Noxail
May 30th, 2012, 09:17 PM
I can't stand myself. I feel ugly. I feel dirty. And I just can't take it anymore. I'm starving to death, I haven't eaten properly in weeks, and what I eat, I vomit back up, I don't even have to purge like normal. I just feel cleaner hungry. I wan't to bleed myself out, and never wake up. I'm stressing over stupid things, and I'm going into more panic attacks than normal. My heart rate is through the roof and my blood sugar's way low. I feel like I'm going to give out if I stand up, and I'm shaking. The only good thing is the pounds are dropping like nobody's business. I've gone from 135 to 120 in three weeks, not the best rate for someone healthy, but then again I'm not healthy. I really need to talk to my boyfriend but he's not picking up, so I guess I'll grab a beer and try an calm myself down... Just wanted to get this out there... :rolleyes: ~Holli