Welp.

[Quick_Sylver]

So. Since October, though I can't pinpoint it exactly, I'll have a very light breakfast, think a bagel with light spread of butter on it, yogurt cup smaller than fist kinda thing, go through school, have a small fudge cookie at lunch or during last block... And then when I get home I eat very lightly, couple of crackers, a handful of vegetables, small servings for even children.

Even with the holidays, due my family not being a huge "Sit down dinner" group, I've managed more or less the same level of food intake.

At the same time I realize it's not enough.

And at the same time I don't care.

I've known for a while I've got some form of disordered eating, if things have been extremely stressful I can't eat much, if any. If things are stablish in my life, I'll eat a bit more, but not a lot.

My issue here is now more of "My collarbones are vaguely visible, my hip bones are feelable... and other things are getting smaller.." which while psyching me out is making me happy.

This is more "How can I stabilize my food intake without overwhelming my dislike of it, and inability?"

So.. anyone have suggestions? And please, please, PLEASE do not suggest meal "charts" or "calorie charts". That's something which has made it worse before, so I'd rather not go down that route if I can avoid it.

[lightPainting]

i would suggest eating more fruit.
there are three reasons why, 1, they are low in calories and high in water so you can stay hydrated ,2. they have the vitamins and mineral that you need daily, 3.there are alot of crappy food out there and I found that this is the best way to have a happy and healthy life.[if you have any questions, just message me.]

[Jupiter]

you do care, which is a good thing. wanna know how i can tell, hun? cuz you're asking for help. that's one of the best steps to start with.

i can relate to the "not sit down" dinner thing. that's how mine is, and it's dangerous for people who fear the affects of food.

basically what it think is that you need to eat more and more food each day, just slowly. once you eat a food and you want to finish eating, think.. "just one more cracker." you can do that, or you could have a few more. i mean, eventually you'll get used to it. eventually you'll get better, if you do this, i think at least. are you one who would throw up after eating?

[Quick_Sylver]

you do care, which is a good thing. wanna know how i can tell, hun? cuz you're asking for help. that's one of the best steps to start with.

i can relate to the "not sit down" dinner thing. that's how mine is, and it's dangerous for people who fear the affects of food.

basically what it think is that you need to eat more and more food each day, just slowly. once you eat a food and you want to finish eating, think.. "just one more cracker." you can do that, or you could have a few more. i mean, eventually you'll get used to it. eventually you'll get better, if you do this, i think at least. are you one who would throw up after eating?

Depends on the meal, if it's the "Homestyle deliciousness" I'd be willing to purge, and usually don't. I've been trying the "one more" thing for a while but it's getting to the point where it's "One less and you'll be a bit healthier."

And really, I don't know my weight right now, and that's probably a really damn good thing. I'm about to start taking Tae Kwon Do, and that'll probably encourage an appetite, but the little voice.. heh. There's a little voice in my head going "be thinner, be better, be healthier, be prettier, you'll be lovelier if you don't eat..."

i would suggest eating more fruit.
there are three reasons why, 1, they are low in calories and high in water so you can stay hydrated ,2. they have the vitamins and mineral that you need daily, 3.there are alot of crappy food out there and I found that this is the best way to have a happy and healthy life.[if you have any questions, just message me.]

Unfortunately an almost fruit diet, while something which I'd much more prefer, is not something I can manage with a) money, or b) parents noticing and putting me in a psych ward because that's how my mother would deal with it.