Should I delete him off Facebook?

[Eric57]

I've posted about this same guy before and I just can't get over him or the situation...

Basically we went out 3 times, he said he didn't think it would work, and I ended up getting hurt because I liked him. Things ended on good terms and we are still friendly with each other. We don't hang out or anything, but things are fine.

I'm struggling with deciding if I should delete him off Facebook or not. The only reason I want to delete him is because I still like him. Every time I see a status from him, I get "butterflies" in my stomach or a feeling that is very nauseating. It just makes my stomach hurt to see him on Facebook...

I also want to delete him so he'll notice hoping he'd text me or something asking me why I deleted him. But I don't want to do that because I feel like it so childish and immature.

I don't know. I just like the guy still and I can't get over it. I feel like if I delete him it might make it a little better, but at the same time I feel like it would make it worse.

I know most people will say to just delete him, but even if I did decide I wanted to, I don't know if I could go through with it. haha

And good lord, look at me. I am 19 years old and I feel like I am acting like a 12 year old girl. Ugh, I don't know.

[ackmedsgirl666]

dont delete him
there are other ways to get over him without having to unfriend him\
you should try talking to him and telling him how you feel.. maybe he can help you out
its hard to get over the ones we love trust me i know the feeling
i still have an overwhelming obsession with my ex but i know it will probably never go away because me and him were very close
try talking to him but again if you wanna delete him its your choice

[FreeFall]

How I got over my ex. I blocked him on Facebook.

I was best friend with him since 7th grade. We got so close, and in the 10th after I broke up with a guy, we became a thing. Our feelings were so strong, but he never wanted to be my boyfriend.
He didn't want to ruin the friendship.

For over a year, we were in a thing. We were a couple but not recognized as such to ourselves. We finally dated, for 3 days. For 3, fucking days. After so long, after so many years.

I felt so devastated! How come it was so short? Why could it work? Why didn't it work? We had something for so long and poof?

I saw his statuses. I cried. I saw his photos, I cried. I realized I was not allowing myself to move on. I realized I had feelings for him.
I realized that by seeing his info and images everyday, I wasn't allowing myself that time I needed to myself to grieve and move on and get over him. Everything about him reset me back to 0. It made me still like him because it made me feel as though there was some hope. It made me cling because there he was, forever mind in a photo and in facebook history.

To save myself any further heartache, I made it so I couldn't see him. I allowed myself that time to move, I stopped myself to not look back and chain myself onto his wall to hope.
Now, in a healthy and committed relationship with a wonderful guy. It was worth it.

Had I never blocked him, I may not be where I am. I may have been a miserable, desperate thing and probably have thrown myself at him any chance I got and done anything I could to have him be with me. I was THAT attached to him, but now it's great. He's gay and blames me, hates me, wants me to die, and is an awful train wreck. Hard to believe it, but he was a huge train wreck BEFORE our "thing", he just hid like a champ. They say love will blind you, and holy shit it's true, I could not see anything in my stupid teenage lala emotions.

Do what you feel you must, but just remember yourself,

[Eric57]

Thanks guys. I ended up deleting him last night and I thought it would make me feel better, but honestly, it hasn't... I just keep thinking about it for some reason. I feel like I am acting so ridiculous and crazy about it... like I shouldn't be feeling this way.

[Lost in the Echo]

Thanks guys. I ended up deleting him last night and I thought it would make me feel better, but honestly, it hasn't... I just keep thinking about it for some reason. I feel like I am acting so ridiculous and crazy about it... like I shouldn't be feeling this way.

Honestly, that was pretty fucking immature of you.
Just because he didn't feel the same way about you as you did him, doesn't mean you have to be a prick and delete him from your facebook profile.

Not trying to offend you, i'm just being honest.

Imagine if you were in his position, he likes you as a friend, nothing more, so just deal with it.
Try to look at things from HIS point of view.

Maybe if you told him how you feel about him, then he might consider a relationship with you.
But what you did was kinda disrespectful, you might have ruined the friendship you guys had.

I think the only reason you deleted him was because of the heat of the moment, but you should have put more thought into this.
Maybe, you just lost him as a friend, I hope the best for you, but he's probably upset with you.

I recommend you tell him your true feelings about him, that might make things a little better, tell him all of your feelings about this situation.
Being completely honest may help, people respect that.

[Eric57]

Honestly, that was pretty fucking immature of you.
Just because he didn't feel the same way about you as you did him, doesn't mean you have to be a prick and delete him from your facebook profile.

Not trying to offend you, i'm just being honest.

Imagine if you were in his position, he likes you as a friend, nothing more, so just deal with it.
Try to look at things from HIS point of view.

Maybe if you told him how you feel about him, then he might consider a relationship with you.
But what you did was kinda disrespectful, you might have ruined the friendship you guys had.

I think the only reason you deleted him was because of the heat of the moment, but you should have put more thought into this.
Maybe, you just lost him as a friend, I hope the best for you, but he's probably upset with you.

I recommend you tell him your true feelings about him, that might make things a little better, tell him all of your feelings about this situation.
Being completely honest may help, people respect that.

Didn't offend me at all... because everything you said is exactly how I feel. I feel like I did it in the heat of the moment because I was upset and I didn't really think about it... and I more than likely did ruin whatever chance I had of being friends with him. I literally called him right before I came on here and read this, but he unfortunately didn't answer... and I don't think he will call or text me back, to be honest.

I was planning on telling him exactly how I felt, but now I probably did just ruin it. And again, you didn't offend. Thanks for being honest.

[FreeFall]

Does he want to be friends with you? In the case of a failed relationship and trying to move on, space is usually needed. There is no thinking about the other person's feelings when you have to save your own.

If you never get over him in a romantic sense, your feelings would've killed the friendship.
If you never allow yourself to find a way to move on, you couldn't just have him as a friend.

How is the fire supposed to die when you keep tossing wood in?

What is it you want exactly from a person you doesn't share your feelings?

[Lost in the Echo]

Didn't offend me at all... because everything you said is exactly how I feel. I feel like I did it in the heat of the moment because I was upset and I didn't really think about it... and I more than likely did ruin whatever chance I had of being friends with him. I literally called him right before I came on here and read this, but he unfortunately didn't answer... and I don't think he will call or text me back, to be honest.

I was planning on telling him exactly how I felt, but now I probably did just ruin it. And again, you didn't offend. Thanks for being honest.

Well, he probably still wants to be friends, he probably just needs time to think about the sitiuation, he's probably just upset.

I think it will pass within a couple days though, I think he will forgive you, because of all the shit you guys have been through together.

[Ryhanna]

I don't think that it was immature at all. In fact, I think that deleting him was the mature thing to do.

If seeing his posts on Facebook hurts you, then you have to do something to change that. If you both want to remain friends, then you need time to move on, and seeing each others lives on Facebook every day is not allowing either of you that opportunity.

The important thing for you to remember is that you're not deleting him out of spite, you're deleting him because you're trying to get over your romantic feelings towards him.

I think that sending him a message explaining why you deleted him would be a good idea, though. Just so that he understands.

[FreeFall]

I don't think that it was immature at all. In fact, I think that deleting him was the mature thing to do.

If seeing his posts on Facebook hurts you, then you have to do something to change that. If you both want to remain friends, then you need time to move on, and seeing each others lives on Facebook every day is not allowing either of you that opportunity.

The important thing for you to remember is that you're not deleting him out of spite, you're deleting him because you're trying to get over your romantic feelings towards him.

I think that sending him a message explaining why you deleted him would be a good idea, though. Just so that he understands.
This this this!

If you message him so he understands, do so also for your own piece of mind. So if the case he flips you deleted him, you can at least pat yourself on the back and say you tried. Asking for space is a totally reasonable and mature request.
In my opinion those who cannot respect a person's need for space and have a tantrum over it, are highly immature, selfish and greedy people inconsiderate of other's feelings.
Everyone should understand that some people need a whole bunch of breathing room to get over feelings for a person, even the person in question.

It's not an "Oh I hate you, you hurt my feelings!" type of thing, it's for you. It's you saying the fire's too hot and you'd rather not stand too close to it anymore until you have proper heat protection, aka you're over him.

[Eric57]

Thanks for all the advice everybody.

Honestly, I think I probably screwed things up and made myself look like a crazy mess. I called him the other night because I wanted to talk to him, explain, and lay out all my feelings about everything. That I could really move on. He didn't answer, but texted me back saying he would call me tonight. He didn't call and there could be like a million reasons why, but I felt the need to send him a text. I told him what I wanted to talk to him about and I apologized for acting weird and crazy.

Basically I feel like I am acting like a crazy mess and I just need to quit. I feel like at this point I need to leave him alone because all I am doing is digging myself in a deeper hole and making myself look worse... and probably making it so he doesn't ever want to talk to me again because he thinks I'm crazy.

Obviously I don't know if that is how he feels, but honestly, if I were in his position, that is how I would feel. I don't know. Now that I texted him and everything I feel worse than I did before. Simply because now I know I probably won't get the chance to lay down all my feelings about everything.

Ugh, why do I have to act so crazy?!

[GoldenSnitch]

I don't think that it was immature at all. In fact, I think that deleting him was the mature thing to do.

If seeing his posts on Facebook hurts you, then you have to do something to change that. If you both want to remain friends, then you need time to move on, and seeing each others lives on Facebook every day is not allowing either of you that opportunity.

The important thing for you to remember is that you're not deleting him out of spite, you're deleting him because you're trying to get over your romantic feelings towards him.

I think that sending him a message explaining why you deleted him would be a good idea, though. Just so that he understands.

I agree!

[Eric57]

I just wanted to give an update for those interested. lol

The guy actually did end up calling me back. I left it alone for a few days and he eventually called. I basically let it all out and told him everything I was feeling, including how I felt about him. To make a long story short, he said he still stands by what he said. He told me he doesn't think it was going to work because of our age difference and that it would probably be best to keep him deleted for awhile. But he did say that I wasn't annoying him and that in the future if I ever feel like I can, he'd like it if I could re-add him on Facebook because he'd still love to be friends.

So we are on extremely good terms. It didn't go like I wanted, but I am still happy with the outcome. Ever since we talked I've been feeling good about it. I'm no longer upset or anything. I still have feelings for the guy, but I'm trying to work past them. It definitely helps that I don't see him on Facebook every day and it definitely helps knowing that in the future maybe me and him can be friends.

[FreeFall]

Goodie! You get closure, peace of mind and even encouragement and support from the guy telling you to do what you must to get over him : D

I hope you can be ok soon (: