AutumnDae
November 24th, 2012, 08:46 PM
This is extremely long and kind of confusing because you don't know the people involved, except me, but I really just need to type it out and wrap my head around the facts and what is actually going on. My apologies about the length, everyone.
The first time I went to a college party, I went to a fraternity. I got drunk (I am in no way encouraging under-age drinking, however it plays a large role in this tale.) and I was walking out, but lost my friends. The stairs at the house are weird and steep and kind of slippery some times, and one of the brothers helped me up and outside and helped me find my friends. We actually kind of hit it off, and I gave him my number. We texted for a little while that night, and he was so friendly to me, in a genuinely nice person sort of way. His name is Chris.
The next weekend, I went back to the frat again, in hopes of seeing him for a second time and talking to him more, hopefully while I could still form complete sentences and not say anything embarrassing. At first I didn't see him, but I eventually spotted him playing pong and hanging out with a lot of people. I was too shy to say anything, and he didn't see me, so we didn't talk at all.
That night, I met another guy at the frat, who I thought was a brother, but actually wasn't. For reference, he is now a brother of the frat. He and I talked for a while, but in a different way than I talked to the first guy. He made it pretty clear what his intentions were, and that was for us to hook up. After a while, my friends wanted to leave, and I didn't want to be left alone, so I told him I was leaving. He asked for my number, so I gave it to him. We've been talking on a regular basis since that night. He's made it clear that his intentions are that I'm a booty call basically for him. I said I wasn't into that, that he should find another girl, etc, etc. He started trying to get to know me better, and now he drops hints that he actually likes me. And when we first started talking, he said that he did not want a relationship, but a couple of weeks ago he said he was open to one now. I do not have feelings for him, at all. He always asks me to go to the frat to party, to go his dorm room to hook up, why don't I ever go see him, etc, etc. I always have an excuse. His name is Jack.
A few weeks ago, my friends and I didn't have another party to go to, so we went back to his frat. I made a joke on the way there that instead of hanging out with the guy I've been talking to, I would hang out with the first guy that I met, who I thought was cute and wanted to get to know better. Jack knew we were coming, and was outside when we got there. We went down into the basement where the parties are held, and my group kind of spread out a bit. My roommate and I hung out with eachother, and Jack helped us get some drinks. After a while, I started feeling pretty drunk, and had to use the bathroom, and so did my roommate. Jack was with us, and we asked him to take us upstairs to the bathroom.
After we were done, we somehow ended up in one of the bedrooms. Jack, my roommate, and I were just hanging out. My roommate called her boyfriend, Jack and I were just talking. He kept kind of putting his hand on me, on my thigh, my lower back, making it obvious that he wanted to hook up. After a few minutes, I got up and said I wanted to find my other friend. I told Jack to watch my roommate, and I'd be right back.
I walked out and shut the door behind me, and walked into the hallway, and looked over, and who was standing there? None other than Chris! I got really excited, and he seemed so happy to see me too! We hugged and were talking for a few minutes, and then out came my long explanation of so many words. Chris listened, and laughed at it a bit, and then eventually I somehow said I wanted to kiss him? So Chris kissed me, we made out. And then I told him that he couldn't tell Jack, or else he would be mad. He said it would be our secret. Jack ended up opening the door, and was confused so I made up some story and then kind of like ran down the stairs. I ended up not being able to find my other friend, so went back upstairs. Chris texted me to come back downstairs to hang out with him, and I said I'd be there soon.
I went back to the room where Jack and my roommate were, and my roommate was leaving with our friends. Leaving me and Jack alone in the room. I laid down on the bed, and he laid down with me. We ended up making out, and some other stuff happened. I eventually just wasn't really into it anymore, and he stopped, kind of upset, but respectful that I was over it. We went back downstairs, I found my friend, and somehow ended up with Chris on the stairs, sitting and talking, with Jack glaring at us the entire time we were talking. Jack ended up leaving, and Chris and I made sure my friend was okay, and went upstairs.
Chris and I hung out in a bedroom for a while with a few people, sitting in a recliner chair thing together. I was sitting on his lap. Eventually all the people left, and we were alone. We continued talking and fooling around. Sometimes when I drink, I get these fears that I'm bothering the person that I'm talking to, so I basically said "Chris. If you're trying to go to bed or hook up with another girl or just want me to leave, I will. Just let me know I won't even be offended." And he laughed and then said something along the lines of "Yeah I'm pretty tired, I think you should go get your friend and I'll see you soon or something. I'm just going to go to bed." I started to stand up, and he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me back down onto him, and kissed my cheek and said "I'm so sorry! I was kidding! I'm sorry. I was actually just going to ask you if you wanted to stay the night?" I said I would, as long as my friend could stay too because I didn't want her to walk home alone.
We found my friend, and she was going to stay also. Chris and I went into his room and I laid down in his bed, and he got in also after turning off the light. We cuddled and laughed and talked some more. We started kissing again, and then would go back to talking. It was all very comfortable and fun. I expected him to try to make a move and go farther with me, but he didn't. Somewhere along the line, we drifted off to sleep. We woke up mid morning and I got up and gathered my things, and he walked my friend and I to the door and said goodbye. Successful night.
The next Thursday, my friend that and I decided we wanted to go out. Since it was a Thursday there weren't too many parties going on, but I saw on Twitter that his frat was having a party that evening. I texted him and asked if it was okay if we came, since I knew it would be small, and he said definitely. So we got there, and we were right. It was mostly brothers and a few friends of the house. At first it was a little awkward, but I talked and made friends with a lot of the brothers, who all know my name now, ha, and a few girls that were really nice. Luckily, Jack wasn't there that night, otherwise he definitely would have wanted to hang out and hook up.
Chris and I went upstairs after a while, and he asked if I wanted to sleep over again. I agreed but I said that I had to wake up because I had class. I told him I set an alarm but he laughed and said "You're drunk. I mean so am I but I can make sure we have an alarm set so we wake up. Okay. Alarm set. We will wake up but first we go to sleep." We got into bed, and cuddled and talked and kissed again. He found out that I'm extremely ticklish, and he was enjoying tickling me for quite a while. I expected that to turn into something more, but it didn't. Somehow, the topic of having sex while he's drunk came up and he said "I don't have sex with girls when I'm drunk. It's just not something I do. I'm all about the cuddling." and I was pretty happy when he said that.
We fell asleep with his arms around me and my face buried in his chest, but I woke up a while later and rolled over so we were facing the same way. In his sleep, he moved to better fit me and pulled me in close so we were still just as close as before. He eventually woke up, and he thought I was asleep because I was so still. I wanted to see what he would do actually haha. He actually played with my hair for a few minutes, and then he kissed my shoulder/neck lightly and settled back and went to sleep. It was adorable.
When our alarms woke us up, we each turned them off and kind of collected ourselves for a moment. I whispered that I should get up soon, but he pulled me into a hug close to him and said "No...stay for a little while longer. Please?" so I did. We both kind of fell back asleep, and when I got up for real he helped me find all of my items, and then walked me to the door again.
Okay, now that the background is kind of out of the way. Jack doesn't know about Chris and I. But Chris knows about Jack and I. Jack said a week or so ago that he'd be angry if he found out that I hooked up with someone he knows. I didn't say a word. He also found out that I was at his frat without him and he was kind of upset about that but I played it off.
Basically, the house is small enough that Jack will know I'm there every single time. I don't know how to kind of tell him that I'm not interested in hanging out with him, and that I want to hang out with his frat brother. There's really no good way. But I want to see where things go with Chris because he's such a nice guy. And I know he's not trying to just have sex with me.
Blergh. Kind of just needed to vent, this is so long, sorry, haha.
The first time I went to a college party, I went to a fraternity. I got drunk (I am in no way encouraging under-age drinking, however it plays a large role in this tale.) and I was walking out, but lost my friends. The stairs at the house are weird and steep and kind of slippery some times, and one of the brothers helped me up and outside and helped me find my friends. We actually kind of hit it off, and I gave him my number. We texted for a little while that night, and he was so friendly to me, in a genuinely nice person sort of way. His name is Chris.
The next weekend, I went back to the frat again, in hopes of seeing him for a second time and talking to him more, hopefully while I could still form complete sentences and not say anything embarrassing. At first I didn't see him, but I eventually spotted him playing pong and hanging out with a lot of people. I was too shy to say anything, and he didn't see me, so we didn't talk at all.
That night, I met another guy at the frat, who I thought was a brother, but actually wasn't. For reference, he is now a brother of the frat. He and I talked for a while, but in a different way than I talked to the first guy. He made it pretty clear what his intentions were, and that was for us to hook up. After a while, my friends wanted to leave, and I didn't want to be left alone, so I told him I was leaving. He asked for my number, so I gave it to him. We've been talking on a regular basis since that night. He's made it clear that his intentions are that I'm a booty call basically for him. I said I wasn't into that, that he should find another girl, etc, etc. He started trying to get to know me better, and now he drops hints that he actually likes me. And when we first started talking, he said that he did not want a relationship, but a couple of weeks ago he said he was open to one now. I do not have feelings for him, at all. He always asks me to go to the frat to party, to go his dorm room to hook up, why don't I ever go see him, etc, etc. I always have an excuse. His name is Jack.
A few weeks ago, my friends and I didn't have another party to go to, so we went back to his frat. I made a joke on the way there that instead of hanging out with the guy I've been talking to, I would hang out with the first guy that I met, who I thought was cute and wanted to get to know better. Jack knew we were coming, and was outside when we got there. We went down into the basement where the parties are held, and my group kind of spread out a bit. My roommate and I hung out with eachother, and Jack helped us get some drinks. After a while, I started feeling pretty drunk, and had to use the bathroom, and so did my roommate. Jack was with us, and we asked him to take us upstairs to the bathroom.
After we were done, we somehow ended up in one of the bedrooms. Jack, my roommate, and I were just hanging out. My roommate called her boyfriend, Jack and I were just talking. He kept kind of putting his hand on me, on my thigh, my lower back, making it obvious that he wanted to hook up. After a few minutes, I got up and said I wanted to find my other friend. I told Jack to watch my roommate, and I'd be right back.
I walked out and shut the door behind me, and walked into the hallway, and looked over, and who was standing there? None other than Chris! I got really excited, and he seemed so happy to see me too! We hugged and were talking for a few minutes, and then out came my long explanation of so many words. Chris listened, and laughed at it a bit, and then eventually I somehow said I wanted to kiss him? So Chris kissed me, we made out. And then I told him that he couldn't tell Jack, or else he would be mad. He said it would be our secret. Jack ended up opening the door, and was confused so I made up some story and then kind of like ran down the stairs. I ended up not being able to find my other friend, so went back upstairs. Chris texted me to come back downstairs to hang out with him, and I said I'd be there soon.
I went back to the room where Jack and my roommate were, and my roommate was leaving with our friends. Leaving me and Jack alone in the room. I laid down on the bed, and he laid down with me. We ended up making out, and some other stuff happened. I eventually just wasn't really into it anymore, and he stopped, kind of upset, but respectful that I was over it. We went back downstairs, I found my friend, and somehow ended up with Chris on the stairs, sitting and talking, with Jack glaring at us the entire time we were talking. Jack ended up leaving, and Chris and I made sure my friend was okay, and went upstairs.
Chris and I hung out in a bedroom for a while with a few people, sitting in a recliner chair thing together. I was sitting on his lap. Eventually all the people left, and we were alone. We continued talking and fooling around. Sometimes when I drink, I get these fears that I'm bothering the person that I'm talking to, so I basically said "Chris. If you're trying to go to bed or hook up with another girl or just want me to leave, I will. Just let me know I won't even be offended." And he laughed and then said something along the lines of "Yeah I'm pretty tired, I think you should go get your friend and I'll see you soon or something. I'm just going to go to bed." I started to stand up, and he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me back down onto him, and kissed my cheek and said "I'm so sorry! I was kidding! I'm sorry. I was actually just going to ask you if you wanted to stay the night?" I said I would, as long as my friend could stay too because I didn't want her to walk home alone.
We found my friend, and she was going to stay also. Chris and I went into his room and I laid down in his bed, and he got in also after turning off the light. We cuddled and laughed and talked some more. We started kissing again, and then would go back to talking. It was all very comfortable and fun. I expected him to try to make a move and go farther with me, but he didn't. Somewhere along the line, we drifted off to sleep. We woke up mid morning and I got up and gathered my things, and he walked my friend and I to the door and said goodbye. Successful night.
The next Thursday, my friend that and I decided we wanted to go out. Since it was a Thursday there weren't too many parties going on, but I saw on Twitter that his frat was having a party that evening. I texted him and asked if it was okay if we came, since I knew it would be small, and he said definitely. So we got there, and we were right. It was mostly brothers and a few friends of the house. At first it was a little awkward, but I talked and made friends with a lot of the brothers, who all know my name now, ha, and a few girls that were really nice. Luckily, Jack wasn't there that night, otherwise he definitely would have wanted to hang out and hook up.
Chris and I went upstairs after a while, and he asked if I wanted to sleep over again. I agreed but I said that I had to wake up because I had class. I told him I set an alarm but he laughed and said "You're drunk. I mean so am I but I can make sure we have an alarm set so we wake up. Okay. Alarm set. We will wake up but first we go to sleep." We got into bed, and cuddled and talked and kissed again. He found out that I'm extremely ticklish, and he was enjoying tickling me for quite a while. I expected that to turn into something more, but it didn't. Somehow, the topic of having sex while he's drunk came up and he said "I don't have sex with girls when I'm drunk. It's just not something I do. I'm all about the cuddling." and I was pretty happy when he said that.
We fell asleep with his arms around me and my face buried in his chest, but I woke up a while later and rolled over so we were facing the same way. In his sleep, he moved to better fit me and pulled me in close so we were still just as close as before. He eventually woke up, and he thought I was asleep because I was so still. I wanted to see what he would do actually haha. He actually played with my hair for a few minutes, and then he kissed my shoulder/neck lightly and settled back and went to sleep. It was adorable.
When our alarms woke us up, we each turned them off and kind of collected ourselves for a moment. I whispered that I should get up soon, but he pulled me into a hug close to him and said "No...stay for a little while longer. Please?" so I did. We both kind of fell back asleep, and when I got up for real he helped me find all of my items, and then walked me to the door again.
Okay, now that the background is kind of out of the way. Jack doesn't know about Chris and I. But Chris knows about Jack and I. Jack said a week or so ago that he'd be angry if he found out that I hooked up with someone he knows. I didn't say a word. He also found out that I was at his frat without him and he was kind of upset about that but I played it off.
Basically, the house is small enough that Jack will know I'm there every single time. I don't know how to kind of tell him that I'm not interested in hanging out with him, and that I want to hang out with his frat brother. There's really no good way. But I want to see where things go with Chris because he's such a nice guy. And I know he's not trying to just have sex with me.
Blergh. Kind of just needed to vent, this is so long, sorry, haha.