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[Fiending_the_freedom]

i feel like every relationship i'm in, no matter how great or how deep the connection is, just keeps going untill i get bored or grow to despise them.

I mean i've only had three seriouse boyfriends, and each of them i deeply felt for, even loved.
but how the other two ended (i'm still with the third one) is all me. the relationship is going fine, they want too see me more, i avoid them if there too clingy, then i break up with them and there so hurt and try to talk to me and beg me that they'll change (when they havnt done anything wrong in the first place).

my boyfriend currently i love so much, and i really dont want this to happen again. but i know it will, i am already starting to feel the same way i did before i got sick of the other two. He makes me smile, and laugh, and he love me a lot ( acually it scares me a little). we've been such good friends for the last 6 months, and we used to hang out everyday. but now that were together, he wants to see me ALL the time, alone, and i love hanging with my firends, i'd go crazy without them, so i find myself arguing with him eveyrdya over him wanting to see me, and i jsut get so frustrated with him.
i'm starting to miss being without him, i mena i'm thinking aobut it all the time, and ifwe ever broke up he'd go crazy.

[MAXD88]

Well if you can't stand to be with him 24/7 then you need to be firm and let him know that you want some space. Clearly this guy has an absolute obsession with you and that's clouding his judgment a little.
Maybe theres a more effective way to get your message through to him. You need to be forceful (but not too forceful or you might hurt his feelings).

[RaisingSand]

I can't stress this enough ... COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION, COMMUNICATION!
It's very important to talk and communicate with the person you're in a relationship with, so they you both know exactly where you're at in it and that both people are feeling happy and content with the ways things are going. You should sit your boyfriend down and say that while you do love and care for him deeply, you do need your space and time alone just as everyone does. :)

[Fiending_the_freedom]

SO i talked to him.
mainly becuase i was forced to because he was mad at me and was being a dick.
He told me how he misses me and how we hardley spend any time together, i mean i see him everyday, just sometimes its only for an hour or two. ANd he told me he felt like i USED HIM. can you belive that? because i came to his house, only stayed for two hours, had sex, ate his food and left because I HAD PLANS to go to my firends house to do hmwk!

he even had the nerve to say "sorry if you dont have enough time in your presiouse life to call me back " because i forogt to becuase i was eating>.>

we made up, i told him i needed space liek every other person, and finally after we talked he sid he felt bad about it and he was sorry. but i really dont think that tlaks going to change anything.

Everytime he's a dick, or whines i start missing my ex more and more. because i keep relizing how good he was for me.

i just dont think brendan understands that i have problems, and i need space when i feel depressed bcuase i dont want him around me when i am, i jsut need space in general to still HAVE A LIFE. to hang with my friends. i still need to be ME.

i guess i have to not just tlak to him but talk about something that works. i ahve to make comprimises jsut liek he does.

[byee]

It's also about expectations. Communication is important, but you have to be clear about your expectations. Talking/communicating doesn't solve much if you're not addressing the real issues. I think in your case, it's about both of your expectations. They don't jive.

Your expectations are that you need some space, that seeing someone means "*fill in the blank*". Then, have him fill in his *blank* about what it means to be seeing you. Then, after you've established these expectations, try to come to a mutual understanding on the ground rules, what you both can reasonably expect here.

[RaisingSand]

If he can't understand that you need your space just like every other person, then that's his loss. Every person needs time to do things they enjoy, by themselves or with their friends, and quite frankly he's being extremely selfish if he can't see why you need to do this.
If you can't make him understand that you feel like he's suffocating you by not letting you go and spend time with your friends, or guilt-tripping you when you leave to do so, then maybe this relationship isn't the best thing for you right now.
Boyfriends will come and go, but real friends will stick by you forever. You need to do what is best for you, and what makes you happiest.
I'm not saying just go and ditch him, I say give him another shot and understanding that time alone is something you need, want and enjoy, and hey, they're your friends, you have to spend time with them as well as him. But seriously, if he can't understand that, then maybe you should take action. I hope it doesn't come to that and I hope you guys can find a happy-medium when you're both getting what you need and you respect each other and understand that you can't be together all the time.
Good luck sweetie. :hug:

[Fiending_the_freedom]

If he can't understand that you need your space just like every other person, then that's his loss. Every person needs time to do things they enjoy, by themselves or with their friends, and quite frankly he's being extremely selfish if he can't see why you need to do this.
If you can't make him understand that you feel like he's suffocating you by not letting you go and spend time with your friends, or guilt-tripping you when you leave to do so, then maybe this relationship isn't the best thing for you right now.
Boyfriends will come and go, but real friends will stick by you forever. You need to do what is best for you, and what makes you happiest.
I'm not saying just go and ditch him, I say give him another shot and understanding that time alone is something you need, want and enjoy, and hey, they're your friends, you have to spend time with them as well as him. But seriously, if he can't understand that, then maybe you should take action. I hope it doesn't come to that and I hope you guys can find a happy-medium when you're both getting what you need and you respect each other and understand that you can't be together all the time.
Good luck sweetie. :hug:

thanks guys, but particuarly you, that haelped a lot, i talked to him, and i told him instead of fight because htis is going to happened again we should think of ways to avoid it. i told him i have no problem spending a whole day with him, but maybe the next day i want to spend all with my friends. and he said he's fine with that.
but i did tell him i cant handle how he freaks out so much so fast over little things, he needs too look at the situation from both perspectives first, he agreed and apoligized i tood him i cant handle him doing that anymore so he needs to change.

i've relized this was his anger and clingyness, and my excuses and fear of being happy that caused us to fight.
i dont want to end it with him, since i've been with him i havnt cut at all, i dont freak out on myself about little things, and i think its because i've relized that it was me all along making myself not happy, not letting myself be happy. but now my life is so much better=]

[ThatCanadianGuy]

It's great how communication can solve almost anything, if everyone gives eachother a chance to listen about their feelings. By the way don't be AFRAID to be happy; you made this relationship work and you DESERVE it no matter how you may feel about yourself. You are a GOOD person, with and understanding boyfriend. Just DON'T let it go to waste, 'cause this relationship obviously MEANS something! I hope for the best for you two! :yeah:

[RaisingSand]

Hey, I'm really glad things worked out for you, that's awesome. :D