I never wanted this....it's too much

[Jimmy Page]

I can't take this anymore
The hallucinations are driving me insane,I'm not sure what's real and what's fantasy anymore,everything is just going downwards and it's all my fault
I'm lonely because nobody wants to give my a chance because I'm ugly as fuck and due to my HIV,which is my own fault because I got it from some random guy
My hallucinations are probably caused by drug abuse(which needless to say is my own fault)
I'm always left outside of things,I always get to hear that people do things together without me being asked to join in or anything,which is because I'm a bad friend
I just don't know what to do anymore,it's all getting too much,I've fucked everything up so bad that I won't ever be able to get up again :(

[xXoblivionXx]

You're a great guy Ian. You may have made some bad decisions but that's not what defines you. You are not ugly. In fact, you are rather good looking. It's really hard to know what to do sometimes but you need to keep trying because things will get better as long as you keep trying. :hug3: I'm here for you if you want to talk.