Why?

[xXJust Jump ItXx]

My cousin, shes a ex cutter... I was talking to her bout my scars, she said because Im ashamed of my scars Im not fully healed. And I shouldnt be ashamed of them. I dont see why not though? I mean I pushed my girlfriend near the breaking point, I have probably permanent scars all over my arm, I cant stand looking at it... Basically everyone seems them! :mad: I hate myself so much cause of what I did! Not to myself but my girlfriend, to others! I hated having to tell my niece cause if I didnt she would see and freak, shes a little younger than me so she understood but I hate them, I hate it! Why would it be wrong to get a cover up tattoo to cover the major ones, why should I not be ashamed?

[Lost in the Echo]

Well I think the reason you're ashamed of your scars is because it reminds you of a rough and depressing part of your life.

Also, everybody is different and self-harm for different reasons, so i'd have to say your cousin is wrong when she says you should be proud of your scars, because for some people it's depressing looking at those scars because it reminds them of why they did it, and thinking about that can be depressing.

You are your own person, if you don't want to show pride in your scars then don't, everyone is different and have different reasoning for why they do what they do :)

Also, just because you're ashamed of your scars doesn't mean you're not fully healed, if you feel like you're passed your days of self-harm and feel like you can deal with your problems without cutting, then you're healed :)
Having pride in your scars has nothing to do with being healed.

[Danny_boi 16]

You must be true to you. You shouldn't be ashamed your you and that's all that matters. The more ashamed you get the more you suffer and still lost in that pit of depression and hate.

“Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” - Jedi Master Yoda

[Noirtier]

I think that it's a matter of how you see things. You're ashamed of your scars because it reminds you of the things you did, the rough times you had, the bad decisions you made, and hurt you may have caused other people. As such, you're ashamed of your scars, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that, really. Your cousin, I think, sees her scars as reminding her that she overcame it, that she beat it, that she won the war. They're a "battle wound" for her if you will, something that she's not ashamed of. I personally don't see anything wrong with either of those things, it's a just a different way that each person views their scars and their past. Just my two cents on it at least.

[LoveMe_HateMe]

I'm ashamed if my scars and I have no problem saying that I am, like others have said, it reminds me if a time that wasn't/isn't good. I hate my scars. Detest them... but scars on my wrist are always covered by bracelets and I'm surprised no one has said anything that I wear them all the time, and ill be getting a tattoo there soonish so I don't always have to wear the bracelets. But the scars on my legs I have to hide them, I have to think carefully about what I'm wearing, just in case their showing.

I'd love to be able to not have to wear bracelets or be able to wear what I want, but I lack that confidence, I wish I had it... but whatever.

At the end of the day you need to do what you feel comfortable doing, if you don't like having them on show - then don't , if you do - great. It shouldn't matter what anyone else says/does its down to you :)

[Jaded Cobalt]

I do not agree with your cousin fully. I do not see it as being proud of what you did, but learning to accept what you've done and use that to always remind yourself of what not to do. You cannot see it since you cannot see my face, but a few centimeters from my right eye is a scar I made myself. I see it in the mirror and I always remember what I did, how I felt then, and I try to use that as a motivation to not feel bad.

[PonY]

I understand if you are ashamed, though you should not be.
I am, ashamed of mine. Every time I look at my girl and feel like an ass because of the way it hurts/hurt her.
Just look at it though, love her more, and remember that you went through a hard time. All that matters is she is with you.

[Conqueror of Hearts]

I get you. I am ashamed of my scars because i am ashamed of what i do and when someone asks me about any scar i make up a story because i dont want anyone to know...people judge and they have prejudice also i dont need their pity or them to talk about me behind my back. I would also like to cover a few of them with a tattoo but my mom doesnt let me (she doesnt know why i want it so badly) . I think that shame can lead to another bad place , so dont be too hard on yourself. People make mistakes all the time,we are all different...cutting will forever be part of you even if there arent any scars. Just try to make them less visible by using lemonjuice...it will take some time but it will do the job. Also good and inspiring tattoo is great idea. And instead of being ashamed be proud that you still alive and that you survived that. You cannot change the past but you can create the future so make sure that your gf knows how much she means to you and just love her and show her that every day.