way can't i be normal

[ace450]

I am 18 and gay and I hate my life it seems unfary that I can't choisees to be strate so I am not going to have a famaly of my own, i know you will all say it is normal and I should be happy but that is not the way it is for me, my friends are homophobic and hate gays there was a boy In my old school he was gay and we made his life a misery I feel so bad for him now I now what he was going throw. How can you live with being gay?

[Straight]

You can have a family, just not in the 'natural' way. There's adoption, and you could get someone to hold your baby for you. Also, there are tonnes of acceptive communities who won't discriminate against your sexual preference. Brighton is a great place, Brighton is a very diverse city and is named the gay capital of Europe. If you don't want to move away, You could find another group of friends who would be willing to accept you. It gets better! Just give it time

[ace450]

Thanks mate it helps a bit.

[StoppingTime]

:arrow: Teen Sexuality, this forum will harbor better answers for you.

[Jupiter]

Honestly, it takes time to accept this. Please remember that you CAN be happy. No matter how cliche it sounds, you can do it. Remember that you can adopt.

Why you can't be normal? Well I can't answer that for you. I'm sorry that you feel that way about your sexuality, and I wish to all ends that you can learn to be happy about it.

[The Mockingjay]

You've just got to accept it, and you will with time. You can have a family and if your family and friends actually love you for you they will get used to it. Its bad you made someone's life hell for being gay, but I suppose you're getting paid back for that now. Good luck and if you want any advice I'm here :)

[Inventor2]

You just need to accept it and be proud. Theres a song i listened to on youtube called Same Love. Its on the tops list if you can find it, it really helps. :)

[Twilly F. Sniper]

I am 18 and gay and I hate my life it seems unfary that I can't choisees to be strate so I am not going to have a famaly of my own, i know you will all say it is normal and I should be happy but that is not the way it is for me, my friends are homophobic and hate gays there was a boy In my old school he was gay and we made his life a misery I feel so bad for him now I now what he was going throw. How can you live with being gay?

I live with being bisexual because my friends were that way, and moved on. Thats a tough one bud, I dont know what to say there.

[MartyG]

You are not going to be able to live your dream. Although I don't know if it's really your dream....but maybe it's the dream that society presented to you.

Of course; I'm referring to the dream that places you with a loving and beautiful wife...a great job....beautiful children...etc.

That dream can be replaced with another dream....that of finding and loving a special someone who can help you build your new dream....and this new dream can be customized to the real you....giving you what you really want.

Being gay isn't the greatest; lets face it. Even in this day and age there is a lot of discrimination, hatred, and mis-understandings thrown our way. That will not be fun. But; you get to love another human being. If it wasn't for you...that person might never find the love of his life! And; what a shame that would be!

Hang in there; it will get better.

MartyG

[dontfiguremeout]

Hmm, well if you know your friends are going to make you miserable if they know your gay, then they wouldn't be friends worth keeping anymore! I mean your pretty old enough to where this is who you are, and you should accept it! If your friends are going to make you miserable, find a different group of friends who will accept who you are, and help you through this journey! And as family wise, can't you adopt kids? I mean there are so many ways for you to build a family! Many other gays or lesbians do it, and if they can you can! So accept yourself, and know that yes you will have people who will make you miserable, but don't listen to them, and be strong!

[Drew5]

tough one. any chance you can find the kid you picked on ? Maybe that will give you some peace.

[Magnus Bane]

you just can't help the way you are. learn accept it. sometimes it has to do with heredity. have a family there is adoption you could have a serrogant mother carry a baby for you and your partner if you get one. just don't be so negative. i live with a living hell every day in school. because people are assholes. just be you and accept it. that is the only way you are ever going to be happy. :cool:

[Pipo]

I am 18 and gay and I hate my life it seems unfary that I can't choisees to be strate so I am not going to have a famaly of my own, i know you will all say it is normal and I should be happy but that is not the way it is for me, my friends are homophobic and hate gays there was a boy In my old school he was gay and we made his life a misery I feel so bad for him now I now what he was going throw. How can you live with being gay?

First off sexuality shouldn't matter to your friends but the person should not his sexuality is he straight, bi, gay, trans etc it doesn't matter.

How I can live with being gay? it's simple I don't think about it much I only tell to those friends who are close to me that I'm gay and forget the others, even tho some seem to be homophobic I don't care let them be. How it's gonna effect me anyway? I'm not gonna tell them "Hey I'm gay" why I should?

Forget that you're gay and focus school, job, friends, etc. I'm sorry you feel bad for that boy maybe you should talk to him if you ever knew him closer than the others? I know how he feels I've been through that too.

I don't really think about my sexuality it's not so important anyway.

[ace450]

Thanks to all of you it has made me feel better but i can't adopt I got a criminal record :(.

[Brice]

I believe that you can choose sexuality. I know others don't agree with me, but that's what I believe. You have the power to change or choose anything in life. Like a play. Paint your own seen, choose your own actors/actresses, write your own script. If your friends are homophobic and you're gay, you shouldn't be friends with them. Don't take part in making fun of other gays though, if you choose to stay with those friends. You've written your play and you don't like it. So change it. It's as simple as that.

[StoppingTime]

I believe that you can choose sexuality. I know others don't agree with me, but that's what I believe. You have the power to change or choose anything in life.

I can choose anything in my life? I hope you don't mean that literally, because it makes less than no sense in so many ways.

On the topic of sexuality. It's been proven, many, many times, that it is not a choice. People don't suddenly decide they want to be in a relationship with the same sex. It is somewhere either in the genes, or during a phase of early development during your life; things you in fact, cannot change.

[Brice]

I know you don't agree with anything I say, Stopping Time. We have already had this argument, if you don't remember. And I said I was done with it. I am entitled to my own opinion whether their are facts backing something or not. It's my belief and it stands no matter how many times it's tested or debated over.

[Pipo]

I can choose anything in my life? I hope you don't mean that literally, because it makes less than no sense in so many ways.

On the topic of sexuality. It's been proven, many, many times, that it is not a choice. People don't suddenly decide they want to be in a relationship with the same sex. It is somewhere either in the genes, or during a phase of early development during your life; things you in fact, cannot change.

I've actually tried to do this and no it's not working it made me really unhappy and generally I felt bad. Soon as I stopped doing it I got happy and life seemed so much better and still does.

(I'm just saying my experience of it)

[MartyG]

Hey again Ace; nobody says that you have to live where you live now. If you are in a gay-unfriendly place.....research it and move! It's a big big big big world; there is a place where you can be happy.

Thay might fix the adoption/criminal record part of it too. You're 18; courts have a way of "fixing" records of people under 18. Maybe not this week...but in time that might work. Talk to an attorney.

Nevertheless...moving to another state or another country might fix that anyway...the charges might not follow you...or would be handled differently in relation to adoption.

How are you right now? Let us know how you're doing?

MartyG