PrimedPenguin
November 22nd, 2012, 09:12 PM
Well here it is its currently at 661 words and I'm not even through the back Storie yet. Please give me advice or suggestions.
Its*4:32 AM*in the*desert that sits on the far outskirts of Las Vages. The*desert*was dark and quiet compared to the bright noisey*aura that surrounds its*hustling bussling niegbor. It is warm and the*air has a faint smell of fresh dew**from*the rain that*fell a couple of hours*prior to this current moment.*The countryside is flat and barren except for the occasional mound of sand and the even less occasional mountain.
In the middle of this sea of sand lays a long winding dirt road that runs through the desert similar to how a snake would. The path is rarely traveled and many would never know of its existence if they were never told.
Today was different, today there was a van parked in the side of this road. Surrounding this obscure van were four tents and a fire pit constructed out of rocks found in the sand. The camps occupants had been up since 10 AM partying, and they all were extremely tired. Music flooded the campground and there was a strong wift of smoke in the air.
These 8 rowdy campers were unaware of the shambling figure that made its way down the road slowly with a gainted limp. This figure slowly trudged towards the group. Its face had long since rotted away leaving only its gray skull and hints a rotting flesh covered in blood. It wore a faded torn bright yellow jumpsuit that was covered in blood from its recent victim. The figure confronted one of the parties. His name was Jonathan Horowitz and he had recently just been laid off from his job as a architect and was looking for a way to get his current predicament off his mind. When the figure in the jumpsuit confronted Johnathan John was reluctant to notice the bloody face of the figure that stood before him behind the haze that was caused by Johnathan offered the figure a bottle of Coca-cola that he had recently been drinking out of. The figure responded by lunging toward taking a large bite of the bottle causing the beverage to spill out. As the figure crunched down in the glass small drops of soda slowly dripped down the throat of this abomination. Instantly the particles of soda began its quick journey up to the brain. The particles of Coca-Cola began to excite the abnormal neurons in the brain jumpstarting the brains moter functions that had long since deteriorated away. The figure jumped toward knocking over the ex-architect. The figure lifted its head up and dug its teeth straight in to the neck of its victim. Jonathan began to scream and roll alerting his fellow partygoers of the new danger. The entourage of parties began to join in the screamfest and ran throughout the campsite. Johnathan managed to grab a rock off the ground and struck his attacker in the head. This blow caused the attacker to release its grip and fall off of its victim. Johnathan clutched his throat in an attemp to stop the bleeding but he had already lost to much blood for it painted the sand below him. He fell to the ground and took his last breath before he closed his eyes and felt the last beat of his heart.
The figure slowly fumbled his way up. After he had retrieved his original standing position he began to stumble foward in a surprisingly quick pace towards his second victim, a middle aged woman named Kelly Marlins. She had came to this place with her best friend every weekend for the last 5 weeks it was almost like a religion to her.
Its*4:32 AM*in the*desert that sits on the far outskirts of Las Vages. The*desert*was dark and quiet compared to the bright noisey*aura that surrounds its*hustling bussling niegbor. It is warm and the*air has a faint smell of fresh dew**from*the rain that*fell a couple of hours*prior to this current moment.*The countryside is flat and barren except for the occasional mound of sand and the even less occasional mountain.
In the middle of this sea of sand lays a long winding dirt road that runs through the desert similar to how a snake would. The path is rarely traveled and many would never know of its existence if they were never told.
Today was different, today there was a van parked in the side of this road. Surrounding this obscure van were four tents and a fire pit constructed out of rocks found in the sand. The camps occupants had been up since 10 AM partying, and they all were extremely tired. Music flooded the campground and there was a strong wift of smoke in the air.
These 8 rowdy campers were unaware of the shambling figure that made its way down the road slowly with a gainted limp. This figure slowly trudged towards the group. Its face had long since rotted away leaving only its gray skull and hints a rotting flesh covered in blood. It wore a faded torn bright yellow jumpsuit that was covered in blood from its recent victim. The figure confronted one of the parties. His name was Jonathan Horowitz and he had recently just been laid off from his job as a architect and was looking for a way to get his current predicament off his mind. When the figure in the jumpsuit confronted Johnathan John was reluctant to notice the bloody face of the figure that stood before him behind the haze that was caused by Johnathan offered the figure a bottle of Coca-cola that he had recently been drinking out of. The figure responded by lunging toward taking a large bite of the bottle causing the beverage to spill out. As the figure crunched down in the glass small drops of soda slowly dripped down the throat of this abomination. Instantly the particles of soda began its quick journey up to the brain. The particles of Coca-Cola began to excite the abnormal neurons in the brain jumpstarting the brains moter functions that had long since deteriorated away. The figure jumped toward knocking over the ex-architect. The figure lifted its head up and dug its teeth straight in to the neck of its victim. Jonathan began to scream and roll alerting his fellow partygoers of the new danger. The entourage of parties began to join in the screamfest and ran throughout the campsite. Johnathan managed to grab a rock off the ground and struck his attacker in the head. This blow caused the attacker to release its grip and fall off of its victim. Johnathan clutched his throat in an attemp to stop the bleeding but he had already lost to much blood for it painted the sand below him. He fell to the ground and took his last breath before he closed his eyes and felt the last beat of his heart.
The figure slowly fumbled his way up. After he had retrieved his original standing position he began to stumble foward in a surprisingly quick pace towards his second victim, a middle aged woman named Kelly Marlins. She had came to this place with her best friend every weekend for the last 5 weeks it was almost like a religion to her.