Biromantic Homosexual?!

[Biscuithead13]

Ok so I've struggled with my own sexuality for a long time. I had accepted myself as "gay" and came out to all my friends and some family as such. But, I'm beginning to think I'm not gay. Long story short, I have a friend who unfortunately moved to wisconsin but we've knowneach other almost our whole lives and have gone through alot together and have opened up to each other about alot of things. I'm not sure why, but over the years we've kinda had feelings for each other (and lately she called me cute and she never did that before) and I just have this feeling we kind of like each other. The problem is, I'm not physically attracted to girls, but heres the catch. She's a tomboy and has few curves, something that would appeal to me since the whole reason I dont like boobs is because when they're big and stick out it looks weird. My only sexual attractions are to guys, but this isnt the first time I've had feelings for a girl. I honestly think If I found out she liked me I'd want to see whats there for us, and I wanna kiss her (and I've like never said that about a girl.) One thing though is that we'd look like a gay guy and a lesbian together, but I wouldnt care if we'd be happy. There's also this to think about: http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?p=1852477#post1852477

It's the same friend I have feelings for, and to be honest the idea of a transexual turns me off, so the sex part of me wants her to stay a girl since she has a body type I'd like. But my heart says I want her happy, and if she wanted to be a boy I'm happy if she is. The idea of dating a tranny doesnt appeal to me, but ultimately I want her happy. I'm not sure how far I'd go with her, but I guess you could say I wanna experiment, and if she has feelings for me too then why not? Its a lot to think about, but I guess you could put my general feelings about guys and girls like this it like this:

Romantic Attraction: Guys or Girl
Sexual Attraction: Guys only

I'm kinda thinking, if it turns out she likes me, and since she knows all about what I like in guys even down to penises lol would it not be feasible I can still get my sexual satisfaction by participating in guy on guy activities, especially since I know she's into seeing that sort of thing? Just alot to think about.....am I biromantic or just gay-curious?!

P.S I've dated 1 girl and 2 guys

[OregonStateDude]

Chris, I'm not convinced that you are 100% gay. But it's just a label anyways, and who can really put a label on someone's feelings?

You say you have feelings for your TG friend. Maybe you should ask yourself where exactly does the attraction come from. Is it the person or is it because she is really a he inside and you like that she has all these boyish qualities.

[ExhibitG]

Romantic Attraction: Guys or Girl
Sexual Attraction: Guys only

i'm seriously the exact same way, although i do have a stronger romantic attraction to girls than guys. but in terms of sexual attraction, the vast majority of the time i get turned on by guys only.

i label myself as bisexual for now, but whatever. i'm trying not to really put too much emphasis on the label thing because i like who i like and that's it.

you should try that strategy too. it seems like you are trying way too hard to classify yourself with a definite sexuality when in reality, if you do that, you'll be spending the rest of your life unsure of yourself.

[Biscuithead13]

Hmmm well I like her the person, and I like her boyish qualities....but if it were for sexual purposes I'd actually want her to stay a girl :/ granted i like penis not vaginas but the idea of her having a penis after having something else before actually turns me off.

[Jonathan1998]

I'm the same I get Romantic feelings for girls and boys but sexual feelings for guys only, that makes you bisexual

[Biscuithead13]

Idek know anymore i fucking give up nobody can make me happy :(

[Drew5]

Idek know anymore i fucking give up nobody can make me happy :(

This is true. So give up on others making you happy. No one can make you happy! You control that, so you can make ur self happy and then find some one to be with.

Or be with some one knowing it's ur choice to be happy with or without them.

[randomnessqueen]

youre still homosexual because youre only physically attracted to guys.
and you dont need to call yourself biromantic, you can gain feelings for anyone, its not like their sex or gender will affect their personality. if she were born male, you would still have those feelings for her.
so dont think of things like biromantic, youre just homosexual and you have romantic feeling for someone who happens to be a girl

[Biscuithead13]

youre still homosexual because youre only physically attracted to guys.
and you dont need to call yourself biromantic, you can gain feelings for anyone, its not like their sex or gender will affect their personality. if she were born male, you would still have those feelings for her.
so dont think of things like biromantic, youre just homosexual and you have romantic feeling for someone who happens to be a girl

Ok so I could still date her if she returned the feelings? I'm like really curious about it like I'd wonder how'd we would be together and I cant lie I'd wanna kiss her or experiment or something. I dont wanna ruin the friendship though because I value it most.

[Gordo]

Help me out, I'm a bit thick. You wrote:

Romantic Attraction: Guys or Girl
Sexual Attraction: Guys only

Sexual attraction, this means that you'd only have sex with a guy. That one I get.

Romantic attraction, I'm not sure I get what you mean because someone I have a romantic relationship with, I eventually want to have some kind of sex with. So to me they are linked, but you separate them, so I'm missing something. (not you)

Some people would say emotional attraction, but to me, I have an emotional attraction of some sort with everyone I consider a friend. Anyway, ya got me thinking on your OP, but I'm not gettin this other part which I think is linked.


I believe one way to have a real friendship with someone is to be very open and honest with them, so if it were me, I'd explain to her what you've written here. There's nothing offensive in what you want AND it might give you peace of mind because she could nip the whole thing in the bud if her thoughts are along the lines of "I could never think of you that way".

I guess I'm tryin' to save you some worry in that she wants you as friend, not someone who she date.

I'm still thinkin on this tho

[Biscuithead13]

Help me out, I'm a bit thick. You wrote:

Romantic Attraction: Guys or Girl
Sexual Attraction: Guys only

Sexual attraction, this means that you'd only have sex with a guy. That one I get.

Romantic attraction, I'm not sure I get what you mean because someone I have a romantic relationship with, I eventually want to have some kind of sex with. So to me they are linked, but you separate them, so I'm missing something. (not you)

Some people would say emotional attraction, but to me, I have an emotional attraction of some sort with everyone I consider a friend. Anyway, ya got me thinking on your OP, but I'm not gettin this other part which I think is linked.


I believe one way to have a real friendship with someone is to be very open and honest with them, so if it were me, I'd explain to her what you've written here. There's nothing offensive in what you want AND it might give you peace of mind because she could nip the whole thing in the bud if her thoughts are along the lines of "I could never think of you that way".

I guess I'm tryin' to save you some worry in that she wants you as friend, not someone who she date.

I'm still thinkin on this tho

Well I gotta put it like this then: I DO like her, but not enough to the point I could see myself dating her and being together a long time. I coudlnt be loyal to her in the long run, so I wouldnt waste my time.