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SSB09
January 9th, 2013, 03:27 PM
For as long as I can remember, my sister and I have had a very rough relationship. She's always been this awful person towards me. She's always been saying awful things to me and constantly tries to put me down. I never really understood why, but she has always just hated me...

The reason I bring this up now is because I was previously getting help from a Facebook group. I would post about my sister there whenever she got on my nerves, and they'd always try to help me but to no avail... So, now I'm here.

So, I thought I'd write a short overview of both of us and a small passage about the environment we grew up in so you can get the full picture:

I am currently 15 years old. I'm a very calm, peace loving person and haven't been in an actually fight outside of my family. I would never hurt or injure anyone and feel very little hate towards anyone. I am a very introverted person, and prefer my own company to another persons. I tend to spend a lot of time in my room on the internet when not at school. I am infamous for being lazy and, as a result, am overweight. I also have an eating obsession, often sneaking downstairs in the middle of the night. I also have ADD, Non- Verbal Learning Disorder and suffer from Gluten intolerance.

My sister is 17 years old at the moment, a year and a half older than I am. She is very social and has a quite large number of friends. She goes to an all Girls school, and doesn't really socialize with the other gender. She is very close-minded, often shooting down anything she doesn't like or agree with. As a result, we find very little connection between us.

I have some pretty awful memory, so I can only remember snip-its on information from recent years, all of which of her generally being hateful in various ways, along with occasional fist fights and other violence that broke out between us.

I can't remember when it started, but one thing I remember happened when I was about 10 years old. My sister and I wear watching TV and I was sitting on the sofa with my laptop on my chest. Basically, we ended up getting in an argument that ended with my sister standing up and slamming my laptop shut on my upper lip. I screamed, and she just walked out of the room and barricaded herself in her bed room for the next day or two. I rolled around on the floor for hours, just screaming and crying. Eventually, I was taken to the Hospital and received stitches. I was left with a very large purple mark on my face for the next 7-8 months, and never received an apology.

Another incident happened around that same time. When I was younger, I wanted to become a Youtube Let's play and Commentator. I was halfway through recording when she came in the room. I gave her a "I'm in the middle of something" look, but she came in and sat down on the sofa. I continued playing and commentating, and she kept on adding rude comments, like "Nobody is going to watch this." and "You're so weird, stop making videos." Eventually, I ended up snapping, and proceeded to tackle her. That's the last thing I remember. I don't remember who won...

There's a gap after that, where we moved back to America and started settling into new schools. She went to the all girls school she attends now, and I joined a private school, before changing to Public due to money problems. She continued to mock me for the next year or so. Then, there was a gap where we actually got along pretty well. She stopped the insults, and we became pretty close. I actually enjoyed her company, which hadn't happened since we were kids.

This temporary calm lasted for 3-4 months and we had become almost friends. But then my eating obsession started to gain speed. I started going downstairs and eating in the middle of the night, which wasn't much of a problem until one day, my sister was furious with me. I'm guessing I ate something she was saving or something, but she cut off all communication with me for the next 2-3 days. I knew then that what we had was over, and we were back to being enemies, and I was genuinely upset by that.

Over the next year or so, she became fiercer than ever. She would just viciously insult me at random moments and physically assaulted me at several points. Around this time, I fell into a very deep depression, and at one point had a rope in my closet, just in case. Luckily I never brought myself to actually harm myself.

During my depression, we were having counselling at school, where all the guys in my grade came together to talk about puberty, the opposite gender, etc. At one point during one of the meetings, I brought up my sister, and how she was pretty much bullying me. The counselor asked me to come to her room 2 days later, and asked me to tell her more about my sister. I told her everything there was to tell, and she was concerned. She asked me if she could e-mail my parents, and I gave her the e-mail address and left. I went back to her shortly after, and told her how noting had changed. She then said she would call my parents.

When I got home, I waited downstairs for the phone to ring. We were half way through dinner when I decided to tell my parents she was going to call. They were absolutely furious, but not compared to my sister. When she heard this, she sat there and cried for a moment or two, then started trembling all over. She laid her face on the table, and stayed still for a moment. She then got up from her chair, hair still covering her face, walked around the table and then gave me a solid punch to the face. I fell to the floor, and she ran upstairs. That's all I can remember. The counselor never called.


That was a little over two years ago. Since then, my parents have done nothing to help. They can barely do anything about her. She went into councilling for a while, but stopped going shortly after. She continues to barrage me with insults. Even when she isn't verbally assaulting me, I can feel the pure hate radiating off of her. It hurts. It hurts to be in the same room as her. It hurts know what she tells her friends about me. Her words cut me... and I can't fight back.

FreeFall
January 10th, 2013, 01:57 PM
Understand you can NEVER speak of her, about her, to anyone, ever. You must get in private, or she will escalate. She's not rational, she's not sane and she's dangerous. Never ever speak about her in front of her, at dinner your luck you sister only punched you. And your parents. They let her. Shame on them.

As for your parents, bull shit. Bull. Shit. They can do something about her. They have so many options. They CHOOSE not to. Can you understand that? They can send her to facilities, camps, anything. They're letting her hurt you, and they're not helping her when she very desperately needs them. Your sister's an awful person, but they could care less huh? They fail as parents.

You can fight back but in your OWN way.

Keep to yourself.
Whens he walks in, walk out without her finding a way to badger you about "avoiding" her.
Ignore her. I beg you, ignore her. She's dead to you. Understand? She IS dead. You do not have a sister. There's a creature, a monster, that will prey on you. But that is not your sister. That is not what a sister is.
If you can, learn self defense. Even off of youtube. You need to learn how to protect yourself and disarm her. Be serious about learning defense.
Is there a lock on your door? If not, get one. Chain lock, screw in bolt, a chain and pad-lock. You need it.
DO NOT EAT HER FOOD. Buy a mini-fridge for YOURSELF. Get a bag to stuff foods into. Keep it in YOUR room. Learn to fight your obsession if you can't get a bag or personal fridge because frankly, it's extremely rude and selfish. That food in that fridge isn't just for you and you sneaking to get it, it comes off as if you're stealing from the family. One you shouldn't "sneak" to the fridge or get to a point you just eat things that are not your's and/or you don't even know what food it is you are eating.
Let your parents know they've let you down and your sister down. They need to help you, you know be parents. If they see how much they've failed BOTH of their children, it may be their wake-up call to actually do something for her and YOU, most importantly is you.
If your parents dismiss your concerns or get angry at you, you now know who your parents really are. Selfish, distant, apathetic and uncaring. Parents duty is tot heir children. They're responsible for keeping their children healthy, happy and safe. They're letting your sister terrorize you, they're letting her damage herself with this behavior. They aren't your support system, they're trying to say roll over and deal with it by not helping anyone involved. Even themselves.


Just pretty much isolate yourself from her, and learn defense for those days she comes charging at you unprovoked.
You can do this.
You can get through this.
You're strong.
You may never be friends with your sister, she may get worse, but you will find a way to be free of her wrath.

IVIodern
January 10th, 2013, 02:09 PM
If none of the above works and it keeps happening, sorry to say this but the police is the way to go. You shouldn't have to put up with shit like that, especially from your own sister.