turtle guy
February 10th, 2013, 06:00 PM
Ever since 5th grade i have been nothing but depressed. i can not explain why, i can not figure out why. i just am. through middle school i have been alone with no friends, horrible grades, and even the teachers knew i was pathetic and dumb. I wanted to kill myself everday of middle school. but what kept me from doing that is that i wanted to prove them wrong. my parents and teachers say that i would not make it to high school. i proved them wrong. but when i made it to high school, i wished i could have just died instead. freshman year my one and only friend, my best friend left me. after that happend i tried to kill myself. 3 times. the first time i tried, i took 31 pills and a bottle of medicine. it did not work, i was sad it did not. then i tried strangling myself. i could not pass out. Then i tried even more pills. 23. again nothing. 1 year later and a sophmore. pure straights F's...i am the most pathetic person ever. i am not going to pass high school, i have no future i am extremely dumb and have no friends! since nothing worked, i want to try cutting my veins or even a gun to the head, hopefully then i can be more happy :) and maybe i will be more useful dead. no one truly cares, they all say they do. they really do not. even my parents say i am useless and my brother makes it worse. i can not wait to kill myself. no one wants to talk to me, i am a loaner. no friends. no future. i will just kill myself to make more space for people who actually are worth living. i hope i can do it successfully this time...