MattGuy
February 8th, 2013, 05:47 PM
Right, i joined this forum to get help for what i am about to say, please tell me what i need to do to sort stuff out.
So, i am in my last year of high school and i have a fair few mates. I am not a normal guy, even though i am not gay at all, i am quite emotional when comparing myself to mates, for example i feel love like a girl would and love the idea of getting married just like a girl.
But thats just background info., through out my life I have just been raised by my mum and she has constantly drilled into my head how to treat a girl in the correct manner so that i become a 'gentleman'. However this has kind of messed things up for me, I now have a multiple personality and I will explain why.
When i started high school i wasnt a popular kid, i has around 5 friends and i hated this, so i grew my hair and tried to see how i could be more popular by looking how other popular people behaved and it worked perfectly I now have countless amounts of people i talk to, but this way of acting has become some kind of safety shield when talking to people to hide the real me so now with most people I am seen as a sexual dick head that wants to rape children when i am older and i am a sensitive guy so these comments get to me.
This shield has also changed the person I am so I group girls. There are girls i consider to be sexual and so i cheesily flirt with them which i hate doing but i have no control over doing it as it just comes naturally to me now and there are also girls that i enjoy having normal conversations with however those girls also think im a dick.
So the fake personality that helped me get friends has now become my enemy and stops me from getting any sort of girlfriend as they think i just want them for sex, which i hate, because for me in a relationship I am only ready when the girl is, i am not going to force her to do anything with me.
Basically what i need help with is sorting this mess out, Im not a bad looking guy i've had relationships in the past. I know i wont be able to get rid of this shield because it has in a way, even though i hate to say it, become a part of who i am.
So what i am asking is how can i show people who i really am? I have friends but no real ones i trust to talk to as they will just laugh in my face. Thanks if you read all of that, i did shorten it as much as possible.
So, i am in my last year of high school and i have a fair few mates. I am not a normal guy, even though i am not gay at all, i am quite emotional when comparing myself to mates, for example i feel love like a girl would and love the idea of getting married just like a girl.
But thats just background info., through out my life I have just been raised by my mum and she has constantly drilled into my head how to treat a girl in the correct manner so that i become a 'gentleman'. However this has kind of messed things up for me, I now have a multiple personality and I will explain why.
When i started high school i wasnt a popular kid, i has around 5 friends and i hated this, so i grew my hair and tried to see how i could be more popular by looking how other popular people behaved and it worked perfectly I now have countless amounts of people i talk to, but this way of acting has become some kind of safety shield when talking to people to hide the real me so now with most people I am seen as a sexual dick head that wants to rape children when i am older and i am a sensitive guy so these comments get to me.
This shield has also changed the person I am so I group girls. There are girls i consider to be sexual and so i cheesily flirt with them which i hate doing but i have no control over doing it as it just comes naturally to me now and there are also girls that i enjoy having normal conversations with however those girls also think im a dick.
So the fake personality that helped me get friends has now become my enemy and stops me from getting any sort of girlfriend as they think i just want them for sex, which i hate, because for me in a relationship I am only ready when the girl is, i am not going to force her to do anything with me.
Basically what i need help with is sorting this mess out, Im not a bad looking guy i've had relationships in the past. I know i wont be able to get rid of this shield because it has in a way, even though i hate to say it, become a part of who i am.
So what i am asking is how can i show people who i really am? I have friends but no real ones i trust to talk to as they will just laugh in my face. Thanks if you read all of that, i did shorten it as much as possible.