I've become showy about it?

[Iphis]

That's a bit of a lie, but it's sort of the gist of what I'm doing.

I used to cut mindlessly, because I needed to and because it felt good to look as bad on the outside as I felt on the inside. But now I want people to see my scars. I feel invalidated again, and I feel like the only way to bring back my self-confidence is to show other people, in the most obvious way, that I feel like a loser.

Am I just cutting for attention?
It's still a need- a raw, burning need that I'm driven to fulfill every time it becomes overwhelming, and I do, whether or not I show other people. But now I want people to see it.
I'm telling myself it's my subconscious trying to reach out for help, but I know I don't want any. At least, I think I don't.

What am I even doing?

[Klaudiax]

I used to hide my scars for few years but then I decided to show them because I just don't care anymore. The worst thing about it is people looking at them and asking questions. There is no cutting for ''attention'' self harm, is self harm. You decide whether you want or don't want to show your scars.