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View Full Version : Need Help to Sort Myself Out.


MattGuy
February 8th, 2013, 05:47 PM
Right, i joined this forum to get help for what i am about to say, please tell me what i need to do to sort stuff out.

So, i am in my last year of high school and i have a fair few mates. I am not a normal guy, even though i am not gay at all, i am quite emotional when comparing myself to mates, for example i feel love like a girl would and love the idea of getting married just like a girl.

But thats just background info., through out my life I have just been raised by my mum and she has constantly drilled into my head how to treat a girl in the correct manner so that i become a 'gentleman'. However this has kind of messed things up for me, I now have a multiple personality and I will explain why.

When i started high school i wasnt a popular kid, i has around 5 friends and i hated this, so i grew my hair and tried to see how i could be more popular by looking how other popular people behaved and it worked perfectly I now have countless amounts of people i talk to, but this way of acting has become some kind of safety shield when talking to people to hide the real me so now with most people I am seen as a sexual dick head that wants to rape children when i am older and i am a sensitive guy so these comments get to me.

This shield has also changed the person I am so I group girls. There are girls i consider to be sexual and so i cheesily flirt with them which i hate doing but i have no control over doing it as it just comes naturally to me now and there are also girls that i enjoy having normal conversations with however those girls also think im a dick.

So the fake personality that helped me get friends has now become my enemy and stops me from getting any sort of girlfriend as they think i just want them for sex, which i hate, because for me in a relationship I am only ready when the girl is, i am not going to force her to do anything with me.

Basically what i need help with is sorting this mess out, Im not a bad looking guy i've had relationships in the past. I know i wont be able to get rid of this shield because it has in a way, even though i hate to say it, become a part of who i am.

So what i am asking is how can i show people who i really am? I have friends but no real ones i trust to talk to as they will just laugh in my face. Thanks if you read all of that, i did shorten it as much as possible.

ScottishFilipino
February 8th, 2013, 05:54 PM
It may be hard to do because you've been doing it for quite some time. But just try to burst of of your bubble. Try not aiming to look or act just like the popular kids.
Just wait for the right crowd of people to come your way and you'll be fine. I know its hard, because i"ve been through the same thing you're going through.

robertoccm
February 9th, 2013, 10:36 PM
BE yourself in front of EVERYONE, be respectful and avoid flirting to sexual girls, even if this stops you from being popular, you will no longer be seen as a sexual predator

brandon1995
February 9th, 2013, 10:51 PM
BE yourself in front of EVERYONE, be respectful and avoid flirting to sexual girls, even if this stops you from being popular, you will no longer be seen as a sexual predator

the worthwile people will still like you. the other ones who cares?

TopThrill
February 10th, 2013, 01:33 AM
Yeah. Everyone just about got it right. You gotta be honest with everyone, but first you've got to be honest with yourself. Take a mental breather and just reflect on everything. When you've won the private victory, you can win the public victory by being honest with everyone and apologizing to those you've offended or might have hurt. You're not the only person to have ever compromised their own standards for everyone. I congratulate you for having the courage to speak out and ask for advice. That was step 1 of your private victory, now take the rest of the baby steps o becoming who you want to be.