To much of an age gap?

[southern-boy]

Ok I have been talking to a girl thats 13 years old but I am 16. Im juat wandering if you guys think this is to much of an age gap?

[Lost in the Echo]

In my opinion, no it's not.
If you were 17, that would be pushing it, if you were 18, it would be illegal.
I think you're fine though, 3 years is not a big age gap at all. :)

[DerBear]

Honestly at that age, considering she is only 13 and you being 16. I'd have to say yes. The levels of maturity and expectancy are completely different. I know what you are thinking, what different from a 20 year old going out with a 23 year old. Its different when you are older because both parties have matured and can handle a relationship.

Someone who is 13 can't really handle a relationship with someone who is much older e.g 16 like yourself. The reason in most cases they can't is that a 13 year old has different expectations/views of what a relationship is like at that age. Whereas a 16 year old will have a different view on what a relationship is like.

Its hard to explain but I would think 13 year old shouldn't date a 16 year old.

[LouBerry]

Three years isn't that big of a deal. The only thing is parents usually have a thing with older guys.

[southern-boy]

Honestly at that age, considering she is only 13 and you being 16. I'd have to say yes. The levels of maturity and expectancy are completely different. I know what you are thinking, what different from a 20 year old going out with a 23 year old. Its different when you are older because both parties have matured and can handle a relationship.

Someone who is 13 can't really handle a relationship with someone who is much older e.g 16 like yourself. The reason in most cases they can't is that a 13 year old has different expectations/views of what a relationship is like at that age. Whereas a 16 year old will have a different view on what a relationship is like.

Its hard to explain but I would think 13 year old shouldn't date a 16 year old.

Thats what I was thinking.

[workingatperfect]

It really depends on the two of you. It's more about maturity than anything else. I know when I was 13 I hung out with much older people. But on the other side of that, when I was 16 I was too mature for most of the 13 year olds I knew. If she's at a typical maturity level for a 13 year old, it's not gonna work, unless you're fairly immature haha.

[Noirtier]

I know other people have told you that no, three years is not a big deal, etc., but I'm going to have to go with Derri (DerBear) on this one. 13 and 16 is a much bigger gap than 20 and 23, as he pointed out, because of the maturity level of the younger party. At this age, a three year gap is a bit too much. At an older age, it's not. Yeah, it's partially because of what has been drilled into our heads as societal norm too, but, in my opinion, 13 isn't really old enough to be in a relationship with another 13 year old. I had a relationship when I was 13, and honestly, looking back, I thought I was ready, but I sure as hell wasn't. And, pretty much everyone I know who had a relationship at that age feels the same way about theirs. It's your choice, but I would take Derri's advice to heart if I were in your situation.

[Lost in the Echo]

Thats what I was thinking.

Well yeah, maturity is a big factor, that's right.
But if you think she's mature enough though, then go for it.
If you're having doubts about her maturity, then wait until you guys are both adults.

[DerBear]

It really depends on the two of you. It's more about maturity than anything else. I know when I was 13 I hung out with much older people. But on the other side of that, when I was 16 I was too mature for most of the 13 year olds I knew. If she's at a typical maturity level for a 13 year old, it's not gonna work, unless you're fairly immature haha.

This is also a valid point that I never really mentioned. It can depend on how overall mentally mature both people are. However I still stick by what I said. 3 years one being 13 and you being 16, what you both look for and want in a relationship might be two completely different things. But Workingatperfect does make a valid point. Some 13 year olds are really good and mature. However he does give give a valid point in saying that if she is a normal 13 year old then it isn't going to work.

[Mysterious Skin]

I'm going to go ahead and ruin your day by saying yes. Psychologically there is too much of a difference. She is 13 and you are 16 the expectations out of a relationship are vastly different.

[TigerBoy]

I'm going to add another factor in here - life stages.

My boyfriend is 2 years younger. Its not a problem in terms of maturity for us, but we do have to work around the fact that we are taking different levels of education currently (luckily we'll both be doing exams at the same time and stuff). I'll be leaving school in the summer he won't. That means we're going to lose a really great routine we have right now and we might miss out on the quality time we get currently. I've factored him into taking an extended break from education rather than going straight into Uni. I'll hopefully be working (or unemployed) and he won't necessarily understand the issues and stresses from that.

None of that has to be a deal breaker, but it is an obstacle to overcome.

[xXJust Jump ItXx]

Honestly at that age, considering she is only 13 and you being 16. I'd have to say yes. The levels of maturity and expectancy are completely different. I know what you are thinking, what different from a 20 year old going out with a 23 year old. Its different when you are older because both parties have matured and can handle a relationship.

Someone who is 13 can't really handle a relationship with someone who is much older e.g 16 like yourself. The reason in most cases they can't is that a 13 year old has different expectations/views of what a relationship is like at that age. Whereas a 16 year old will have a different view on what a relationship is like.

Its hard to explain but I would think 13 year old shouldn't date a 16 year old.

I agree with you here. And only exception is if shes very mature, which is rare. My niece is 13, shes mature but she can be a normal 13 year girl at times... If you waited a year and I know, thats hard, so shes 14, that can work better.

[txtwister13]

thats probably a little to much of an age gap, your likely to get a lot of resistance from the girls parents....i know that if i had tried to date a 16 y.o. boy when i was 13 my parents would have freaked. in five years the age difference won't be a problem but now it probably will be.

[Jen Jones]

I think thats too much of a difference

[ali98]

Definitely not!

[MrDaniel2K13]

It all depends on your levels of maturity.

[Tank89]

In MY opinion yes! There is difference between 13 and 16 and 15-17 its just to early. A Sophmore/Junior dating a girl in the 8th grade... to early sorry my friend.

[kayleethegray]

I don't think you should date her, because she's 13, and a Junior in high school is more mature than an 8th grader. Wait a few more months until she's at your school level, or find a New girl!