Coming out?

[Axw_JD]

As if things weren't pretty bad right now... I don't really have many friends. In fact, as recent events strongly suggest, I only really have 1 and he is the best friend I've ever had (which tbh isn't a very luxurious title, it just takes not bullying me to win that title. But he is in some ways a lot more than just the first person ever to spend time with me on a regular basis without bullying me on a regular basis).

The thing is I really want to come out to him, I feel like I owe him to be as open as I can, but I am way too scared of what will happen. First and foremost no, I don't have romantic feelings for him. He means the world to me but in a completely different way. Its hard to explain, but is very clear to me. His friendship is pretty much the only reason I haven't taken my life yet.

I don't really know what he thinks about the topic, as I am too afraid of bringing it up. And as I stated above, no I can't really just "tell him and if he doesn't accept me he isn't a real friend". I know that will push me over the edge, I now that is something I can't live with. Yet again, not telling him isn't really an option.

I guess what I need most is ideas on how to approach the subject. I need to tell him, and I need to do it soon.

[FergusDunn]

I think the best way forward is to sort of sound him out - try and see what he feels about gay guys - its hard mostly as ids we can just echo how/what parents say -

But its not telling him - its after - if he like gets angry or upset then what.

So I would maybe try and avoid that by write him a note - just say whats on your mind and he can read it at home maybe -

Its not a cope out thing it just avoids mabey him being upset and you guys saying stuff you dont mean - makeing it all worse.

Thats what I think - but hope you get more advice

I have a gay mate he is out to afew people my family - he was really worried we would just leave him - bey we did not - he is a good friend.

Hope it goes ok

[Axw_JD]

I don't want to be too impersonal... I wanna be able to be in front of him and answer any questions he might have if any... or if he wants to beat the crap out of me for being a fag... one way or another, I would rather do it in person.

But there's also the problem of how and when... I thought about some time when we eat out somewhere (we usually go and eat somewhere once every other week just to have fun away from school and stuff). I love that. I don't want him to think that it is anything other than friends having dinner. I don't want him to think it is a date for me or anything... I kinda want to just go get dinner somewhere and pay for both as a nice gesture (just in case he doesn't take the news all too well) but I am afraid it would just make it worse).

[Matt_2012]

Just make it clear that you don't have feelings for him. Also if he has any questions you'd be happy to answer them. Ive only been sober once with all the times I've come out to mates haha, not suggesting to do that but yeah.

Goodluck :)

[Foamy]

Wait until the timing is right. Whether you two are just talking or watching a movie that has stuff about this, use his reaction about the topic as a factor about if you should come out to him.

[alexkun]

i know what you mean... its something really hard to do... my family doesnt know im bi.. and i dont plan to tell them anytime soon.. because i know they are not going to take it very well at all... i grew up in a christian home.. and christian values are so strong in my house that im afraid of their reaction.. and what they could do to try to "fix me".. as if i was sick or broken..

... im so glad i found this website.. i feel so relieved when i write my mind here.. it made me realize there's so many people like me.. going though the same things i am.. .. :D