I chose him over her

[billiam183]

So some may say I had the best of both worlds but I felt prrtty guilty while this was happening. I was in a relationship with a girl. While dating her I met a guy. Who I started dating simultaneously. He and i started getting physical more than my girlfriend and i. Soon i didnt find myself attracted sexually to her, but only to him. Neither of them knew at first but the guy found out. Well I broke it off with my girlfriend and now im dating the guy. He is 25 years old and 8 years older than I. Im happy with him but wanted to know if others thought I made the right decision or not.

[teen.jpg]

Probably not. If he is that much older then you, then there isn't anywhere the relationship can really lead to.

Even still, best of luck to you!

[billiam183]

Probably not. If he is that much older then you, then there isn't anywhere the relationship can really lead to.

Even still, best of luck to you!

Well why do you say there is nowhere the relationship can lead to. Its been taking its course for the last month.

[Lyra Heartstrings]

You're..17, if my math hasn't failed me. Why are you dating a 25 year old? Seems rather silly to me. Date someone your age. Either way, best of luck to you.

[Dunce]

If you liked him more than her then you were probably right not to stay with her, but an age gap like that will be difficult.

[Lovelife090994]

Isn't this illegal somewhere? You're 17, he's 25? Talk about an age mismatch.

[billiam183]

Isn't this illegal somewhere? You're 17, he's 25? Talk about an age mismatch.

Yes the age gap is quite large. Its difficult for others to see from the outside though. Im sure it is illegal somewhere, but It is not illegal in my state. Although still, its not very smiled upon.

[billiam183]

You're..17, if my math hasn't failed me. Why are you dating a 25 year old? Seems rather silly to me. Date someone your age. Either way, best of luck to you.

Trust me kid, I didn't say to myself, "find a 25 year old"
And it certainly isnt silly, its pretty serious actually.

[Lovelife090994]

Trust me kid, I didn't say to myself, "find a 25 year old"
And it certainly isnt silly, its pretty serious actually.

Forgive my misunderstanding but what was your question since this vendetta seems serious?

[Wonder.]

I don't find 17 and 25 that bad. Sure it's 8 years apart but it's better than 14 and 22.

Anyways, in the end I think you made the right decision. You obviously shouldn't have cheated but at least now you're with someone who makes you happy. If I were you though, I would talk to the girl and tell her the complete and honest truth. I imagine it would hurt to know that your lover cheated on you but I would still want to know the reasoning behind it.

[billiam183]

Forgive my misunderstanding but what was your question since this vendetta seems serious?

Serious is the relationship. What of a vendetta?

[Lost in the Echo]

I think you made the right decision. You said you're happy with him, and you said you were losing interest in your girlfriend.
So yeah, you made the right decision. :)
You're with someone who makes you happy.

Also, to anyone who comments on the age difference: Age is just a number, just because this guy is 8 years younger than his partner, doesn't mean he isn't as mature.

[Lovelife090994]

Serious is the relationship. What of a vendetta?

The vendetta is you're obviously in question if you asked something.

[Bougainvillea]

First off, if you had questions about your sexuality and you found yourself to be trying to get someone else's attention, you should've ended it with her instead of cheating because that's a really shitty thing to do. I don't know why you would do that. There's no excuse for it.

Second, you seem pretty set on the idea that your relationship is completely justifiable so I don't really know what you want us to say. Also, I personally would say to not think too much into your relationship. I can't see any grown man who would want to be with a seventeen year old out of pure compassion. He's in it for something, and I don't trust it.

[billiam183]

First off, if you had questions about your sexuality and you found yourself to be trying to get someone else's attention, you should've ended it with her instead of cheating because that's a really shitty thing to do. I don't know why you would do that. There's no excuse for it.

Second, you seem pretty set on the idea that your relationship is completely justifiable so I don't really know what you want us to say. Also, I personally would say to not think too much into your relationship. I can't see any grown man who would want to be with a seventeen year old out of pure compassion. He's in it for something, and I don't trust it.

I was just a little conflicted at the time. And wondered what others thought of the situation/ age difference. And while I've been with him for about two months, we havnt had sex. So if thats what your hinting towards, no. Its not a relationship based on sex, but yes, compassion. And yes, I found myself in question. And now that I've decided, I did end it with the girl.

[billiam183]

The vendetta is you're obviously in question if you asked something.

At this point the "vendetta" is not serious. The only question was really 'what others think of the age difference and my decision to be with him rather than her.'
I asked for input, not judgement. Not that it would change how I feel on my relationship. I've already made my choice so its a light issue at this point.

[Lovelife090994]

At this point the "vendetta" is not serious. The only question was really 'what others think of the age difference and my decision to be with him rather than her.'
I asked for input, not judgement. Not that it would change how I feel on my relationship. I've already made my choice so its a light issue at this point.

It was not judgement, it was stating what I saw but with a warning, you had it half right.

[Devonb97]

You're a terrible person for cheating. You should have broken up with her first.

[billiam183]

You're a terrible person for cheating. You should have broken up with her first.

O well okay. Now I know. Terrible person. I'm glad though, that she doesn't think so and our friendship is as strong as its ever been, as is my relationship. I wonder why all these fantastic people are associating themselves with such a terrible person.

[johnsmith1]

O well okay. Now I know. Terrible person. I'm glad though, that she doesn't think so and our friendship is as strong as its ever been, as is my relationship. I wonder why all these fantastic people are associating themselves with such a terrible person.

You are not a terrible person. There are pleanty of people out there that have been cheating for years, and by the sounds of it you went tform your GF to your current BF pretty quickly and these things do happen.
As for the 17 & 25 thing, I say so what. Don't let all these people say it's an issue. It's only an issue if you and your partner let it be. Noone knows what the future holds. I do hope you're bith happy together as that is what counts

[xmojox]

O well okay. Now I know. Terrible person. I'm glad though, that she doesn't think so and our friendship is as strong as its ever been, as is my relationship. I wonder why all these fantastic people are associating themselves with such a terrible person.

You're not a terrible person. It's a hard situation to be in. It sounds like you made the right decision. The age difference doesn't matter as long as you guys are happy. Best of luck to you, man. :)

[Magnus Bane]

Leave the man alone my parents are ten years apart they worked out just fine 4 kids and r still married. I support you billiam. Good luck hope you have many happy times with him.

[lukene]

First off, if you had questions about your sexuality and you found yourself to be trying to get someone else's attention, you should've ended it with her instead of cheating because that's a really shitty thing to do. I don't know why you would do that. There's no excuse for it.

Second, you seem pretty set on the idea that your relationship is completely justifiable so I don't really know what you want us to say. Also, I personally would say to not think too much into your relationship. I can't see any grown man who would want to be with a seventeen year old out of pure compassion. He's in it for something, and I don't trust it.

Don't get me wrong but I really don't think you can say he is in it for something when you have no idea of the details. I had a boyfriend who was 6 years older than me and he most certainly wasn't using me, I end up breaking up with him because of distance (it was kind of a mutual decision) and it was hard for both of us , he wasn't in it for anything except because he liked me. So don't jump to conclusions.

[JonasBe]

You did the right thing by breaking it off with your girlfriend. You obviously weren't attracted to her anymore, and now things are going fine between you and your bf.

I'm not a fan of the cheating though, but shit happens.
About the age gap... don't worry too much about it. It might work out fine, so just enjoy it.

[AbernathyElkwood]

If you love and care about him, you shouldn't feel too bad. It's bad that you cheated on your girlfriend, but I hope that you can fight past that and learn from your mistakes there. Good luck.<33