Openly gay in locker rooms... Awkward?

[ZzKingz]

I wasn't sure whether to post this in puberty 101 or here, but I thought this was more of a sexuality thing.

I came out in February, and until recently, only a random handful of friends, family, and eavesdroppers knew my sexuality. Now pretty much everyone knows because of Facebook (which isn't really an issue). While nobody gets beat up for being gay at my school, homophobia DOES exist, particularly among guys in the locker room. As a high school student who plans to graduate, I need to take a number of PE classes in the next two Yeats, including swimming.

I'm not afraid of getting beat up or ruthlessly harassed for being gay, but I can image its super awkward to be the gay guy in the locker room. Uncomfortable for everyone else, too. I don't know what I'm asking for here. Words of wisdom? Can anyone speak from experience? Opinions from straight guy would be nice, too.

[rocketedd]

Hey I am 14 and swim loads two uys about 18 and 19 swim on the same team. They are both gay one openly - the other just to friends family. So my advice is gay or not - pick your friends and just get on with it. Maybe I am the only guy in the world who does not bother about showers or changing with gay guys but I really dont think so. This is just my opinion - not meaning to be mean or that no way - but I think sometimes gay guys make issues out of nothing really and them being gay.

[Sean4U]

Unless you're planning on hitting on the guys----and I know that isn't what you will be doing----just go about it as normal.....I'm out and have been since I was 14 in Junior High and have never found this to be a problem....it may be at first, as other wondering what you're going to do, but if you just act natural....and as ED said above, just hang with your friends that you know it may be more uncomfortable for you than them....don't make an issue of it and things will be fine, especially if , as you said, you don't think that you'll be harassed or beat up...if that happens then the school should deal with that....

[rocketedd]

Thanks Sean4u good wen someone agrees sorry i dont have enough posts to message you

[Iron Man]

I highly doubt you will be walking up to guys and groping them, etc. Ergo, it is only awkward if you or anyone else make it awkward.

[CrossingtheCourtyard]

Either just go in, get changed and keep to yourself or change in bathroom stalls or something?

Honestly if other's are going to make jokes or feel self conscious that you are checking them out or something, it's their problem. If it does become a problem for you, talk to one of the instructors/coaches. It is their responsibility to prevent homophobic harassment in gym class areas.

[OregonStateDude]

Well, I'm only out to one person, my best friend. But here's how I handle the locker room.

If I'm naked and I'm talking to someone else who's naked, I make sure to maintain eye contact. It's the polite thing to do anyways, but it would be a dead giveaway if I stared at another boy's cock for too long.

My advice would be to act as straight as you can, that's what I do. Talk about girls, monster truck rallys, and other macho shit that boys talk about. Don't get me wrong, I still check out the boys, I just try not to be obvious about it.

[LatinaVivit]

Just act normally and show them that you're no different from them. They'll eventrually get that you aren't there to molest them.

[sweaterboi]

Well, I'm only out to one person, my best friend. But here's how I handle the locker room.

If I'm naked and I'm talking to someone else who's naked, I make sure to maintain eye contact. It's the polite thing to do anyways, but it would be a dead giveaway if I stared at another boy's cock for too long.

My advice would be to act as straight as you can, that's what I do. Talk about girls, monster truck rallys, and other macho shit that boys talk about. Don't get me wrong, I still check out the boys, I just try not to be obvious about it.

I agree with Peter, be chill and act normally and no one will care.

[KenBoy6]

Pick your friends wisely

[devinity]

avoid gitting a erction (especially nude:eek:) dont stare and you will be fine

and peateralixander what whuld happen if thay saw you peeking a look:peek:

[Jonathan1998]

Be yourself towards and try getting to know them, don't check them out while you're all naked it's best advised. like one said in here also act straight as you can

[Meh Guy]

Man, don't worry about it. They may be fairly uncomfortable at first, but if not going around and giving people bj's left right and center in the changeroom, they'll grow to you. I have three gay teammates on a wrestling team, now tight uniforms are particullarly unforgiving, but no one pays attetion, because we are all guys and we've been teammates long enough to know they won't try stuff.

Hope it helped:D

[GaryKTM250]

I wasn't sure whether to post this in puberty 101 or here, but I thought this was more of a sexuality thing.

I came out in February, and until recently, only a random handful of friends, family, and eavesdroppers knew my sexuality. Now pretty much everyone knows because of Facebook (which isn't really an issue). While nobody gets beat up for being gay at my school, homophobia DOES exist, particularly among guys in the locker room. As a high school student who plans to graduate, I need to take a number of PE classes in the next two Yeats, including swimming.

I'm not afraid of getting beat up or ruthlessly harassed for being gay, but I can image its super awkward to be the gay guy in the locker room. Uncomfortable for everyone else, too. I don't know what I'm asking for here. Words of wisdom? Can anyone speak from experience? Opinions from straight guy would be nice, too.


I'm straight and would rather have a gay mate who is out than some of the self thought egos who put on the macho. I hope all goes well for you, yes for sure there will be some prat but hopefully you will have friends real friends who will ok with everything. God how I wish we could all just be as we want. sorry I do not have any advice to offer.

[UnknownBoi98]

I Don't Have To get Changed In my Locker Room . .

[jojorob]

it`s gonna be rough all i can say

[Sleepy Raisin]

In my opinion, as a straight guy, I wouldnt care if there was gay guy in the locker rooms its only for a minute or two, and if your nervous about it then change quickly and get the hell outta there!

Just as long as your not one to wear make-up and all that girly stuff i think youre okay

[Brice]

If you think it will be awkward, than only you and the other guys can make it awkward. It will most likely be the other guys though, in your case. Just go in, change quickly, and get out.

[horizonlooker]

Don't make it awkward. Trust me. I'm not in the exact same situation, but it's somewhat similar. Just pretend that nothings different than it has ever been. If you're not checking them out (which may or may not be a good idea) then who cares?

[Haleyzmont]

Dont worry, its not as awkward as you may think for the other guys. I know in experiances. I was openly lesbian in my school, everyone knew and i also though the other people would always shy away in the corners and try to cover up from me but that wasnt the case at all! Everyone was all cool amd they were even chatting with me and everyone else while changing but that also may be because my school is very supportive of gays. But dont worry too muh.

[Machinegun]

If you want my advice I will say you shouldn't tell them about your sexuality..and try to not get nervious things gonna be ok

[TigerBoy]

I've been out for years so at school you get the odd d**khead who makes a big thing about hiding in the corner, but honestly I've even had some guys making a joke about putting on a show for me to show they were cool with it (which was v. cool :P ) which broke the ice. Last year or so, no real issues for anyone.

Awkward and uncomfortable you say .... I suppose mainly we're talking unwanted erections which happens to me sometimes (school, gym and swimming here) if there's a cute guy. Its worse for me at swimming because i'm always intimidated by the older guys at my club and kind of worried about pervs getting the wrong idea. Not really a problem now for me at school - had some shit for it when I was 13/14 but then so did any boy in that situation and I wasn't alone, but everyones kind of chilled about all that stuff now. One thing I have used is "what you doing looking at my cock?" line when a boy started on me which made it into a joke.

My advice:
keep a towel handy if you need to cover yourself (hides it better if you just hold it in front rather than wear it).
Most guys won't (shouldn't) be looking anyway (and you can call them out about why they are, ideally in a funny way).
if a school / organisation has a anti-bullying / anti-homophobia policy (which they should) find out what it is so you can quote it if you aren't being supported. If staff don't protect you, they may be breaking the law or at the very least not doing their jobs. I've good experience with this area if you need advice ;-)

[leroy68kilos]

I'm straight, and there are a couple of gay guys on the swim team, and another in the PE class. They're open, and we have showers together. Who cares if they want to look? I've noticed them having an eyeful of my cock and arse, but what harm does it do me? It's not intended to disrespect me.
Looking is OK, touching isn't.

[Extreme586]

Well nobody knows I'm gay when I had to take P.E. for the last few years. But I did get caught looking at someone once, and my current crush a few times but hey I caught him looking too so I didn't feel too bad the second time ;). The first time I got caught, the guy asked one of my close friends if I was gay but she told him she didn't think so, so w/e.

And swimming dude... some of the best few weeks in P.E. fucking EVER! Especially my second year, holy shit everyone took their shorts off...showering! Best fucking year ever ever ever. All I can say is, being the known gay guy is going to make it harder on you. As long as you keep to yourself, and do what you need to do, nobody will give you shit. If any one has a problem with you, outright tell them your not attracted to them.

The funny thing is most guys are insecure about taking their clothes off, so as the gay guy your gonna be watched closely (yes backwards indeed lol). They don't realize gays *shocker* have preference too. Also if your gonna look, try and be discrete about it. Every now and then your gonna get caught but hey, it happens, and yes it's worth it haha.

@TigerBoy - About the unwanted occasional boner comment...so fucking truuuue lol!! The towel handy thing is also a life saver although I did get caught one time before I could bring it up leaving the shower, it got caught on my hard on as I was bringing it around. Every time I think about it I start cracking up, luckily it was only me and my current crush, you know the one who I caught looking and got caught looking at before. Lucky, lucky me lol :)

[Thomas01]

It might be a bit awkward at first but once you meet people who get to know you well, an know you would never do anything that they wouldn't like then I'm sure they will be comfortable around.

I'm gay an though I don't have PE, I have marching abdn and all the guys change in one room. At first it was a bit awkward changing since I thought the otters would think I was staring at them. But the guys already knew I wouldn't do anything to hurt our friendship an they also knew me well enough that they felt comfortable changing right next to me.

Just keep a conversation going and I'm sure people will think you are not looking at them. Also if you are really close to your friends they might just joke around about stuff. Like in my case sometimes the guys flex in front of me and I just play along as if I was interested. Joking around about it not too much but somewhat will help know which friends are comfortable around you an which ones aren't

[james wolf]

You've got to remember, they won't be thinking about your sexuality all the time, so just act normal. If they see you in the corner facing the wall, they'll pick up on you, but if you're just changing like everyone else, it will probably pass over their heads.

[Collin97]

Be yourself!;) thats the most important thing;)

[Jamie1515]

Don't Sweat dude, just act normal and you should be fine. As said above just be yourself.