My dad's cheating on my mom.

[SimSailorNick]

Yes i'm sure 'cause i've seen them.

And if you're gonna tell me it's none of my business, just don't because IT IS. It's affecting my entire family (not just parents and siblings) and i can't focus on anything (academics, friends, ANYTHING)

Some of my uncles and aunts have already reached out to me in wanting to hire a private investigator so we can have concrete proof.

I have been thinking about running away for a few weeks now 'cause i really just can't take my parents fighting all the time, being heard by the neighbors 'cause they're screaming at each other, my mom crying behind her door. I just can't take it anymore.

The whole family has talked to my dad but he really doesn't want to admit even though everyone believes he cheated.

The biggest problem is that this girl has been stealing thousands from my dad but he still won't let go of her.

I hope the private investigator ends this. What do you think?

[Corb]

I would try to confront the woman who your dad is cheating with. If your dad won't listen maybe she will. Tell her what she is doing to your family. Explain the hurt she is inflicting on so many and explain how it isn't fair. Good luck bro, i'm sorry you have to go through this. Feel free to hit me up if you need an open ear.

[wild1]

Just one thing to keep in mind ..... You're gonna have a relationship with your Dad for the rest of his life no matter what happens, if your parents stay married together or get divorced. Don't do or say anything to him that could ruin your relationship with him unless he's been a very bad dad to you. I'm telling you this because my aunt and uncle divorced and my cousin refuses to ever talk to her dad. He never did anything to her.

[conniption]

I am so sorry for what you're going through. I went through the same thing when I was little, I was so mad at both my parents for a while. I never understood why my mom stayed with my dad, it was hard for me and my siblings going through that and I wish nobody had to go through that. Just stay strong, and like Kevin said both your parents are always going to be part of your life wether you like it or not. If you need someone to talk to I'll be here.

[Mirage]

Confront her. I can't believe there are people in this world that do this kind of thing...you need to put an end to it. Tell her what she is doing to your family, maybe SOME motherly instinct will kick in and pry her away from you.

[FreeFall]

Do not confront her.
She's probably very aware your father's got a family. She could either harm you, get him to hurt the family, steal ALL of the money. Just leave it to the PI.

Wild1, you're actually very wrong. Just because a person is family does not mean you've this obligation to maintain a relationship to them for the rest of your life. Family members estrange each other all the time if they have to do it to keep a healthy life and mind. A person is a person no matter what, family or not. They don't get a free pass to your life just because DNA is shared.

So SimSailorNick do not feel like you have any obligation or responsibility to your father.
Deal with him in your life how you see fit but you are, under any circumstances, required to speak to him if you don't want. He really seems to have cared about you guys when he decided to walk away emotionally and cheat.

I hope you all get the proof, I hope your mom opens her eyes, and I really hope this woman hasn't passed along any STDs. Major concerns when affairs emerge. I wish you piece of mind.

[StoneColdNicky]

So your aunts and uncles are trying to convince you to hire the PI? Can't they do that themselves if they are concerned? You said you already know that he is cheating, so it isn't like you need proof.

Does your mum suspect, is that why they are fighting? Or are they fighting for other reasons? Have you spoken to your dad, as someone who knows that he is cheating, not just someone who maybe has a feeling or suspects? Have you approached him? I agree with you that it is your business, so maybe you should approach him and tell him that you know, and you think he should do something - if only because the other woman is stealing.

[HunterSteele]

You said you already know that he is cheating, so it isn't like you need proof.

It sounds like his dad is still denying it, so he needs proof, as in photos. Besides, a private investigator can do a lot more than just gather proof. They can also find out more about this woman so you can better plan what you will do.

[FullyAlive]

I may have just overlooked this but I couldn't see where you mentioned your mum.

Is it at all possible to have someone tell her so she can decide what to do, perhaps give your dad an ultimatum?

[cassy95]

I may have just overlooked this but I couldn't see where you mentioned your mum.

Is it at all possible to have someone tell her so she can decide what to do, perhaps give your dad an ultimatum?

I fully agree...It is their relationship. You are grown and should counsel your dad as an adult and tell him he is screwing up. If he wants to be with this other woman, he is sooooo doing it the wrong way.

What would you tell your boy that is cheating on his gf...Sorry dude, this is the big leagues now, and if you know, but your mom doesn't, you really need to set your dad straight.

Reeeeeallly, I'm sorry you have to deal with this.