Do Friendships naturally drift as we age?

[Steve Jobs]

Hey guys. Just an idea that's sparked up in my mind for the last day or so.
When we're kids, we spend a lot of time together. We do lots of stupid stuff, and environments like school and especially college, force us to mingle with like-minded people a lot of the time.
As we age, we slowly become more reserved and "settled" into routine, having spouses, families, jobs and other things that take more priority in our lives.

Do you think age simply takes a turn with the ways we invest in our friends (crazy shit, school, sleepovers and that type of stuff turning into more formal socializing events, work or sport) or is this something that takes a backseat as we get older?

[tundravortex]

yes because we find people that are more intresting than we never talk,hang out or anything and than your friend ship ends right there

[ImCoolBeans]

yes because we find people that are more intresting than we never talk,hang out or anything and than your friend ship ends right there

I don't really agree with your statement. I think it has more to do with the fact that as time goes on peoples' interests, hobbies, personalties, attitudes, goals and priorities change -- even if only slightly. These changes all effect the threads that bind a friendship and when the two people in the relationship are both changing, so is the relationship itself.

[tundravortex]

I don't really agree with your statement. I think it has more to do with the fact that as time goes on peoples' interests, hobbies, personalties, attitudes, goals and priorities change -- even if only slightly. These changes all effect the threads that bind a friendship and when the two people in the relationship are both changing, so is the relationship itself.

its kinda different where im from but im not going to argue

[PinkFloyd]

I sure hope it doesn't. I mean I have a lot of parties and shit ahead of me that I wont want to end.

[Cicero]

Somewhat. I mean, we all change and its up to us to keep in contact.

[Aggregate]

I agree with a lot of what has been said.

People do change with time, and friendships need room to adapt. A strong friendship can stretch and mold to these changes, but its just as easy to 'drift' apart.

I don't think its uncontrollable. Don't scare yourself with the idea the people you care about will drift away. Rather, you will be drifting as well and the change will happen naturally and you'll probably accept it as the best outcome depending on the situation.

[workingatperfect]

I could be wrong but I think he might mean, so our friendships get less important and less abundant when we get older..

I think it's a bit of both. I do think friends become a smaller part of your life as you accept other responsibilities. I mean, obviously when you've got a job and kids, you're not going to be our with your friends every night or weekend. But the manner of the friendship tends to change also. Like you said, instead of sleepovers and sitting around paying video games, you're more likely to be going to like cookouts and holiday gatherings, or going to people's houses for dinner or watching your kids have play dates. And I think you grow to have less friends and more acquaintances as you age too.

Like, when i was growing up, my parents had two couple that they were really good friends with, and one didn't live here. The one that did, they had two sons a little older than my brother and I. So we would go over there at least once a week and we'd have dinner or go swimming, or they'd just sit around talking while we, the kids, played. This was a guy that my dad knew all through school, so they were quite close. But when they both got jobs and families, they stopped hanging out every day. They were still close, just not high school best friend close.

[Apollo.]

I agree to an extent, since i have turned 18(the drinking age here) I have left behind a group of friends that never went out to clubs and bars to a more social group and I find its a good change. Friends come and go, it's just life the ones that stay become best friends and they are the ones you stay in contact with. On the other hand I know people that are much older than me and still stick with the friends from childhood.

I think friendships taking a back seat as we grow older depends on the individual as well, my parents have definitely sacrificed part of their social life because of having kids and each other, they have friends though that are just as social as I am.

[Leon03]

They do not naturally drift but I think it's getting harder with growing older. You move to different places and have less time on hand to spend with your friends. Thus it's so important to stay in contact actively if you are not around each other for given reasons like school, sport or anything else anymore.
When I was little we moved quite often for my dad's job and there is just one friend left from this time I managed to stay in contact with.
It's too late to regret. But it's definitely a lesson I learned.

[Maverick]

I don't really agree with your statement. I think it has more to do with the fact that as time goes on peoples' interests, hobbies, personalties, attitudes, goals and priorities change -- even if only slightly. These changes all effect the threads that bind a friendship and when the two people in the relationship are both changing, so is the relationship itself.I kind of agree with what he said. While what you said is valid as well, some friendships end up going stale and people begin to reach out to other people that are more interesting / exciting.

[Horizon]

They usually do, because we make friends when we are a certain way. We aren't going to be that same person in 10 years, so in 10 years, we aren't going to be the person that the other made friends with.

[WalkingOnDisaster]

I guess we do. But it's not because our friends aren't important.
I believe as we age we develop more responsibilities, and it makes it harder to hang out with our friends. Even if we care for and love them deeply, we will still grow and need to care for other things, even if our friends mean more to us than anything in this entire universe as kids.
Just my opinion though.