This considered Self Harm?

[Desuetude]

I've been wondering for a while if this was considered self harm. Currently I'm on day 20 or something shit like that but the weather has been getting a lot hotter and because of this has triggered my eczema to flare up.

I've had it since I was a kid and I used to itch so much that I would draw blood but I understand that it was nothing do with self harm, I just wanted the stupid itching to go away. Lately though when I start to itch, because I bite my nails, I just find something sharp (usually tweezers) and make do with them. It's doing a lot more damage than nails and I have a bunch of cuts, granted not very deep, just from scratching.

The dilemma I have is I don't know whether I'm using the eczema as an excuse to self harm. The urges are still there and I usually carry on 'scratching' after the itchy feeling is gone. I don't know, maybe it's normal?

[Mortal Coil]

First of all, it is very common for people to disguise self-harm as something more socially acceptable. Lots of boxers and wrestlers, for instance. People who get tattoos and piercings. People who brush their hair so much that it makes their scalps raw.

It really does sound like you are using this as an alternate form of self-harm, and it is good that you recognised it enough to ask about it, because this shows that you are more conscious about it and that you care about recovery. May I take this opportunity to congratulate you on day 20?

Stay strong, Nikki.

[Desuetude]

First of all, it is very common for people to disguise self-harm as something more socially acceptable. Lots of boxers and wrestlers, for instance. People who get tattoos and piercings. People who brush their hair so much that it makes their scalps raw.

It really does sound like you are using this as an alternate form of self-harm, and it is good that you recognised it enough to ask about it, because this shows that you are more conscious about it and that you care about recovery. May I take this opportunity to congratulate you on day 20?

Stay strong, Nikki.
Well, I guess that's a good point. Thing is, there isn't really anything I can do to stop it, the eczema will always be there, I still have the overwhelming urges to itch until I bleed. I don't really care about recovery, you see. I mean, I should, but I really just can't get up the energy to care about myself.

Well, thanks Alex. But if this is considered self harm then I guess I'm back to zero, as I have been for a very long time.

[Magenta]

Technically this could be considered self-harm, yes. I do the same thing with my own skin problems. However, sometimes it's not intentional so I don't count it as day zero. For me, I find that day zero over every little thing is awfully discouraging. It's going to be harder to stop doing that since the eczema will always be there so maybe do what I do: if you cut/burn/scratch intentionally, you start over. That is obviously self-harm. But if you catch yourself itching it until it bleeds or just before that, stop yourself and move on. Don't worry about losing your 20 days.

In my personal opinion, interfering with a pre-existing condition is the lesser of two evils. It's not good but it's a habit like any other. It took me AGES to get over picking at my skin due to having skin issues in general. I'm still not completely over it. But it's a secondary problem in my mind and I prefer to think that I would rather stop the cutting which has landed me in the hospital rather than picking my skin unconsciously which is its own kettle of fish.

But don't use the tweezers and if it stops itching, stop yourself. Don't continue for the sake of continuing because that does sound like another way of releasing the urges to self-harm in a more 'indirect' manner. Sorry if this made no sense. I can relate, I'm just not sure how to explain it.

[Thunduhbuhlt]

Like you said to me about my similar kind of dilemma, I don't think you should count it as self-harm unless it becomes something that you do intentionally to inflict pain on yourself. I think that yeah, you may be doing it as an alternative, but just don't let it get to the point of where you are doing it so much that it's becoming a new problem. Just stay strong, Nikki. :)

[Noxail]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure this counts as Self-Harm. I'm sure you'll get over this. You're stronger than you think you are. :hug: ~Holli

[AnnaAbbey]

First Stay strong !