Suicide?

[AwkwardTurtle22]

They're coming back, I don't even think they went away. The feelings, the urge. I'm so tired all of the time, I feel like everyone is watching me, I can't sleep unless I cut, I have these random times where I can't breathe properly and my heart speeds up. I don't think I can so this the only thing that calms me down is... suicide. Thinking about it just makes me relax. I know that is a bad sign, I'm scared, I'm trapped...

[AwkwardTurtle22]

I hope so I just want to start over, but that kind of thing doesn't happen in life

[AwkwardTurtle22]

I hope that's true because I am sick of fighting... I don't see any point in fighting anymore

[AwkwardTurtle22]

I really want to help people, to make a difference, but why would anyone want to get help from me? I'm messed up...

[AwkwardTurtle22]

I will try... thanks Alice.

[AwkwardTurtle22]

I forgot, how of I do that?

[CourtingErmine]

Being this place is scary, and it's a dark place. Even in control, meds, and a counselor, you have dark says. It's scary. When I was 8, my sister caught me bringing a knife to my neck, I was about to slit myself, and she knocked it out if my hand. That's when it started. Depression is horrible, next to no one should have to go through it. (When I say that I mean evil people like bin Laden). Although my mother has terrible depression, and it may e genetic, I have a strong sneaking suspicion that Singulair(asthma med) triggered it. I was fucked up, but I got out, and you will you, just stick with it. (yes, I know there are class action suits against Singulair, but can't prove it was Singulair because of my moms depression.)

[AwkwardTurtle22]

I hope things turn out alright, too. I actually take an inhaler do you think that may be triggering it?

[CourtingErmine]

I hope things turn out alright, too. I actually take an inhaler do you think that may be triggering it?

No, inhalers don't trigger depression, since it only goes to the lungs. Singulair on the other hand, ehh. If you took OT, and prove you had depression when you stopped taking it, you have a case.

[AwkwardTurtle22]

then no, It's not that... but thanks anyway :)

[CourtingErmine]

You're welcome, it is hard though having depression, a side effect, from a medicine that was supposed to help me.

[AwkwardTurtle22]

that must really suck :(