I'm going to die anyway...is it wrong to want to do it on my terms?

[Mystique]

I went to the doctor today to get a refil of my AZT medicine and just for the results of my regular blood test. He told me that the rate that my T Cells were dropping showed that my HIV would develop into AIDS in less than 5 years - more likely within 3.
I thought I would have at least 10 years like most people, but now I know I'm going to die before I can even become a doctor and try and help other people.

If I'm going to die anyway...I want it to be on my terms. I have really strong sleeping pills that I know would slow my heart enough to kill me if I took them all. I just don't know if it's worth putting myself through all this when I know I'm going to die before I can do anything with my life anyway.
I guess I just want to know what other people would honestly do. Don't judge me...

[PinkFloyd]

I'm so sorry :( No one deserves this. If you feel this way then sure, go for it but what I would do is wait it out and hope for a miracle happens. I just want you to know that all hope isn't lost. I belive in you.

- With all care, Rob

[Breakeven]

i dont think u should do it because its not ur time to die yet
u dont know these 3/4/5 years left for u might be the best years of ur life
try help people and enjoy life while u can , u can do alot in ur life if u let urself alive
if u need someone im here :hug:

[Levy]

Even if your life is going to be shortened, you've still been given three to five years. Live them out, a lot can happen in a year, or three, you might actually accomplish something. It would be a shame if you ended it right now, and prevented yourself from living the rest of the years you do have, regardless of how short they may be. If I were you, I'd treat everyday you have left like it was a miracle to be alive. Plus suicide is the easy way out, I'd like to think I would want to go down a scrapper, and fight.

[AppealToReason]

No, I don't find it wrong. In face, I've always thought the same thing. If I got cancer or some other illness, I would put a bullet in my head as soon as I knew I would die and my health began deteriorating. I would try to last as long as I could though.

[Mystique]

I know that a lot can happen in three years...but I've already lived three years with this weakness and exhaustion. With the horrible side effects from my medicine that just leave me laying in bed shaking. I have 43 Ambien and a bottle of Russian Vodka so if I took it all I would just fall asleep and probably not wake up. It would be painless and easy. 3 years of pain and judgement doesn't seem worth it to me. I fought against my HIV because I wanted to try and help other people...but I don't think I can do anything.
I just want to be able to say goodbye to my ex-girlfriend and then sleep forever...but I'm scared to die no matter what I say. I just wish I had someone I could talk to

[Dirtbiker199]

i dont think u should do it because its not ur time to die yet
u dont know these 3/4/5 years left for u might be the best years of ur life
try help people and enjoy life while u can , u can do alot in ur life if u let urself alive
if u need someone im here :hug:

I am with her^. I agree with what she says. Stay strong!

And I am also here for you. :bigsmile:

[CourtingErmine]

Understandable that you want to die, but researchers are working around the clock looking for a cure, it could come tomorrow, it could come in 100 years, you never know. Just wait it out. Suicide is wrong any which way you put it.

[Gigablue]

It's not wrong to want to die on your own terms, but it would be a shame for you to die so soon. You still have at least three years. There is a lot you can do in that time. Even if your health gets worse, you should try to make the most of your life.

[Brandonthahelper]

There is a cure called "Ozone Therapy." It's not legal in the U.S yet because the FDA hasn't approved. Do some research on it and find treatment centers. But it is risky, but like you said, " I'm ganna die anyways might as well be on my own terms." :D

[Gigablue]

There is a cure called "Ozone Therapy." It's not legal in the U.S yet because the FDA hasn't approved. Do some research on it and find treatment centers. But it is risky, but like you said, " I'm ganna die anyways might as well be on my own terms." :D

The evidence for the safety of ozone therapy is limited, and there is no evidence of efficacy. The FDA won't approve a treatment that hasn't been proven to have any effect and might not even be safe. There was some research into using ozone to treat blood before a transfusion, but even that isn't a approved use of ozone. Don't waste time or money on ozone therapy, it doesn't work and might be harmful.

[SmexiLexie510]

i cannot imagine being in your position right now.. no it is not wrong for you to want that but it is wrong for you to carry anything out. there are people that love you and would miss you, make the most of the time you have left and remember to always stay hopeful, there could be a way <3 here if you need anything honey