Confused

[Underground_Network]

Lately I'm confused. I seem to just have no clue when it comes to girls. I don't think I'll ever work up the guts to ask out a girl, out of fear of rejection. My friends don't talk about girls much, and they don't care much whether they date or not. They have some friends that are girls, but in my opinion, the girls they've befriended are either ugly (and I don't mean to be mean, but based on the way they dress, I think they intend to be hideous) or strange. Two somewhat strange things happened today. I'm straight, downright heterosexual, although I'm probably 95% straight, since I don't think its possible to be 100% straight, but today this guy I've known since sixth grade walked up to me and called me hot. I'm not sure what to make of this. Rumors have spread around that he's gay, but I'm just confused. He wasn't harassing me, and he's a nice guy, but he kind of just caught me off guard when he called me hot. Again, I'm not sure what to make of it. Now the other strange thing, isn't exactly strange. Quite possibly the hottest girl in my grade is in my math class, and today was the first day of school, so no one was really paying attention. I reached down to either get something that I dropped on the floor or do something else, and when I looked up I saw her looking at me. At that point it just seemed like she had turned her head to see if I was looking at her. But throughout the class we exchanged glances. And for a large part of the class she seemed to be staring at me. She knew about as many people as I did, as we're both freshmen, and there were only about 4 freshmen in my math class, and about 20 sophomores, so we were both somewhat uncomfortable. I don't know what to make of this. I think its just nothing, but I have a major crush on her, and now I think I might have a chance with her, but love is just so confusing, and I think I'll just be single forever, unless a girl I like asks me out, because I don't think I can even say hello to a girl I like.

[Octo22]

Confidence is one of the most major turn ons to a girl. Say hello to her, take risks.

With no risk, comes no victory.

I'm not sure what else to offer :P

[The Resurrected One]

Yes, so to all those people who told me to forget about the letter in my situation, it's a risk! And I'll take it! :D

[Octo22]

The worst that comes from rejection is a week or two of "boo hoo" and then you move on. Nothing serious.

To be honest, it's good to get rejected a lot. Will not only make you more confident around girls but will also prepare you for the real world (Universities/jobs/etc.)

[Break the Cage]

Just wait til your a little older, you will get confidence and you will get talking to girls at partys, college/school or whatever and you will find one you get along well with.

[Serenity]

Yes, so to all those people who told me to forget about the letter in my situation, it's a risk! And I'll take it! :D

Johnny, keep your issues out of other people's threads, please and thank you.

[byee]

Well, to start with, let me say you express yourself very well. This will help you with girls alot!

Fear of rejection is as old as mankind, I personally think it is attached to the 'Y' chromosome that makes us guys, so you're not alone. The only thing greater than our fear of rejection might be girls' fear of not being liked or accepted. So your in luck, they're probably so scared themselves that they don't realize your fear!

First, the fact that a guy friend called you 'hot' doesn't mean he's gay (or he thinks you're gay) or that he's coming on to you. Maybe he's trying to be supportive (esp. if you guys have been friends all this time), and give you a different perspective on yourself that you might be overlooking because you're lacking confidence? We rarely see ourselves as others do, afterall. maybe he's saying something to reassure and inspire you. A good friend will do that (regardless of their sexuality).

Maybe this major hottie in math sees that part of you and is interested. People usually don't look for very long at others who they find unappealing, afterall. Try focusing on the positive message of her looking over at you, and maybe after class say 'hi!', nothing too deep, don't go planning your wedding or anything. See what happens, there's little risk in saying 'Hi'. People usually get too far ahead of things too soon and start talking too much or expecting too much, that's when problems happen. But you're on safe ground with a 'Hi' and a smile.

Take it slow, the beginning of the school year (and high school) is a good time to develop relationships of all kinds because everything is new and people are looking to make new things happen. Just don't overlook opportunities because you're too wrapped up in your own worries. Because they are too, which neutralizes yours.

Let us know how it goes.

[Underground_Network]

I still haven't said anything to her yet.... but I learned that we both like to doodle/draw random stuff, and I'm in math with her and our teacher is really boring. But she kept looking over to see what I was doing, and I kept looking over at what she was doing. I don't know if I have the guts to say anything, and to tell you the truth, a lot of the girls in my school have boyfriends that nobody knows about (except for their close friends), in other words, a lot of the girls don't show off that they have a boyfriend during school, and although I don't know, I think she might have one. I have absolutely no clue, but I think anyone as beautiful as her must have a boyfriend. I just don't want to ask her out and learn she has a boyfriend. I don't know what to do, I can't even make small talk. All the girls I've ever talked to have always started the conversations. Even with guys I suck at starting conversations. I'm too damn shy sometimes. If someone talks to me, and I got locked in a conversation, you would think of me as the opposite of shy, but sometimes when I'm hanging around people (like at my lunch table where I only know one person), you can tell I'm shy, because I don't talk much, unless someone talks to me, which isn't often unless one of them is asking if they can borrow money or have some of my food. I don't think I can ever talk to her unless she talks first. I also screw up and make an ass of myself in front of girls. I don't even think advice can help. I think I just have to rant... oh I don't know...:/