I just don't know what to do..

[NZLD]

This has been an on and off thing for over a year now but lately it has gotten allot worse...
When I'm alone i feel really depressed, I convince my self i have some disease and get really anxious about it. When ever i think of school and studying, and the pressure i have to do well it just makes me feel like crawling into a hole. I barely see any day light, I go to bed at 6am and wake up at 4 or 5. my hygiene is virtually gone, i always think about family members dying and that scares me as well. I'm always down and at home i go through almost a 1.5L bottle of diet coke a day. I don't know why i act and feel like this but i just do. My moods vary from happy and silly to egocentric and arrogant to deeply depressed and upset. But its mostly the depressed part. I see a councillor at school but it doesn't seem to do anything.. I just feel gross like my life is burning away everyone else is happy and living life.

[NZLD]

anyone..?

[Noirtier]

Well, it is very clear that you have depression to me--whether it is situational or clinical, I do not know, as I am not a doctor. However, I would recommend talking to a doctor about it and seeing if there is a possibility you could have clinical depression and if it might be a good idea for the doctor to write you a prescription (I would go to a family doctor first, and if he seems to agree with you, he should recommend a psychiatrist). That is what happened when I was diagnosed, and they wrote me a prescription for Cymbalta. It has helped a lot, and for me kicked in in a few days, although it may be different for different people. I definitely know how you feel, it's a lot similar to how I felt before I was diagnosed. Like I said, I would certainly recommend seeing a doctor and finding out what they would suggest. I hope I helped! And I'm always here if you need to talk!