NEED HELP!!!! (very long post it has a story to it)

[iSwim]

I need some advice even though my predicament isn't very fixable.

I've been with my girlfriend (Tori) for a little bit over a year and we are so happy, her family loves my like I'm there son-in-law. I don't regret a thing, but lately I've been thinking about thus other girl. Hear me out before you exit this post thinking I'm just some manwhore. Let me tell you my story.

I was in a private school all my life, Preschool all the way through to eighth grade. I was always obsessed with finding a girl to love me, but i kept getting hurt so eventually I just gave up.

My freshman year, when I went to public for the first time in my whole life, I met Tori who was absolutely perfect and little did I know she would be my girlfriend a year later. We talked and talked, and the more and more we were attracted to each other. Then out of nowhere she goes out with another guy (when we start dating I find out that she did that because her parents disapproved of me).

So I waited and waited for her until I gave up, I was broken. Then I started to like this girl Amanda who was Tori's best friend, afraid of being hurt again I didn't even try. So I just liked her in secret, but we had classes together in which we were seated beside each other so naturally we talked. We talked about everything, but we were different. Amanda was a country girl and I, a city boy. Nevertheless I started to fall for her.

It was the summer now and I texted her everyday. I wasn't sure if she liked me so I asked one of Amanda's other best friends, Jessica, she said Amanda liked me. I finally felt like I was over Tori and was about to tell Amanda my feelings, when I wake up one day and look on my Facebook news feed, Tori went from "in a relationship" to "single". Sure enough Tori texted me later that day saying she wanted to date me. I couldn't do it not after she broke my heart. So I told Amanda my feelings and she told she didn't like me.

I was so confused so I asked Jessica again if Amanda really liked me and she said yes. I told her what happened and Jessica explained that Tori had been telling Amanda, for months, how much she loved me and she wished she hadn't hurt me and take it all back. I was going to text Amanda to talk about it but for some reason i held back, so we never got to talk about it. So after finding out why Amanda said she didn't like me I asked Tori out and we've been together ever since.

I have no regrets except that me and Amanda's friendship slowly deteriorated until out got to the point we barely ever say a word to each other. Lately me and Tori have been hanging out with Amanda and her new boyfriend she's happy.

It's been making me wonder what things might have been like if Amanda and i had got together. I guess it's just me wanting a little bit of closure.I have so many unresolved feelings for Amanda feelings we never got to express or even get to talk about.

Thank you if you stuck around to actually read the whole thing. Any advice or insight you can give me?

[LouBerry]

That's normal. You, like me, are at the age that it's getting close to time to start thinking about the future and college and settling down. I was with my ex for two years, and I was so happy with him. But I would always think, 'Do I really want him to be the last guy I date ever"? And I started kind of talking to a few other people, nothing wrong just friends, and I ended up falling in love with someone else. It worked out and Seth and I are happy as clams. You might want to try dating someone else for a while, just to make sure she is what you want.

[Noirtier]

Let me use a bit of an analogy here. Imagine life as a room full of books. Each book contains a different person, a different path, a different story. In your life, you get a lot of choices of which books to open, and which books to keep closed. Sometimes, circumstances make a book stay closed. And that's what happened here. The book with Amanda stayed closed, so that the book with Tori could be opened. And sometimes, it's for the better that way. It's something that you'll probably never know what would have happened if you had dated Amanda instead. But you know what? You said that you're happy with Tori and you're in a healthy relationship, and Amanda is happy with her boyfriend. So maybe, it just wasn't meant to be. I know you never got closure with it, but look at how things turned out because of it. Would you really want things any other way for you all? I would still recommend talking about those feelings to someone, whether that be a counselor or a friend, or even Amanda or Tori. And let them know that it was in the past but you're just talking about it to get a bit of closure on it. So that the book can be closed, and you can accept that, and be content with the path that you did choose.

[iSwim95]

I think Noirtier is right. As long as she's happy and you're happy that's all that matters. iSwim and I have similar names. :cool:

[GoldenSnitch]

You are happy. She is happy. Hopefully things will stay that way.