What to do?

[DarkMatter]

First of all, I'm diagnosed with schizophrenia. I was diagnosed nearly two years ago. After attending hospital and being put on medication, I began to feel better and see an improvement in myself. But now, I'm starting to think I'm slipping back.

I got depressed, really depressed - to the point of being suicidal. When I got depressed I would look for anything that could take my mind of how I was feeling. So eventually one thing led to another, and I started to become really religious. Don't get me wrong, being religious isn't a bad thing, but I was taking it to an extreme - becoming obsessed with it. I found for a while, I would feel better again. But then I would get depressed again, and soon thought that God was punishing me for having doubts about his existence.

These religious obsessions would come and go, but when they came I would talk to voices in my head. The voices would tell comfort me, but tell me I better get back to being religious.

Now, I don't know what to do. At the moment, I feel fine, but I know it's only a matter of time before I become religious again and start hearing those voices.

[Shaka]

First off: I do not know completely how to deal with this as I myself have long, long history of spiritual and esoteric terror, guilt, and seething, but, I do know that the most transcendental and real thing often come up psychologically from physical imbalances in the chakras, these are more or less buried in the emotions that we have.

Keep correcting your path as you need and stay true to your most innocent, most compassionate, most intent state of being. What you experience in a dream is just like waking life, when we stray from the line of inner bliss and into the hands of guilt, fear and accusations,then we fall pray to all the antagonistic gremlins of consciousness that we call demons.
-If your voices help you, then learn to use their help and realign yourself without breaking through to doubts.
-Try to find that happy medium to life where your spiritual awareness can coexist with your daily life, and do not feed the Gremlins!

Good luck to you, from a fellow schizotypal: with love.