Is it normal for a 17-year old guy to have low self esteem?

[Jman437]

The title says it all: I'm a 17 year old boy who has low self esteem. My friends tell me that not even girls have self esteem as low as me. Is this really a normal thing, or have I got a personality disorder? Because for a 17 year old boy it's not really that normal to be extremely insecure, I guess.

[Sonic Boom]

Pretty much anyone can have low self esteem. Whether you're male, female, young, old etc, is irrelevant.

But you've made a good start by talking about it here. Many of us have low self-esteem, so you're not alone :)

[Jman437]

Pretty much anyone can have low self esteem. Whether you're male, female, young, old etc, is irrelevant.

But you've made a good start by talking about it here. Many of us have low self-esteem, so you're not alone :)

I bet you I'm the only 17 year old guy here who is shy, an introvert, has never had a girlfriend, has a low self esteem and doesn't really have any friends, because whenever I talk to anyone them about it I feel worse than shit because they've all gone through this phase, have a girlfriend, and tease me, humiliate me because of the fact I'm more insecure than the most insecure girls out there. Believe me, it's not that normal...

[screamtobeheard]

It's not abnormal. People like you don't want to talk about it around other people, kind of like how you are. Trust me when I tell you there are people out there who are just as insecure as you, in the same situation as you. In any case, you should try to start building your self esteem.

[Jman437]

It's not abnormal. People like you don't want to talk about it around other people, kind of like how you are. Trust me when I tell you there are people out there who are just as insecure as you, in the same situation as you. In any case, you should try to start building your self esteem.

They're pretty far away for me, if there is someone who is a complete loser like me. Btw, girls are naturally self-conscious, while guys are naturally confident, but I don't have that natural confidence, I don't have any confidence at all, that's why I think my case is abnormal, which it is.
I don't know any way of working my self esteem, I don't even know where to begin. I know lots of stuff about confidence, but I can't practice what I preach...

[screamtobeheard]

They're pretty far away for me, if there is someone who is a complete loser like me. Btw, girls are naturally self-conscious, while guys are naturally confident, but I don't have that natural confidence, I don't have any confidence at all, that's why I think my case is abnormal, which it is.
I don't know any way of working my self esteem, I don't even know where to begin. I know lots of stuff about confidence, but I can't practice what I preach...

Guys aren't naturally confident. I know it's hard to believe that since it's coming from a girl, but all my friends are guys, and it's not hard to see that they're not all as confident as everyone seems to think they should be.

[brandon1995]

I would say it normal to sometimes have low self esteem, but if you feel like that always you might want to get some help.

[workingatperfect]

I bet you I'm the only 17 year old guy here who is shy, an introvert, has never had a girlfriend, has a low self esteem and doesn't really have any friends, because whenever I talk to anyone them about it I feel worse than shit because they've all gone through this phase, have a girlfriend, and tease me, humiliate me because of the fact I'm more insecure than the most insecure girls out there. Believe me, it's not that normal...

Actually, my boyfriend is almost 18, and aside from having a girlfriend (I'm his first, we met on here) he's a lot like that. You'd be surprised how many guys there are on this site that are EXACTLY what you described. It's actually quite normal for guys to have low self esteem just like it's normal for girls. No one is born confident or self conscious because of their gender.The problem is that society tries to make it seem like guys should just be completely confident, and then when a guy does feel a little down about himself, it makes him feel even worse because he thinks something is wrong with him, when in reality, everyone struggles with their self esteem no matter how old or young they are, or whether they're a boy or girl.

You're not alone. Look around the site, it's basically a safe haven for troubled teens. There's a lot of people here who deal with the same feelings you're dealing with.

[Jman437]

I would say it normal to sometimes have low self esteem, but if you feel like that always you might want to get some help.

I don't always feel like this. In fact, this is the second time this month, and it always happens after I make a school exam, when I overthink or when I talk with my parents about relationships and girls(I never had a girlfriend and all the girls get away from me). It's just that things never seem to go my way, I feel lonely as hell because I have no real friends who I can talk to except my parents(I have one who's just like me, but he isn't always available), I want a girlfriend but all the girls seem to be afraid of me, my grades suck and I study and work hard, I'm extremely shy, introverted and awkward, so I can't make any more friends . Do you people still think there are losers like me in the world? You have NEVER been so wrong in your lives.

[workingatperfect]

You are not a loser. If you are, then so am I. You know how many friends I have? Zero. Because even when I do manage to talk to someone I can never seem to get past casual conversation in class and actually become friends with someone. On the rare occasion I do make a friend, they get bored of me in a few months. The only reason I have a boyfriend is because I met him online. In real life, I don't have the courage to talk to guys. Hell, I had to switch to an online school because the loneliness at school was too depressing and stressful for me and I was failing. And when I say failing, I mean 30-50% in every single class. Do you still think you're alone here?

[Zenos]

The title says it all: I'm a 17 year old boy who has low self esteem. My friends tell me that not even girls have self esteem as low as me. Is this really a normal thing, or have I got a personality disorder? Because for a 17 year old boy it's not really that normal to be extremely insecure, I guess.

Anyone at any age can have low self-esteem.

My advice is find something you can do,and that you cna be proud of doing,because as people compliment you it'll help build your self-esteem.

[Anonimi]

I bet you I'm the only 17 year old guy here who is shy, an introvert, has never had a girlfriend, has a low self esteem and doesn't really have any friends, because whenever I talk to anyone them about it I feel worse than shit because they've all gone through this phase, have a girlfriend, and tease me, humiliate me because of the fact I'm more insecure than the most insecure girls out there. Believe me, it's not that normal...

oh alot of insecure people come on this forums, i myself come here to tell people what i can't tell people irl, but i have seen a couple guys from 15-19 who feel that way, and they went through that phase, so you will too, i am sure

[Jman437]

You are not a loser. If you are, then so am I. You know how many friends I have? Zero. Because even when I do manage to talk to someone I can never seem to get past casual conversation in class and actually become friends with someone. On the rare occasion I do make a friend, they get bored of me in a few months. The only reason I have a boyfriend is because I met him online. In real life, I don't have the courage to talk to guys. Hell, I had to switch to an online school because the loneliness at school was too depressing and stressful for me and I was failing. And when I say failing, I mean 30-50% in every single class. Do you still think you're alone here?

But you and your bf have each other, for christ's sake!!. I have almost NOTHING!!! I don't have any friends who I can talk to, I only have my parents and another friend(although he's not always available), girls get away from me, so I can't get a girlfriend. And if I ever get one *coughs*, you will not see insecure Jman437 anymore, because when you have someone who fully supports you, cares about you, will stand by your side no matter what and is always there for you, you don't need to feel insecure!! Use me as an example of how lonely you could be and how shitty your life could be, because the only reason I haven't killed myself is because I only want to see what I'll become

[Jman437]

oh alot of insecure people come on this forums, i myself come here to tell people what i can't tell people irl, but i have seen a couple guys from 15-19 who feel that way, and they went through that phase, so you will too, i am sure

There may be lots of insecure guys, but my case is the worst in the world, no doubt about that...

[workingatperfect]

But you and your bf have each other, for christ's sake!!. I have almost NOTHING!!! I don't have any friends who I can talk to, I only have my parents and another friend(although he's not always available), girls get away from me, so I can't get a girlfriend. And if I ever get one *coughs*, you will not see insecure Jman437 anymore, because when you have someone who fully supports you, cares about you, will stand by your side no matter what and is always there for you, you don't need to feel insecure!! Use me as an example of how lonely you could be and how shitty your life could be, because the only reason I haven't killed myself is because I only want to see what I'll become

OK, even if I'm not AS lonely anymore, I sure as hell have been, and so has just about everyone else here. And if getting a girlfriend would solve all your problems, then I guess I'm worse off than you, because I have a boyfriend and still hate myself.

[Stryker125]

Anyone can have low self esteem. Gender or age is of no consequence. There's nothing wrong with you man. I bet you're awesome. You just gotta come out of your shell, and let other people see it. You say you don't have anyone, well you've got me if you want me. Not much, but that's all I got. Contact info is on my page if you ever wanna talk.

[Jman437]

OK, even if I'm not AS lonely anymore, I sure as hell have been, and so has just about everyone else here. And if getting a girlfriend would solve all your problems, then I guess I'm worse off than you, because I have a boyfriend and still hate myself.

But you don't need to feel that way, because I bet you're the world to him, and if you're not, break up with him. It's not like you're married of something xd

[Jman437]

Anyone can have low self esteem. Gender or age is of no consequence. There's nothing wrong with you man. I bet you're awesome. You just gotta come out of your shell, and let other people see it. You say you don't have anyone, well you've got me if you want me. Not much, but that's all I got. Contact info is on my page if you ever wanna talk.

That's the reason I'm an introvert: I try to get out of my shell, but it always end up in scaring people away, because I'm awkward as fuck...

[Stryker125]

Then keep coming out of your shell. Eventually you'll meet someone who isn't scared off by awkwardness. Hell, they might even embrace it.

[Jman437]

Then keep coming out of your shell. Eventually you'll meet someone who isn't scared off by awkwardness. Hell, they might even embrace it.

That's okay, as long as I'm married by 30

[Stryker125]

haha well that's cool too I guess. I'm here if you ever wanna talk

[Jman437]

haha well that's cool too I guess. I'm here if you ever wanna talk

Thanks man ;)

[Eclipsical]

Nope. You're a complete freak! Noone 17 has EVER had self esteem issues.

Weirdo.

[clarksonian]

Nope. You're a complete freak! Noone 17 has EVER had self esteem issues.

Weirdo.

Stahp. Its fine. I had a very low self esteem until my last girlfriend but she really helped me build it now my self esteem is great

[Jman437]

Stahp. Its fine. I had a very low self esteem until my last girlfriend but she really helped me build it now my self esteem is great

But I never had a girlfriend and I'm really awkward around girls. A girlfriend would be great to give my self-esteem a significant boost...

[alex1642]

I wouldn't say it's normal, but it's not abnormal. Try talking to people more and more about things. Take small bites of the cookie and then finally you will be able to have some of the whole thing