Crappy friend, or is it just me?

[Princess Ariel]

One of my friends is going through the same stuff, well. Almost the same.
Lately all we've been talking about is either her depression or my depression. Plus, we trigger each other. Now, since i've had experience with triggering friends I keep it at a very low-risk trigger for them lately, but all she does is spill everything out and it makes me worse because i'm giving them advice on family issues, when i've got my own. She talks about her saying that people are worse off then her, but that doesn't make her hurt less. That's how I feel, but the thing is.
On wednesday we had a sleepover and it got to the point when I was in the bathroom purging (disgusting, I know. It's a bad habit of mine) She seems to advocate it. She's missed 70% of the past school year and she blames it on me. I wasn't sure how to react, so of course. I chickened out and ran away. I feel as if she controls my life. I take a breath wrong and she'll be up my ass.

I used to say I love her without any hesitance, lately. I'm not so sure. I feel like, not only is she advocating it. She doesn't care who she tells. She wants people to fix it for her. I know that it's can be a call for help, but it comes to a point when they.. well. They become attention whores.
I'm sorry if this isn't making sense.

I just don't know what to do, she makes my life even more of a living hell, but I'd still be devastated if anything happened to her.

I just don't want to be that friend that's there for her day and night when really, i'm dying inside.

Advice?

[FreeFall]

I'm sorry. You both have depression, and she advocates you purging, and is a rusty nail in your side.
What are you getting from her? What positive thing does she add into your life? What do you want from this relationship? Why do you feel so responsible for her and her well being when she doesn't give a crap about your's?
She's a toxic person.

Read this (http://bipolar.about.com/od/support/a/070315_toxic.htm) It'll help establish what you're seeing.

Read this to get advice: http://www.wikihow.com/Save-Yourself-from-Toxic-People

I sincerely ask that you read those two site. I wish you the best of luck and better friends!

[Nathan Numberless]

She's taking advantage of you. Give her the cold shoulder for a week so she will know what a nightmare it is with no friends. If she has other friends then she can be THEIR parasite, not YOURS, and as long as she's happy, you can forget about her and find other friends.

[Princess Ariel]

I'm sorry. You both have depression, and she advocates you purging, and is a rusty nail in your side.
What are you getting from her? What positive thing does she add into your life? What do you want from this relationship? Why do you feel so responsible for her and her well being when she doesn't give a crap about your's?
She's a toxic person.

I just feel as if she's the only person both her and I can go to. I feel responsible for her life since i'm one of the few friends who she can talk to, but the only one she can trust. If she did something drastic, i'd feel as if it was my fault.
i'll take a look at the two links. Thank you.

[TigerBoy]

I'm sorry. You both have depression, and she advocates you purging, and is a rusty nail in your side.
What are you getting from her? What positive thing does she add into your life? What do you want from this relationship? Why do you feel so responsible for her and her well being when she doesn't give a crap about your's?
She's a toxic person.

Read this (http://bipolar.about.com/od/support/a/070315_toxic.htm) It'll help establish what you're seeing.

Read this to get advice: http://www.wikihow.com/Save-Yourself-from-Toxic-People

I sincerely ask that you read those two site. I wish you the best of luck and better friends!

Do read the links I thought the second link was particularly interesting, although I'm worried I'm a 'fearful frightener' now. Or does saying that make me an attention seeker? Only partly joking.

It sounds to me like your self-worth would be higher without her than it is with her, but some of your other comments make me think you are worried that this is a selfish thought. If that is even what it is, I think its ok to be 'selfish' : you are struggling to stay afloat and you may not succeed if you try to rescue her : its the Titanic liferaft decision, and in fact I bet there are other forms of support for her if she needs.

Have you considered that you might actually be holding her back too? Perhaps spending time apart would be mutually beneficial, help her as much as you?

[FreeFall]

I just feel as if she's the only person both her and I can go to. I feel responsible for her life since i'm one of the few friends who she can talk to, but the only one she can trust. If she did something drastic, i'd feel as if it was my fault.
i'll take a look at the two links. Thank you.

I've nothing really to say, Tigerboy took the words out of my mouth, but I wish you the best of luck.
ah wait I've got something. If you act, don't worry if it doesn't seem to be working. The one thing most toxic people never do is back out quietly. They go down swinging, and they go down hard. They'll take as many people as they're put into their place, that's why they're toxic. They suck. But it's worth it. Trust me (: some can be reformed, but it's oh so rare. I hope you get to a better place in life!