both just have to resist temptation and do everything you can not to be alone with one another or be in a position where you two can do sexual stuff. There is a chance your brother might feel really bad, too, and it is going to be hard at first for him and you to move on. However, you both do have to stop doing sexual stuff because it could lead to a lot of big problems.

I would not feel bad about what you have done, and at least you realize that you made a mistake. Mistakes can be fixed, and I am sure that over time you and your brother will eventually become siblings again and not lovers.

Yes. I agree with everything in that.

[Wanderer_]

It's just hard and he's so happy now
He was depressed suicidal before
I'm not saying my vagina is the cure for depression but he seems to be in such a better place

[Horatio Nelson]

It might just be lol. It seems apparent that you love each other, but if this is something that really bothers you, then ask to stop. But if it doesn't, then don't. I don't see it harming anyone.

[NickTheBest]

How old are you at first


Let him know i dont think we should do this anymore i have changed and it doesnt feel right with me

[Wanderer_]

How old are you at first


Let him know i dont think we should do this anymore i have changed and it doesnt feel right with me

I'm 15 he is 16

[johnsmith1]

It's so easy to sit and write about the fact that he's your brother and don't do it blah blah blah. But that is easy to say when you're siting down calmly at a computer thinking rationally. If you think that there is a genuine chance that the hormones will kick in again and that things could happen (and that does happen all to often in teens), at least make sure now that you are on the pill. You may have the best of intentions not to, but covering all bases to stop being another pregnant teen is useful

[Wanderer_]

Yep I'd like to think he wouldn't have tried to get in me if he didn't know I was on the pill