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View Full Version : Terrible day, first (hopefully last) suicide of someone I knew.


RelicHunter97
September 26th, 2012, 07:34 PM
Hello.

Today was a terrible day. It all started last night, when a girl in my school, her name was Milly, committed suicide. Nobody knew until this morning, when the teachers told the terrible news during first block. Probably one third of the people in my school went home to grieve, and almost everyone else was depressed all day. Almost everyone cried at some point, like I am as I'm writing this. Personally, I didn't even know her, but I always saw her around school babe was pretty, she was an amazing artist, she sang, and almost everyone liked her. However, she did get picked on a lot, and apparently she was battling depression for some time. I never even once spoke to her, and I can't believe she is gone. I feel terrible inside, like there is a rock in my chest, and I can't stop thinking about her and today in general. Seeing so many people cry, teachers, friends, hundreds of people, it was very hard to look at. Every teacher (except for one) allowed their students to leave class, and every event was cancelled for today. Like I said, I didn't even know her, but I am so deeply affected. Many of my tears, as well of my friends', and others' were brought on not just by her death, but by the terrible memories of bullying and suicidal feelings which had been for the most part buried in a shallow grave. The thing about these memories is that they never go away, always haunting you, eating away at you. Seeing my friends crying was just too much, and I broke down. The air was think and heavy, and it just felt weird all day. I'm just beginning to grasp the whole concept of what happened, and I can't stop thinking about it. She was so nice, and every memory I had of seeing her was her either smiling or her deeply involved in her murals. I also feel extremely bad for her mother, whom I see everyday for she works at my school. I can't even begin to fathom the devastation she is feeling. I...I just feel empty inside. I don't even know if I could function if it was one of my friends, let alone a stranger. She is going to be missed by so many, never to be forgotten. Tomorrow a candlelight vigil is being held at my school, and I plan to attend. Well, that was my day, I'm exhausted and I just can't wait to sleep...
I was wondering if anyone else has had a similar experience, or had and advice for getting past this. I have never been so close to someone who has taken their own life, it's just so much to take in. I'm going to stop rambling, and try To sleep

xXJust Jump ItXx
September 26th, 2012, 09:30 PM
Oh my god... :( Im really sorry, Anthony... That heck even if you didnt know them well is hard. I havent had that problem here, being its such a small school but the death of anyone its... Just well this is a understatement but its a hard thing to just deal with!

RelicHunter97
September 26th, 2012, 09:40 PM
Yeah, it is hard no matter who the person. And m actually in a fairly small school. Less than 650 kids which account for 4 towns grades 7-12. I guess eventually life goes on?

xXJust Jump ItXx
September 26th, 2012, 09:44 PM
Talk about small school! And it does.

Breakeven
September 27th, 2012, 10:06 AM
im sorry hear to that , stay strong and if u need someone to talk too , im here :hug:

SmexiLexie510
September 27th, 2012, 12:47 PM
I've had experience of being in the same school as a person who committed suicide. Her name was Kate. She used to be bullied all the time but then everyone pretty much left her alone. 18 months and nothing happened along the lines of bullying that would make us suspect anything. She'd left letters in some of the classrooms and some of the people's lockers. suicide notes.. no one really knew how to re act.. pm me if you need anything. RIP Kate and Milly

West Coast Sheriff
September 27th, 2012, 05:23 PM
Just stay strong this can be tough to deal with. I had an uncle who committed suicide by on purpose overdos. They found him with a bottle of whiskey and all kinds do pills. I was like an infant at the time so never got to really know him.

RelicHunter97
September 27th, 2012, 07:47 PM
Thank you all for your responses :) today I feel much better, and the vigil was powerful and it gave me a sense of closure. Tomorrow is going to be cold and rainy though :(

Jshack43
September 27th, 2012, 10:15 PM
wow im in ohio and my school has about 3 thousand thers 650 in my lunch

Sinusitis
September 28th, 2012, 04:21 AM
I'm sorry to hear that. Pray for her.Do not think so much about this.