Jaeie
November 2nd, 2012, 10:59 PM
I have depression and ADD, my depression is only getting worse.
I have had a best friend for five years who was like my literal soul mate. We did everything together, we understood each other more than any body in the world. I can't even describe how close we were. We were practically co-dependent, always together.
Six months ago I got a boyfriend for the first time in two years (and all my previous boyfriends had been short-lived flings). He's been my life since then, and since the day we got together, the hole between me and my best friend has grown.
For the past week we have been fighting like crazy, and yesterday I told her how I was almost raped by my other best friend the week before. I was on the phone with her, and I was sobbing, because I had planned not to tell anymore and was scared. I told her "If we can't stop fighting, and if you won't stand by my side and be my friend, then lets not be friends at all". She was talking about calling the police so I threatened her with telling the police about her abuse. It was a cheap shot, but I was scared and panicking.
She told me after she hung up on me that we shouldn't be friends anymore.
Today, when I tried to apologize and make things better, she said "We really need a break. I don't want to talk anymore."
This is the worst break up I've ever had, and I don't know what to do. I'm spiraling out of control.
TL;DR: Im depressed and going through a traumatizing ordeal. My best friend in the world chose her other friends over me and abandoned me. I'm kind of lost without her, she was my world.
I have had a best friend for five years who was like my literal soul mate. We did everything together, we understood each other more than any body in the world. I can't even describe how close we were. We were practically co-dependent, always together.
Six months ago I got a boyfriend for the first time in two years (and all my previous boyfriends had been short-lived flings). He's been my life since then, and since the day we got together, the hole between me and my best friend has grown.
For the past week we have been fighting like crazy, and yesterday I told her how I was almost raped by my other best friend the week before. I was on the phone with her, and I was sobbing, because I had planned not to tell anymore and was scared. I told her "If we can't stop fighting, and if you won't stand by my side and be my friend, then lets not be friends at all". She was talking about calling the police so I threatened her with telling the police about her abuse. It was a cheap shot, but I was scared and panicking.
She told me after she hung up on me that we shouldn't be friends anymore.
Today, when I tried to apologize and make things better, she said "We really need a break. I don't want to talk anymore."
This is the worst break up I've ever had, and I don't know what to do. I'm spiraling out of control.
TL;DR: Im depressed and going through a traumatizing ordeal. My best friend in the world chose her other friends over me and abandoned me. I'm kind of lost without her, she was my world.