Bestfriend's sister

[Alan F.]

Ok guys, I'm sorry for the long post, but this is kinda complicated. I think I like my best friend's sister. I am fat, unattractive, and shy. With that being said, I figure she will never feel the same about me. I never thought that I would feel this way about her, but it has happened. The only reason I have only now felt like this(I've known her for 2 years) is because I've moved in with my best friend's family. Before moving in, I always imagined my perfect girl as someone I could feel secure around, but also have a good time. She is that kind of person, but she also acts like a guy sometimes. Before moving in, I felt awkward around any girl, but I feel comfortable around her and I think she feels kind of comfortable around me. I don't want to ruin our friendship that we have as of now, but I can't help but feel the yearning of wanting to ask her out. She also has been 100% cool with me staying here, and we have messed around and had fun(just random fun). Please help me. My best friend is someone that I can trust, but he is also very protective. Also, another one of his bestfriends have dated her before. Finally, her parents would not approve considering I live with her. Once again, sorry for the long post, but I would like any input at all. Thank you for your future help.

EDIT[Me, her, and my bestfriend all have a little pact to always stick together and not to tattle. I'm so scared of losing that trust. I also would hate to lose the closeness we have, she is the first girl I've ever felt even kinda comfortable around.
Ages:Me: 17, Bestfriend: 16, Her: 14.]

EDIT2[I have also never dated in my life.]

[RCT109]

Well ask your bestfriend as to what he thinks and if he says go for it
then do just that

[Alan F.]

i see where you coming from, but I'm terribly scared of asking him.

[RCT109]

You live with them and just think how pissed he would be if he found out post facto of u being with her and not telling him

maybe he sees you as a bro and doesnt want you dating her or maybe hes cool with it cuz he knows you wont hurt her

but even if you're scared you should at least tell him you like his sis

[Alan F.]

Thank you roby, I agree with the whole telling him after the fact thing, but I'm still scared that if he's cool with it, she would still say no, and then it would always be awkward around her.

[RCT109]

Thats the price every man pays

personal story:
I asked a girl out in my 日本語 class and she said no. Now next year we will have the same class and maybe another one. So it is awkward between us still and its been a month.
The reason being is that She feels the same about me but wants to concentrate on school work

-End-

So all in all a NO is not bad it meens she sees you as a brother most likely

[Alan F.]

C'mon guys, I need some more input please.

[unnamed94]

try to find out if she at least feels attracted to you in some way other than friends before talking to you friend, because it could be awkward

[Aves]

I'd say bad idea. First of all, you're living with her. In no way is this going to end out well. The relationship, sorry to say, would most likely fail if it were to even start. After it fails imagine how awkward it would be not only around her, but around the entire family. Another thing, it'd be awkward for everyone in the house. I wouldn't be surprised if her dad kicked you out of the house. The big problem is that there's little way to prevent you two from sneaking around in the night.

Two, she's your best friend's sister. That's just awkward if you ask me.

All in all, it would be the most awkward relationship for everyone in that household. You could highly upset the parents with even thinking such things, let alone acting on them. They have done a lot for you it seems. Taking in a person is not an easy task, it makes bills much higher and it is also letting an extra danger into their house. You could be highly disrespectful in this matter, and I see no good to come from it.

Don't do it.

P.S. She's 14, you're 17. If she were 16 or 15, I'd have less of a problem with the age, but dude, it's barely right for you to want to date someone that young.

[Alan F.]

I finally came to the conclusion not to pursue it, but I did tell her how I felt. I have finally figured out why I liked her though, I need someone's shoulder to cry on, someone to tell me everything is okay. I'm missing my dog and I need a replacement. I've been having terrible depression, and I just need someone I can trust. As for liking her, I don't anymore. I don't even know if I'll like her as a friend anymore after this, she acted like the freshman she is, instead of the mature person that I see in her. I just have to talk to her about it. And Gunter, I know it sounds odd, but she acted like she was my age, and just made me comfortable around her. I always thought that it would be weird for me to date anyone in a grade below me, but things changed with her.

The only reason why I told her is because I'm terribly shy and I'm getting tired of hiding everything, In this instance, I trusted her to be mature about it, but she wasn't, in which makes me feel like shit because I don't trust most people, so her reaction was a blow to the gut, and now I don't even know if our relationship will live...

[RCT109]

Alan,
Trust me it will live
I mean you probably caught her off guard and thats the way she reacted.
I my self do that too. I am 17 and quite mature and sometimes i revert back

[Alan F.]

Thank you Roby for being there for me throughout this whole mess. The good news is that things are seeming to get more normal, but only time will tell if things will ever get totally normal.

[RCT109]

No problem
and you are right only time will tell but just be your self through it all and it will work out

[Alan F.]

Quick update, thing are actually going pretty well and there is only a trace bit of lingering awkwardness that I notice.

[RCT109]

well that might stay for a while but that will definitly be good once it does go away

[Anyone51]

This goes against The Bro Code therefore you must not. If she doesn't like you like that there will be regular awkwardness when at their house when you visit and if you do go out and if it doesn't work out/ends badly you probably will lose your friend too

[RCT109]

This goes against The Bro Code therefore you must not. If she doesn't like you like that there will be regular awkwardness when at their house when you visit and if you do go out and if it doesn't work out/ends badly you probably will lose your friend too

Actually if you have a bro's permission then its ok that the one rule of the code
Bros before Hoes and if you ask a bro you still put him first

[Alan F.]

Tensions were sadly awkward, but the other day I went off on her. A couple days later, she finally told me why she was avoiding me nd everything, she said she considered me a bro.

[FreeFall]

I had a feeling that was it as I was reading your journey. You're her big brother's best friend, and you moved in. You're the figure for the second big brother now. Hopefully you two can mend the friendship, if not, welcome to what is the big bro lil sis battles.

[Tanleggedjuliet]

If he is really your best friend he would want you happy and show him and his parents what a great guy you can be

[Alan F.]

I had a feeling that was it as I was reading your journey. You're her big brother's best friend, and you moved in. You're the figure for the second big brother now. Hopefully you two can mend the friendship, if not, welcome to what is the big bro lil sis battles.

You ma'am, are very smart.

[Ginganinja]

ask your best friend how he feels about that. but also the age difference is a little far you will be 18 soon and then its weird no offence. but also dont be so hard on your self im sure your not fat and ugly like you say you are