I don't really know what I am..

[Skorupski]

Okay so for the longest time I have identified as bisexual. Though I have only ever been sexually attracted to men. I have only ever watched gay pornography. So when I had a boyfriend, I couldn't be with him emotionally. But when we tried to be together sexually, I couldn't do anything. I realized I wa only attracted to the porn. So I went out with a girl. I have never been sexually attracted to a girl. I have always been able to emotionally connect with women. But in the relationship I couldn't see her as anything more than a friend. Over the years I have realized that I am neither romantically or physically attracted to women either. So I feel as If I am asexual. Because in my experience I have never been physically or mentally attracted to anyone. I just want to hear other people's thoughts..

[TigerBoy]

Some people genuinely are asexual, however if you are getting off on porn you clearly have a sexual interest in something so that would rule that out to my mind.

Sexual arousal is very mental. Sounds like you weren't really into the guy you did try stuff with at any level, it could have just been nerves, or it could be your background is very disapproving of gays and that's holding you back.

I suspect the issue could be you simply haven't met a guy you really like or felt comfortable with. I'd suggest taking it slow and really getting to know a guy before you take it to the bedroom, that way you'll know if you genuinely like them and you'll be more comfortable with the whole experience.

There is also a danger with some kinds of porn that you'll have unrealistic expectations of the average guy. If you've been watching a lot of gym-buff guys you could try mixing in more amateur stuff and widen your tastes a bit.

[Twilly F. Sniper]

Likely thing is, you haven't met someone you exactly feel comfortable with yet.

[Discomposure]

As its already been said, it seems like you need to just wait it out until you meet someone who you really feel right with. Then things will make sense!
In the mean time, don't let yourself get all worried and confused as to what your sexuality is because its not worth letting it get to you.

[Skorupski]

Some people genuinely are asexual, however if you are getting off on porn you clearly have a sexual interest in something so that would rule that out to my mind.



See that would make sense. The thing is, that doesn't get me off. I watch it because I can see that the guys are attractive, but I've never felt anything more than that.

[TigerBoy]

See that would make sense. The thing is, that doesn't get me off. I watch it because I can see that the guys are attractive, but I've never felt anything more than that.

So are you saying you are watching them because the guys are pretty but you aren't aroused by it? If there is no sexual component, why watch guys and not girls?

[Skorupski]

So are you saying you are watching them because the guys are pretty but you aren't aroused by it? If there is no sexual component, why watch guys and not girls?

Kind of. I used to watch girls and every once in a while I still do, it's just that I watch guys most. I don't know maybe it's because I'm a guy and it's more comfortable for me to watch someone with the same "parts" as me.

[TigerBoy]

Kind of. I used to watch girls and every once in a while I still do, it's just that I watch guys most. I don't know maybe it's because I'm a guy and it's more comfortable for me to watch someone with the same "parts" as me.

Ok but in your first post you said you've only been sexually attracted to guys, so that made it sound like there's more to it than that?

It may just be that you don't have a very high sex drive and so it isn't so important to you. If so, you could count it as a blessing (a lot of guys do all their thinking 'down there'), or you could consider talking to a doctor who may look at things like hormone levels etc and help you out if you want it.

[Skorupski]

Ok but in your first post you said you've only been sexually attracted to guys, so that made it sound like there's more to it than that?

It may just be that you don't have a very high sex drive and so it isn't so important to you. If so, you could count it as a blessing (a lot of guys do all their thinking 'down there'), or you could consider talking to a doctor who may look at things like hormone levels etc and help you out if you want it.

I know I made it sound like that, because I may have been thinking that I was because I watched it more with no arousal. Thank you though for answering and helping!

[FergusDunn]

Ok this is how you feel now but maybe if you met the right person you would feel differanlty

Maybe you juts need time and people around you who understand

but that would mean you being able to talk about how you feel.

[alexkun]

sorry dude.. I've never felt that way... i think maybe you just have to find the right person.. that's all... try to look for a little longer.. and you'll see.. i don't really think humans can be asexual.. it just doesn't make sense to me.. but that's just the way i think.. i respect your believes of course

[teen.jpg]

Sometimes it's not the gender, but the person.

[Caver]

I think you need to be good friends with them a lot, it obviously takes you a lot to fancy/be attracted to someone. Just give it time and don't rush.

[qwertygirl]

i know this thread is kind of dry, but whatever...
ANYWAY, I understand completely what you mean. Porn is very visual. And it is very different to watch two people have sex than to have it yourself. I personally can't even bring myself to an orgasm without clasping my legs together and squeezing them (don't ask i don't even know how that works)... so anyway I feel your pain, but maybe you could try to fantasize while masturbating. It would help you more with envisioning yourself having sex rather than envisioning two random people having sex. Hope this helped at all haha!

[Jakejjj]

Don't worry you have your whole life ahead of you just live life for know

[Seattle-WA-Roxx]

Im from Seattle too! But I Think you might just be Bi-Curious at the moment. I however do Not think ur gay.

[Eth_94123]

Hmmm ... Maybe you are asexual or like other people have said maybe it just takes you alot to like a person! :)