happinessisoverrated
January 6th, 2013, 05:32 PM
I started cutting about 2 years ago, and it got really bad. I had to take the semester off of school to deal with my depression and get back on track, and I was doing really well. I have a psychologist and I stopped cutting and I felt so much better.. For a while.
For about a week now all of my old anxieties have come back, and I'm realizing how soon I'll have to go back to school and I have so few friends left and I haven't seen anyone from school and all this sh*t and I just feel so alone.. I've started cutting again. I keep a razor in my desk drawer and I cut myself every day. I don't know what's happening to me. I feel like I'm right back where I started, and I hate myself for throwing all my success away.
My boyfriend said that I just fell down and I need to 'get back on the horse' so to speak, but I don't know how.. I'm addicted all over again. I keep breaking and cutting and screaming into pillows and shaking and - when I get frustrated enough - punching my thighs until it hurts so much that I can't breathe..
What do I do? Anyone have any idea how I can get through this?
I need help.
For about a week now all of my old anxieties have come back, and I'm realizing how soon I'll have to go back to school and I have so few friends left and I haven't seen anyone from school and all this sh*t and I just feel so alone.. I've started cutting again. I keep a razor in my desk drawer and I cut myself every day. I don't know what's happening to me. I feel like I'm right back where I started, and I hate myself for throwing all my success away.
My boyfriend said that I just fell down and I need to 'get back on the horse' so to speak, but I don't know how.. I'm addicted all over again. I keep breaking and cutting and screaming into pillows and shaking and - when I get frustrated enough - punching my thighs until it hurts so much that I can't breathe..
What do I do? Anyone have any idea how I can get through this?
I need help.