Right time to have Sex?

[Wisconsin]

I've been dating this amazing girl for a little over a month now and tho we joke around about sex all the time, I'm not sure as to when the correct time to have sex is. I'm 16, and she's 14, and yeah I'm aware of the age difference, and I'm fiercely determined she stays a virgin until she's at least almost or already 16 because then we'll have about 4 months until I'm 18. I don't want her to be one of those girls where we break up over a simple misunderstanding like last time. Our friends joke saying if we have sex before THIS christmas, they are going to cut off my balls. My gf has no problem with BJs as long as I eat fruit...for obvious reasons as long as you understand :whoops: but againn our friends said the same thing. I do know its not their choice but I also know that I don't want her to do something she doesn't want to do or isn't ready for. When is the correct time or is there even a correct time?
Btw: her parents have no problem with us having sex as long as we use protection and are responsible and tell them we are sexually active. However; my mother would probably do the same as her friends.

[Dawn01]

You want to have sex and you think you are ready, and if she wants to have it too and she thinks that she's ready, I think you too should have sex, because this is the right time! Ok, she is kinda young, but if she feels like she is ready for sex, then you can do it!

Just don't forget about protection, it's really very important! ;)

[FreeFall]

Ok, while I admire your determination to keep her a virgin, pure and happy for her safety, it's not really your place. Just accept it when she is ready, when you're both ready.

Also, are you telling your friends she's giving you blowjobs? Your sex life is between you and your girl, stop spreading the info if this is the case. If not, your friends need to stop seeing her as this tiny little girl incapable of making up her own mind in need of protection and projecting you as some sexual fiend, joking or not. It's not their relationship, ugh, pet peeve of mine :)

You two have only been together for a month, that honestly doesn't matter too much in this case. I lost my virginity at 3 months into my relationship, and a year and 3 months later we're still strong.
How well do you know her? Can you tell what she's feeling from her mannerisms, is she still a mystery to you? Knowing her very well let's you know when she's ready for sex and when she's completely comfortable in doing something. You seem unsure, and that's very natural, very good to be concerned about her and her priorities, so maybe you need to spend more time knowing each other as boyfriend and girlfriend.

In the end, when you're both ready and certain and doing it for the right reasons, go ahead. Just be sure you both understand the emotional affects it will have, and of course, protection (:
I wish you the best!

[Wisconsin]

Lol I wasn't very clear on the BJ thing..she hasn't yet but she told me she was fine with it if I should ever ask or w/e...even tho I would feel uncomfortable asking :whoops: and I do know her really well. Well enough to know her body language and if she's lying to me or not (she's a bad liar lol) but her friends just think that because of the age difference and how long we've been dating, that they deem her unready. Even tho one of her friends had sex a week into one of her most recent relationships (she's had many in the past month) but thanks for the help guys :) it helped

[Abyssal Echo]

no need to rush into it dude. theres no time table. do it when you two feel youre ready. play safe and ware a condom

[Wisconsin]

I'm completely secure and determined to wear a condom ty lol I don't want kids before I even get into college. XD

[Noirtier]

Now, I would like to bring up something that no one else has at this point. The age of consent. Yeah, I know that people ignore the age of consent all the time, but with your age difference it leads to a very sticky situation. The age of consent (meaning the LEGAL age someone can have sex) in Illinois is 17 years old. The reason I mention this is because I looked it up online, and this is what part of the legal system of Illinois says:

(720 ILCS 5/12-15) Sec. 12-15. Criminal sexual abuse. ...(c) The accused commits criminal sexual abuse if he or she commits an act of sexual penetration or sexual conduct with a victim who was at least 13 years of age but under 17 years of age and the accused was less than 5 years older than the victim.

Because of the age difference, if you have sex with her before she is 17, it is legally classified (whether consensual or not) as criminal sexual abuse, and is an act that one can be placed in jail for if something happens--say a bitter breakup, or an upset mother, etc. Yes, you two should wait until you both feel you're ready to have sex, don't get me wrong, I feel the same way. But, you do need to be aware of the laws in your state because, quite frankly, the legal system can be finicky to put it mildly. I wish you both the best of luck in your relationship though!

[Wesley1369]

just use condoms, if its something you both really wanna do. if it is, GO FOR IT just take it slow

[Athlete15]

You're going to know when your body is ready, and seeing as you know her very well and have said you are adapt at reading her body language you will know when she's ready too, which I am sure she will also tell you. Its nice to please your girl's friends, and I understand that, but at the same time they have absolutely no say in when you guys decide to have sex.

To reiterate for the millionth time always wear a condom. You said you would but hearing it over and over can only help. I hope your first time is everything that you want and more :)

[codyandkrista]

I think you should wait. I had sex with my boyfriend two months into the relationship and it made things awkward for a month or so, because we were both virgins and neither of us were completely comfortable with each other yet. Today is our 11 months and things are no longer akward. Although I was 13 going on 14. Yes I was VERY young. And if I could take it back I would, if me and him were to brake up I would be devastated, because I gave it to a Guy I dated for a only short time and at a Hella young age. If your girlfriend is completely comfortable with it make sure you do it safe. That is another problem I had. Good luck.

[PinkFloyd]

If both of you are physically and emotionally ready then why not? Just please use protection.

[DerBear]

I am not going to re-hash everything everyone else has said both legal and common sense.

However if you really have to ask then I don't think you or your girlfriend are mature enough to have sexual intercourse.

Personally because of the age gap I wouldn't as you are technically and adult depending on your country/state and she is still a minor. This could lead to a lot of trouble.

[Kait-11]

I'm going to be straight forward, wait until she is 16, a 14 year old isn't ready for sex, they just say they are to please the guy, but the right time is when you are willing to accept the consequences, like if a condom failed and she got pregnant, if it's right you guys will accept it and know the consequences and not think oh that won't happen to us because it's happens to hundreds