A poem about time machines

[Sordid Saint]

Hey, I wrote this during first period of school just now, it took like less than an hour so I will probably fix a few parts of it and then edit this post. I know it's not that good but I've been writing more so I will get better :) I hope lol

My life is filled with stuff I regret
It's seems that bad choices is what I do best
Sometimes I feel like theres an elephant at rest
On top of my shoulders from all of this stress
And all of the things in my life I detest
They all seem to gather and crowd in my head
Ive made the attempts to do better and yet
I have historical regrets that won't dissipate, unless...

If I could only go back to rethink the scenes*
I would change this sad story and all that it means
I'd change my ways and live my dreams
But that would require a time machine

I would do it all over, everyone would agree
That I'm a good person, not what everyone sees*
Show me the way, I beg you please
To the thing that would fix it all - a time machine*

I'd say the three words to the people I love
And fix what I've done to kill all the doves
I could be the person I've always wanted to be
If only I found a time machine

I would try my best to be less shy
So I could tell you how I feel without any lies
Maybe one day you'll see whats inside
And let me show you that I'm a good guy
I'd get rid of the days where I sit here and cry
If only there was a way to go back in time

But the flux capacitor is a fictional thing
So I'll sit and reflect on the life that I lived
I know I can't change anything that I did
The people I've hurt, and the drugs I let in
But if a second chance comes, I'll hold out my pinkie
And *promise I'd treat it like a time machine*

[Noirtier]

Other than this,

It's seems that bad choices is what I do best

where the grammatically correct structure would be "It seems..." rather than "It's seems...", I think that the piece is great. You've gotten the flow down really well in this work, and in all of your poems really, which can be a tough thing for a lot of people but it just seems to come naturally to you. The concept of the poem is really wonderful too, I think, and the way you portray your feelings is great, Quinn! Keep writing, you're doing great!

[Sordid Saint]

Other than this,



where the grammatically correct structure would be "It seems..." rather than "It's seems...", I think that the piece is great. You've gotten the flow down really well in this work, and in all of your poems really, which can be a tough thing for a lot of people but it just seems to come naturally to you. The concept of the poem is really wonderful too, I think, and the way you portray your feelings is great, Quinn! Keep writing, you're doing great!


Yea I just noticed that, it must have been an autocorrect thing on my phone :p

Thanks!

[Lost in the Echo]

Amazing poem. :)
In many ways, I can relate to it.

[Shade]

Brilliant work, man. This piece is so smooth and well-connected. It really makes one reflect on past mistakes and view the future in a different light. A thought-inspiring poem, to say the least.

[Sordid Saint]

Brilliant work, man. This piece is so smooth and well-connected. It really makes one reflect on past mistakes and view the future in a different light. A thought-inspiring poem, to say the least.

Thanks :) I didn't even think my writing was that good. I was just kinda feeling down about all this dumb stuff that I regret lol. Anyway thank you so much!