I feel completely hopless please help me...

[Seeker94]

Ok well I need someone to talk to about this cuz i cant stop thinking I cant even sleep right now but I guess I should start by telling the story...

Well I was a pretty big pot head at one point still kinda am and thats why I got shipped off to austraila with my dad on a summer "vacation" but it was actually to get rid of me. My dad lives here and I basically was sent here for a new start but it ended up coming out that I had to go back to get some stuff redone because they wouldnt let me immigrate because of minor complications. I had my mind set on staying and starting over while I was here but now that Im going back idk what to do. My dad thinks that ill go back and do exactly as I was and tbh I probably will but in saying that he thinks that I can become big one day and make alot of money but in saying that I think I can but Im constantly afraid of failure...afraid of letting everyone down...Ive gotten to the point to where my uncle has washed his hands of me and some how it doesnt bother me at all not in the slightest yet I still love my uncle but why is that I just dont care weather I lose my own family. It makes me cry every time I think about loosing my family but when they say they are done with me it doesnt even make me sad...I just say "oh well people come and go." why am I like this has anyone had this problem...I feel lost and its making me want to cut like I used to its been almost a year since I last did but its just making deppressed that im so numb to the loss....I just...Just dont know what to do please help I dont want to be deppressed again and just want someones advice.....please help :(

[Shark98]

You're not hopeless, everyone has potential, and don't listen to your family, you are worth it, they're just pessimistic. What if you do fail? You're only human, and everyone fails sometime in their life, humans aren't perfect. I personally think it's better to try then to win, since you've done all you could've, and there's no going back. I want you to be all you can be, because there's nothing you can be but you, and if people can't accept you for being you, they should go jump in a lake. Just acknowledge the truth, you will find some joy in your life, and no matter what happens, everything will eventually be okay. So just relax, and be comfortable with the things you can't change, take action with the things you can, and don't be afraid to fail. Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts
-Winston Churchill

[Sleepy Raisin]

First of all, please do not cut yourself thats soo not okay. And you say you want to start over well just do the best you can with what you have, in another year you can leave your family and not have to worry about them. And failure is a wretched thing and will tear you apart, just stop fearing it. Always give your best! Also, when your uncle says that kind of stuff, do NOT just shrug it off! Its the worst way to deal with a problem. Especially a problem like family. Bring it up with your uncle, if he doesnt respond or change, then you have to be the bigger person. You'll have to find a way to deal with him. Bottom line dont give in to horrid habits like cutting yourself or smoking. And dont give up, think positive and not negative!

BTW Shark98 brings up some very good points!

[Alliegator]

I still believe in you and you're not a failure. Please don't start cutting again! It won't do any help and you're only hurting yourself. Is there any one in your family that you can tell exactly what you just posted here? Try talking to your dad!