21 Year old with a 17 year old

[Thylacine]

I am soon to be 17, the guy I like is soon to be 21. He is the nicest, kindest person ever. I really want to get to know him better and maybe date him. But is that even socially acceptable? If we use the half your age plus 7 rule i would need to be 17 and a half for it to be ok. But how does 6 months makes the relationship anymore ok. I am really conflicted. On one side I genuinely like the guy, however I feel really ill at ease at the whole situation. One of my friends called it disgusting, said he only wants my dick, and that he's a paedo. Another told me to go for it, and that the age difference is fine. I am not a very confident person, and all this is really tearing me up. Please help :'(

[Harry Smith]

I always believe that you should just use common sense with age. The 4 year age gap really isn't that much. It's just because at our age everything is divided by our age. I mean you have classes with people your own age and you hang around with people your own age but you'll find that when your 25 you will work and hang around with people who are older or younger. However I can understand that this is troubling you, try and talk to the person about it. You could try just talking about it in a joking wayif you're not to confident. The most important thing is that you have found someone who could make you happy. Hope this helps- Harry x

[SimSailorNick]

Age doesn't matter as long as you're both open to the idea and no one is uncomfortable with it.

[xStar64]

Well I guess it depends. I honestly don't think age is an issue here. And forget what others think if you like this guy get to know him. Maybe go for a walk together? I'm not an expert but it sounds like being good friends is a good start. Then once he really trusts and confides in you, tell him that he is a good person to hang with, and that you would like to maybe take it further.
Good luck!
-ps. cuddling ALWAYS helps LOL
:cuddle:

[abc_de]

its only a difference of 4 years,
if you feel comfortable with that guy, and you think he is the right guy
then why not go for it?

[Lost in the Echo]

I think you should go for it! Fuck what society says!

I think society controls people to much, yeah to a certain extent that could be a good thing, but I think in your case, if you really do love him and you think he's the one for you, then go for it. It is legal for you 2 to be together, just not sexually active. So I think you should be with him, it seems like you guys love each other, so if you want to be with him, go ahead. Fuck society, you can't help it, who you love is you love.

[nice]

It's not really a big age gap so it doesn't matter there are plenty of people out three who date people younger or older than them.

And if you guys are in the us depending on where you are you are past the age of consent law and no one can try to stop you guys.

[TigerBoy]

I think its absolutely fine. As long as you both want the relationship it isn't anyone else's business.

People who 'don't get it' are missing the point about the dynamics of relationships: they aren't always about 'equals', they often work precisely because of the differences in personality, dominance, age etc. A lot of guys (and girls) like the older guy thing not just for sexual reasons but many practical ones too (experience, wisdom, financial stability) and emotionally many people like the implied strength and support an older partner can give. The younger person can give a lot back, not just the physical attraction of being younger but by simply being the person they can protect and take care of and stuff.

The above is a generalisation of course: I'm the older by two years in my relationship and my boyfriend tends to be the one who is more outwardly dominant: it works for our personalities just fine, and again isn't anyone else's business.

[Mirage]

Age doesn't matter as long as you're both open to the idea and no one is uncomfortable with it.

This. Just go for it, who cares what society thinks? If you're happy, and he's happy, then it's okay in my eyes.