Officer, I can explain!

[Jackerlus]

In his game the person above you has to say any three things that will be found in your car boot when you are stopped by a police officer. You then have to explain how you are innocent, for instance:

[im stopped with the president's wife, a whip, and some rope. All has to be in the boot by the way with no size limit to the boot :D]

Officer! You see, my seats are very dirty at the moment and I was bringing the president's wife to my whip shop because she wanted to see my stock. So I put her in the boot to save her from sitting on those awful seats! The whip in the back is just for a glimpse of my products. The rope? Oh I keep that in there to tie my shop storage boxes on the roof.

Now your turn! You are found with a plan of the English parliament, a knife, and a balaclava.

After you answer, you must name three objects for the next person.

[Zephyr]

Oh, hello officer! What am I doing with these items you ask? I'm a contractor and the government has contracted me to put in new lighting systems in the parliament. You see, I also have health issues, COPD to be exact, therefore I wear a mask when I work to avoid breathing in any particles of material that have been cut up.

Yeah, I'm not a smooth talker at all, lol.

Items for the next person: a chainsaw, a latex bodysuit and a shovel.

[Breakeven]

aww hey officer , lovely day huh? those not look like what ur thinking , im an actor and we r doing this show , u should come watch us one time huh?
"drive as fast as i can yelling BITCH!" lol

knife , beer , coke

[NotAvailable]

yes officer i understand that it may looks weird to have this stuff , but u see , i have this issue with drinking , so i decided o bring beer and don't drink it , and when i feel like i want to have a shot, i poke my leg with the knife and then drink coke instead , it's effective way to stop drinking , i'm sober for more than 10 minutes now ..... [hiccups].

unconscious naked girl, knife and rope.

[Sonic Boom]

It's not what it looks like! I just rescued this poor girl from rapists using my knife. But I kept the rope to err make a swing in my garden. The rapists were somewhere in a sewage tunnel. Happy searching!

Dynamite, US$500 000 cash and a pig.

[Silicate Wielder]

Why hello officer, I just won the lottery at the gastation on my way home from work, I work at a Mining site and we use TNT to blow up parts of the cave system we are exploring so we can get further in. The pig is for dinner.

Stow-away, bomb planted in engine, trunk and under your seat, and last but not least a flamethrower

[BebeFleur.]

Bonjour, Officer! :) Would you kindly assist me? I was at the local supermarket when I found this odd fellow messing with my engine. I don't know what he was doing, but I also found him with this. *holds up flamethrower* I was quite worried, but now that you are here, Officer, I am quite relieved.

A beaten child tied up in ropes, a used condom, and a half used jar of grape jelly.

[The LOLer]

Ello officer,you see, I am a director for the new movie Fucking Kid Zombies Covered In Jelly3. It is a porno, and there is no law against undead child pornography. I am on my way to a promotion for the movie. you can come if you like.

RPG, Head of a snow leopard and a bloody bone.

[AlexBarrett]

Well, you see officer, I was on my way to the circues down in *insert name of out of state town here* And the knife, jar of blood, and imitation (wink) corpse is part of a horror act I'm doing. You can check me out on youtube if you don't believe me. Now get that gun out of my face, please sir.

[jayyy-lmao]

Well, you see officer, I was on my way to the circues down in *insert name of out of state town here* And the knife, jar of blood, and imitation (wink) corpse is part of a horror act I'm doing. You can check me out on youtube if you don't believe me. Now get that gun out of my face, please sir.

You didn't give things for the next person!

[AlexBarrett]

You didn't give things for the next person!

because yolo

[BebeFleur.]

I will give three items:

~Bag full of illegal drugs
~10 large bottle of hard whiskey
~Fake IDs

[Synyster Shadows]

You see, officer, I was buying the whiskey for a friend who likes it strong. The IDs are for a performance I'm putting on (come see it), and the drugs? Oh, some guy gave it to me. I'm taking it to the landfill.

Don't judge me for that.

A crowbar
A crate full of dynamite
A piece of PVC pipe

[BebeFleur.]

'ello Sir. My papa works for a home repair service and told me to take this box to 491 Park Street. The PVC was for the last job he did, same for the crowbar. This box he told me is for a new invention. He called it the B.O.M.B. I don't know it stands for, but he told me to deliver it!

*fail*

Bloody ax
Empty bottle of birth control pills
A screaming baby

[The LOLer]

You see sir, my girlfriend took these pills so she wouldn't get pregnant. Well, that didnt work so this is my son. I kinda got mad and she killed herself with this axe.

Tied up nun
Dented baseball bat
Broken miniature cross

[HahaWaitWhat]

Uh yeah hi, hard to explain buuuuut, I take worship a little too far when I'm wasted.

Jimmy Hoffa's corpse.
A few hundred algebra text books.
A case of anal lube.