Two Guys, One Heartbreak, and Me

[Ale J.]

So, there are two guys I'm dealing with. They are both sweet and funny, and I like both. One guy asked me out (as in bf/gf) yesterday and I said yes but felt immidiately guilty for it. I felt like I shouldn't have said yes and when he started holding my hand I felt like running away and hiding. There was just something bothering me. All of my next class all I could think about was what a horrible decision I made and the other guy was on my mind. The next class was with him and he was being unusually flirty and smiley and I just realized how much I really liked him.

Cutting to the end, his best friend told me he likes me and since he found out he acts different. I hate myself for making that choice and I don't know what to do.

I can't just break up with the first guy...It would ruin our friendship and he could be heartbroken. But I can just continue being with him because I like someone else and It would be wrong. Either way, I'm hurting one of them. I just don't know what to do.

Please help?

[lumos]

Oh, I've been in this situation so many times, but you always have to follow your gut feeling. I've never made the right choice though, because it is easier said than done. However, if you don't follow your gut feeling then you will be the one who's hurt. You just have to face the fact that you don't like the first guy who's now asked you out, you have got to tell him that you don't feel that way towards him. It isn't right to date someone, just because you feel sorry for them, in time they will get even more attached and when the time comes for you to tell them, they will be completely crushed. Therefore, do it now while you can, it will hurt him, but it's not your fault who you have feelings for, we can't control that. If your gut feeling is telling you to go for the second guy, then go for the second guy and be happy, however hard it is, you have to face the reality or you will just end up being hurt. Don't think about it, just do what you think is the right thing to do and what will make you happy.

[FreeFall]

Yes you can break up with him. You don't have to stay with him for your friendship or his feelings, that's not fair to you. You stay with a person because you like them, want to be with them and want to feed the relationship between you two.
You don't deserve to be stuck like that. You're hurting everyone being stuck. You're suffocating yourself, making first guy believe you're with him because you reciprocate his feelings, and second guy because the girl that likes him back isn't the one dating him.

Follow your gut, the gut's hardly wrong. But first and foremost, your happiness comes first. (: