Quitting is hard!

[Megson]

I've made it 14 days without self harming so far. No cutting or biting or scratching or hair-pulling or anything. I haven't even used the rubber-band trick so far because I feel like that's borderline self-harm.

But this is HARD! I've done it before. The most days I made it SH free was over 80, I think. It was easy then. Why is it suddenly harder? I want to cut for no reason at all these days. I literally have zero excuses to cut right now. I want to make it until Christmas, which is about 55 days away.

55 feels like a huge number right now.

Also, I miss my scars. My oldest ones from forever ago are barely noticable now, and my newer ones are already fading. Call me crazy, but I love my scars. I want to make more before they all fade away. But WHY? It makes no sense....

I guess I just wanted to rant. I have no where else to say these things, so I like to come here. Advice is much appreciated.

[workingatperfect]

I'm kind of the same way at time. I have reason to cut right now, none at all, I'm very happy with my life. But sometimes I just want to, I feel like I need to, for no real reason except maybe missing it. It's like a nostalgic feeling for me. I quite before too and it was pretty easy, despite all the stress I had at the time. Now that my life has calmed down it's harder to quit, it's weird, I definitely get where you're coming from. And I feel similar about the scars, except it's more wanting to see the fresh cuts.

I'm not really sure what to tell you. When I get those random urges that don't really make sense, I basically just think about the reason I quit in the first place. For me, I think about how much it hurts my boyfriend to see me doing this to myself. I also keep telling myself that I'm ok and that there's no reason to and I need to move on from that part of my life. Try to think about how you'll feel when you make it to Christmas, how proud and strong that will make you. Also, 55 can seem like a lot, maybe aim for Thanksgiving right now, and once you make it there, go for Christmas. It's easier to do when you break it up, and when you reach that goal you'll feel better and making it to Christmas will be easier.

Stay strong :hug: