Whispering Voices

[Fiction]

Whispering voices
A note on the wall
The screams of the choices
Now don't matter at all

Blood on my hands
A smile on my face
Forever mine now
One final embrace

It's not that I want you
To have and to hold
But for once this time
You'll do as your told

You might have me destroyed
But this time you'll see
I'm perfectly capable
To set myself free

I stare at your body
My duty is done
My hands start to tremble
As I drop the gun

I know you deserve this
Revenge is so sweet
Don't worry my dear,
Your memory i'll keep

I can hardly forget
With all the pain and the lies
But at least this time
It's a part of you that dies.

[Breakeven]

i love it!!!! :heart: its really good

[Noirtier]

I love it overall--the voice and flow of it are fairly consistent throughout. The first and last stanzas, I feel, have a bit of a rougher flow than the rest of the piece, but I love how you ended it. Especially those last two lines, I think really show the whole message behind the piece. You did a really great job Kathy!

[Fiction]

i love it!!!! :heart: its really good

Thank you :)

I love it overall--the voice and flow of it are fairly consistent throughout. The first and last stanzas, I feel, have a bit of a rougher flow than the rest of the piece, but I love how you ended it. Especially those last two lines, I think really show the whole message behind the piece. You did a really great job Kathy!

The last stanza is meant to be slightly rougher. The last line at least. Gives it more emphasis in my opinion :p But I know some of it doesn't quite fit.

And thank you :) I'm glad I got the message accross, it's quite a personal piece.

[Pierce]

I really like it. Ill be honest i ddn't really get it but thats my fault poety is to be iterpretted and its up to the reader to undersstand it. So sorry for bad spelling im trying to do this quickly. usually spelling not this bad or grammar. sorry!