Letting him down??

[Lifesreject]

So there is this guy who really likes me. Infact he likes me so uch he asked me out. Heres the thing though i dont like him. I mean hes really nice as a friend and everything but he is just a friend. He asked me out one and day and i told him in the nicest possible way that i dint want to go out with him, but bless his little face still fell and when he asked me if i would ever consider going out with like ever i reall y dindnt no what to say. I didnt want to hurt his feelings so in the end i just said i didnt no ( a bit limp in no but what else could i say)

Well it turns out he still likes me and is intending to ask me to the prom. I dont want to go to the prom with him even though i dont have a date yet but its just i really dont want to go with him. I dont no how to let him down if he asks me. He was so hurt last time im sure he was pretty much heart broken. I just no how to turn him down politly.

[WriterAnonymous]

You probably should have just given it to him straight before instead of luring him into a false sense of security with the "I don't know" answer; it will probably hurt twice as much once you turn him down again. But you really can't do anything about that now, so the only thing you can do is tell him no.

[Gumleaf]

i think telling him the truth about how you feel is best. although it will cause some short term pain, it will mean everything is out in the open and you can get on with being friends without that baggage.

[byee]

The real issue here is that he doesn't want to take no for an answer.

It's very flattering that he likes you so much, it's very honorable that he was direct with you about his feelings, and it is likewise honorable that you told him pretty clearly that you weren't interested in him 'that way'. It's unfortunate that he cannot accept this, but it's really not your responsibility to take care of him here and 'sugar coat' this. After awhile, it get's a bit annoying that someone doesn't listen to you! His feelings are not more important than yours.

Decent folk always consider the feelings of others, however, so if he does ask you out again, or to the prom, you should be kind, but direct and firm, that you do not like him that way. And maybe consider very gently asking him to not keep asking you this.

It's ok to be firm and direct with people, even if it means that they will not hear what they want. It's an important lesson for them to learn.