A Dillema...

[magicjack8]

My cousin and I are very close. We can tell each other practically anything.
He's told me he's been doing drugs (Marijuana I think), and I don't know how many times he's done it, he didn't say it was good or bad, but I'm worried about him. He could try other drugs and his health could be at risk. I know the negative effects of drugs, an I personally wouldn't do them, but i'm still worried about him.

What should I do? I don't really wanna tell anyone, coz that might ruin our relationship...

[Maverick]

General Puberty :arrow: Drugs and Meds

How old are you and how old is your cousin?

You can always try to talk him out of it but there's only so much you can do. Some people are stubborn and if he really wants to, he'll do it. The only thing you can do is tell him how you feel and that you're concerned about his health. If he doesn't want to listen, it's either let him be or tell someone.

[Brandon639]

You have to. If you care about him, you want him safe right? If that means a ruined relationship well then, he doesnt care about the fact that you didnt want him hurt so you took action. If you really want him safe, either convince him to stop on his own or get him help.

When health problems arise then you have too ways what you could have made it turn out.
1. He keeps doing it and you dont tell. He eventually gets a illness. you then think "Oh no. I knew this whole time and didnt do anything or tell anyone."

Or

2. you stop him just in time either by talking or telling someone and you think. "Oh my gosh. I saved him."

and if he dont like it then... at least you did the right thing

[magicjack8]

General Puberty :arrow: Drugs and Meds

How old are you and how old is your cousin?

You can always try to talk him out of it but there's only so much you can do. Some people are stubborn and if he really wants to, he'll do it. The only thing you can do is tell him how you feel and that you're concerned about his health. If he doesn't want to listen, it's either let him be or tell someone.

I'm 13 & he is 14...

[Brandon639]

I'm 13 & he is 14...


yea see your both still young. Do something before its to late.

[Maverick]

Well like I said you should talk to him first before telling anyone and voice your concerns. Then if he continues to do it and you want something done, tell his parents. Smoking weed at 14 is not good and can mess him up badly. You should try to stop it before he makes a bigger mess of himself.

[serial-thrilla]

although i think marijuana is quite minor, you should probably talk to him becuase he seems to be getting into it quite early which may indicate that he will do worse drugs when hes older.

[byee]

This is a terrible spot to be in. Obviously, you care about him, yet you do not want to betray his trust in you. You have to decide which is more important to you, and frankly, I do not envy your situation here. No matter what you do, you will likely feel lousy. There is no good compromise, short of talking with him and getting him to agree to stop smoking (which he may or may not do, or be truthful about).

Pot is bad stuff (Our 'Serial Thrilla' is a drug abuser so he's not exactly objective here), it would be best for him to stop. If you discuss your concerns with him and he refuses to take your concerns seriously, i'd suggest you take a long walk alone somewhere and think about the 2 options (saying nothing and living with him continuing to use drugs, or telling YOUR parents not his), and decide which one of those options you can more easily live with.

Alot of times in really close relationships people tell us stuff that upsets us or makes us concerned, esp. about the things that they might be doing that's not good for them. It's important to establish with them (maybe as they're saying it), that you will not keep secrets when it comes to their health and safety. That way, at least they know what the potential consequences of telling you are.

here, however, you're faced with a hard decision. Think about which alternative you can more easily live with.

[serial-thrilla]

Pot is bad stuff (Our 'Serial Thrilla' is a drug abuser so he's not exactly objective here), excuse me!? who the hell do you think you are belittling my opionion because i have used some minor drugs before in my life? Its really terrible how ignorant some people are, if you knew anything about drugs and actually researched them from non biased websites you may learn a thing or two, but thats all beside the point. I simply stated that occasional marijuana use is not really that big of a deal. If he thinks that its ruining his friends life, which i doubt it is because he sounded like he only used it a few times then by all means talk to him about it. I also think that it would be wise to maybe learn the mental side effects of extensive marijuana use and talk to him about it so he doesent use it very often or get into more dangerous addictive drugs.

[byee]

excuse me!? who the hell do you think you are belittling my opionion because i have used some minor drugs before in my life? Its really terrible how ignorant some people are, if you knew anything about drugs and actually researched them from non biased websites you may learn a thing or two, but thats all beside the point. I simply stated that occasional marijuana use is not really that big of a deal. If he thinks that its ruining his friends life, which i doubt it is because he sounded like he only used it a few times then by all means talk to him about it. I also think that it would be wise to maybe learn the mental side effects of extensive marijuana use and talk to him about it so he doesent use it very often or get into more dangerous addictive drugs.


Sorry, thrilla, but the only impressions we get online is what you, the writer, give us. And you've clearly stated your opinions of drug use (regardless of frequency), and it's clear you advocate the use of them. That's not ignorance on my part, just accurate observation. Unfortunately, your bias towards drug abuse is pretty clear, which makes you hardly objective in such matters.

Drugs have profound effects on the functioning of the body (even 'occasional' use), I'd suggest you look at a truly scientific site, like the NIMH or CDC websites, those which report the studies done by scientists with the training and credentials which most reasonable people would feel confident accepting.

Yes, I'm against drug use, because I've done the research to find the facts by those without an agenda (other than to report accurate info). But the issue the OP presents isn't seeking your opinion on drug use, but rather what his options are because of his concern about his cousins drug use. I believe I've answered that concern.

[Cap'nCrunch]

yea see your both still young. Do something before its to late.

Sounds like a point of perspective to me. If Marijuana appears to be causing major problems in his life, such as...
1. Separation from family
2. Dropping grades
3. Trouble with the law

THEN do I suggest you try to stop him. Otherwise, he's not hurting anybody. Is he? I'm no longer a marijuana user, because it makes people lazy and it makes people act like assholes. If your cousin is really changing, then tell him how you feel. And don't let him try to get you into it; If you want to try drugs, don't do them when you're still a minor (when you've got a lot to lose).

Also, Serial-Thrilla is quite right: using marijuana at such a young age will more than likely lead to hard drug abuse in later years. And IAMSAM, I'm a drug user, too. Are you going to say that I haven't made any valid points in my post because IM a drug user, too? You just have NO clue about drugs except what your D.A.R.E officer told you. I'd appreciate if you kept your malformed opinions to yourself.

[byee]

Sounds like a point of perspective to me. If Marijuana appears to be causing major problems in his life, such as...
1. Separation from family
2. Dropping grades
3. Trouble with the law

THEN do I suggest you try to stop him. Otherwise, he's not hurting anybody. Is he? I'm no longer a marijuana user, because it makes people lazy and it makes people act like assholes. If your cousin is really changing, then tell him how you feel. And don't let him try to get you into it; If you want to try drugs, don't do them when you're still a minor (when you've got a lot to lose).

Also, Serial-Thrilla is quite right: using marijuana at such a young age will more than likely lead to hard drug abuse in later years. And IAMSAM, I'm a drug user, too. Are you going to say that I haven't made any valid points in my post because IM a drug user, too? You just have NO clue about drugs except what your D.A.R.E officer told you. I'd appreciate if you kept your malformed opinions to yourself.

No, I'm not saying that either of you are not making valid points, just that your perspective is influenced by your decision to use drugs. The OP's question, once again, didn't call for your opinion on his cousin's drug use, but rather a clarification on his options given his discomfort. You'll notice there's no reason to patronizingly dismiss my response, esp. since I'm the one who actually understood the question.

[Maverick]

Guys stay on topic. Do not turn this into a debate. This is about helping the original poster overcome a difficult decision. Any further off-topic posts will be deleted. Thanks for the cooperation.

[lexielarue]

wow a lot of people dont know much about drugs now do they

if he does weed thats very minor

you cant talk him out of trust me it doesnt work people try to talk me out of it all the time

my friends are always worried about me and my safety just like you are to your cousin

your cousin might have a reason for doing drugs and he might do them cause there fun to do like me

he cousin will be ok if he just does weed its when you start mixing drugs like taking acid and vikaden most people dont no that vikaden is a very addicting drug and many people get addicted to it i know a kid who took about 10 everyday until his friends realized that he was getting weaker he had no care in life and he was hanging on to life by a thread

that probably makes it seem like your cousin is gonna die but very few people die from smoking weed

if you try and tell your cousin that you hate the fact that he smokes then your relationship is going to grow further and further apart