YEAH BABY
January 9th, 2013, 03:34 PM
Dont know, she might respond to my text, therefore, changing the situation, but basically, my gf who lives a few states from me, is going through alot, including her anorexia, but i decided to post this here, cause i think alot more is bothering her.
She hasnt talked to me for a whole day yesterday, and only just texted me back today with a message that made me stop everything I was doing just to respond to.
This is how it went:
Me: Hey love idk whats going on but i love you and i hope everythings alright on your side. Its so unlike you to not text me, so thats why I am a little worried. If anything is bothering you, tell me. We promised each other that we wouldn't hide anything from each other, so please telll me whats going on. I miss you love
Her: I'm just having a rlly hard time&it's easy to isolate. I'm far beyond being depressed at this point, school is kicking my ass right not&im just exhauste. I hate treatment&i've just been extremly busy. I'm on the verge of a complete meltdown basically...i just can't handle it all and I can't take a breakeither. I've never felt more overwhelmed in my life. It alll just sucks so much right now&i hate my life atm. The last thing I feel like doing is being ust acting happy&i just am afraid of tlking because i'll probably say the wrong things&act like I hate u even though I don't at all. Sometimes I just ned space, it's just I didn't have the energy to explain it all earlier.
Me: im so so so beyond sorry babe :( Things seem real real hard :( Im here for you, i will always be <3 I would really like to talk to you about everything later, i want to comfort you
Her: I'm just done Sam..it's all too much. The last thing I want is to bring u down w/ me..and yeah u may have felt this bad before, but I just can't even bein to explain what it's like to have an eating disorder...it's not even about the food or being in the end, ik that won't make me happy. It's just idk hw to even explain it. How can anyone help me if they don't get it? I mean no offense by that, but many times I feel u don't. Idk i'm just rlly lost.
Me: Are u saying u dont want me anymore?
Her: No, im saying that what i'm going thru something that is beyone ur understanding I feel&it's hard to want to tlk about it when all I wanna do is sleep. just don't think u should want me. I'm basically dead alive right now.
Me: I really like you and i think you need to do whats best for you, which is get help with someone for your anorexia. Think about it love, in the long run you'll get better. It might take awhile, but they'll help you and they will lead you to the way out of it. You might not want to listen to my advice, but i think its best for you, and im only saying this 'cause i care. you have many friends and family who i'm sure love you to death, think about how all of us would feel if you were to no longer be alive. we would ALL be a wreck. I may not be able to help like others could, but im supporting you. I may not understand, but i care.
And no matter how messed up things are, I will always always like you very much <3
So, its all really confusing. So as far as i know, we are together still. She may respond later saying its too much right now, or she will feel better from my words. Dont know. I want to stay and support her, and you can see I am, but then again i dont want to loose her, cause I would never forgive myself if something serious happened to her.
:/
She hasnt talked to me for a whole day yesterday, and only just texted me back today with a message that made me stop everything I was doing just to respond to.
This is how it went:
Me: Hey love idk whats going on but i love you and i hope everythings alright on your side. Its so unlike you to not text me, so thats why I am a little worried. If anything is bothering you, tell me. We promised each other that we wouldn't hide anything from each other, so please telll me whats going on. I miss you love
Her: I'm just having a rlly hard time&it's easy to isolate. I'm far beyond being depressed at this point, school is kicking my ass right not&im just exhauste. I hate treatment&i've just been extremly busy. I'm on the verge of a complete meltdown basically...i just can't handle it all and I can't take a breakeither. I've never felt more overwhelmed in my life. It alll just sucks so much right now&i hate my life atm. The last thing I feel like doing is being ust acting happy&i just am afraid of tlking because i'll probably say the wrong things&act like I hate u even though I don't at all. Sometimes I just ned space, it's just I didn't have the energy to explain it all earlier.
Me: im so so so beyond sorry babe :( Things seem real real hard :( Im here for you, i will always be <3 I would really like to talk to you about everything later, i want to comfort you
Her: I'm just done Sam..it's all too much. The last thing I want is to bring u down w/ me..and yeah u may have felt this bad before, but I just can't even bein to explain what it's like to have an eating disorder...it's not even about the food or being in the end, ik that won't make me happy. It's just idk hw to even explain it. How can anyone help me if they don't get it? I mean no offense by that, but many times I feel u don't. Idk i'm just rlly lost.
Me: Are u saying u dont want me anymore?
Her: No, im saying that what i'm going thru something that is beyone ur understanding I feel&it's hard to want to tlk about it when all I wanna do is sleep. just don't think u should want me. I'm basically dead alive right now.
Me: I really like you and i think you need to do whats best for you, which is get help with someone for your anorexia. Think about it love, in the long run you'll get better. It might take awhile, but they'll help you and they will lead you to the way out of it. You might not want to listen to my advice, but i think its best for you, and im only saying this 'cause i care. you have many friends and family who i'm sure love you to death, think about how all of us would feel if you were to no longer be alive. we would ALL be a wreck. I may not be able to help like others could, but im supporting you. I may not understand, but i care.
And no matter how messed up things are, I will always always like you very much <3
So, its all really confusing. So as far as i know, we are together still. She may respond later saying its too much right now, or she will feel better from my words. Dont know. I want to stay and support her, and you can see I am, but then again i dont want to loose her, cause I would never forgive myself if something serious happened to her.
:/