SmexiLexie510
October 20th, 2012, 09:26 AM
I'm at a tuition centre instead of a regular school. It's a place for kids that have had mental/emotional problems or a hard time at main stream school. There are fifteen pupils there and I only do half days. There are 5 others in my class and two teachers in the class every lesson.
The problem is with the security. They have constant CCTV every where except the bathroom's so everything is recorded and nothing is missed. They use it to ensure safety and security and also as proof if any allegations are made or problems occur. It also means they can monitor our behavior and look back on incidents to see how they really occured. But saying all this, whilst I have been there, (started beginning of September) they have not once had to refer back to it, take any notice of it or use it in any way. With the problems I have, it really freaks me out, the fact that there are constantly camera's trained on us. I think people are watching us, I get paranoid and afraid and insecure and with my mental state, it makes my behavior 100 times worse. It gets me worked up and makes me invent things in my head that I know could not possibly be real and are completely unrealistic and sometimes impossible, but my paranoia and schizophrenic tendencies, makes me wholeheartedly believe in my stupid thoughts about the 'real' reason they have CCTV, who has access to it and what is is 'really' used for, etc, etc.
I know there is nothing really that can be done but it's causing me problems and I just don't know what to do about it.
The problem is with the security. They have constant CCTV every where except the bathroom's so everything is recorded and nothing is missed. They use it to ensure safety and security and also as proof if any allegations are made or problems occur. It also means they can monitor our behavior and look back on incidents to see how they really occured. But saying all this, whilst I have been there, (started beginning of September) they have not once had to refer back to it, take any notice of it or use it in any way. With the problems I have, it really freaks me out, the fact that there are constantly camera's trained on us. I think people are watching us, I get paranoid and afraid and insecure and with my mental state, it makes my behavior 100 times worse. It gets me worked up and makes me invent things in my head that I know could not possibly be real and are completely unrealistic and sometimes impossible, but my paranoia and schizophrenic tendencies, makes me wholeheartedly believe in my stupid thoughts about the 'real' reason they have CCTV, who has access to it and what is is 'really' used for, etc, etc.
I know there is nothing really that can be done but it's causing me problems and I just don't know what to do about it.