suicide or not

[dolls]

im very suicidal but i cant commit suicide because of my mom. i dont want to just leave her, i dont want her to cry. but i really want to die, ive wanted to die for almost 3 years. i think about it every day. and sure im only 14 but i know what i want. life just really isnt fun, its never been for me. + i have ocd, anxiety, diabetes,ocpd and severly depression. So, how am i supossed to die when i cant leave my mom? And, it is legal to sort of commit suicide right? Cant i like talk to my mother about it and then do it like 'peacefully'?

thanks

[Sapphire]

No one here is going to give you tips on how to kill yourself.

Even with all your collection of diagnoses life can and will improve.
When I was your age I couldn't remember the last time I smiled and thought that I would never smile again. 4 years down the line and I can smile. I do see the good in life. Ok, I get really low still, but I am able to embrace those good moments.
My advice is hang on in there and get some help with dealing with some of the shit in your life.

Feel free to pm me if you want to chat

[Ironic Infidel In England]

I've also got a shitload of diagnoses (sp). It sucks. I've wanted to, and tried to, kill my self several times. Believe me, every time I have woken up, I have been glad I failed. Because I realised things would start to get better. I hope the same can happen for you, without the suicide attempts.

Feel free to PM me too.

[dolls]

I didnt ask for any tips on how to kill myself, i just wanted to know if theres a way to die when-you-want-to-die way..um, like to commit suicide but everyone knows about it..?

[Sapphire]

Dolls, we are not going to give you ideas for how to commit suicide and ease everyone's pain at your passing.

What is going on for you at the moment?
We are more than happy to help and support you through your issues.

[dolls]

Well, nothing is really going on in my life. the last couple of days my ocd and anxiety has been Very bad. i hardly eat because of it. so then i just get more tired than i already am. can you Really 'recover' from ocd and anxiety?

[Ironic Infidel In England]

Yes. It is perfectely possible to recover from ocd and anxiety, especially if you get therapy and/or medication, so I suggest trying them.

[Sapphire]

What has caused your lack of eating?
Yes, you can recover from OCD and anxiety.
OCD can be helped dramatically by CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) and this is complimented with drug therapy (though not always needed). Anxiety can also be treated effectively with therapy.

[dolls]

well, i guess first of all i just dont care..like nothing is really important. but then im so worried about germs and such. and there is millions of thoughts running through my head about like where does the food come from, did the making of it destroy our environment and like well you know..ha, i cant really express myself good. im sorry about that. and cant you recover all by your own, i hate talking about like feelings and all that with others.
ps. i do eat some, im diabetic so i have to.he

[Sapphire]

It takes a hell of a lot of will power to overcome it on your own as you have to change some of the ways you think about things. The best and most effective way to deal with it is to have some outside help.

[dolls]

oh. when i go out in public(grocery store, beach etc) i feel really weird. i breath strange, like really fast - as you would if you were scared or something. and then it feels like EVERYBODY is watching me - even like you know the cameras and that they are laughing at me. and i sort of turn into a tomatoe in the face, and i start to sweat. and sometimes i cant even talk! my body feels pretty weird as well, but i cant really explain that..Anyways, im wondering what this is? has it anything to do with anxiety?

okay thank you..i will try to beat it

[Sapphire]

Could be social anxiety or paranoia.
Can you talk with your GP about any of this?

[dolls]

but also, my sister is like depressed and she tried to commit suicide in 05 or 06. and her arms are full of her 'cuttings'. and shes been seeing a therapist for over a year, and she isnt better so i mean, the odds for me arent that good you know..

what is GP?

[Sapphire]

Please don't double post. Use the "Edit" feature.

GP stands for general practioner and is used here in England. When you go to the doctors for a sore throat or something the doc you see is the type I am talking about. If you go see your doctor could you speak with him about it?

No one said it would be quick or easy. Also you have to remember that you are not yout sister. Her issues are most probably different from your own and therefore you will both need help on different things. Therapy helps so many people. I have, and still am, benefiting from therapy for various things. Just because she doesn't seem to be improving doesn't mean you won't.

[dolls]

okay thank you. well i guess i could talk about it with him.

sorry but i dont understand what you mean with double posting..

[Serenity]

sorry but i dont understand what you mean with double posting..

Double posting is when you post twice in a row on the same thread

[dolls]

oh, i just got very very suicidal again. i was just beginning to calm down a bit!

do you have like a tip for me to remember when i get so very much suicidal? like something that wont make me jump out of my f* window..?


yes, i get it know(doube posting)! oh, thank you em09 :)

[Serenity]

Find something or someone worth living for, and hold onto it. Whether it be music, family, friends, anything you love deeply. Remind yourself of the things that make life worth living.

I know it's easier said than done but try it. It's how I make it through each day a lot of the time :daisy:

[dolls]

okay. but i really cant do that..i just cant. i dont work like that or something. but thank you!

[Sapphire]

Talking with friends helps. So meet up with someone or chat on msn or come on here like you have today. It helps remind yourself that people do care and want you about, while also occupying you for a bit.

Playing the 5-minute game helps me and a lot of other people with many self destructive things like suicidal urges and cutting. What you do is you say to yourself "I won't kill myself now, I'll do it in 5 minutes" so you have to find something to do to fill those 5 minutes you have just given yourself. Then when 5 mins are up you say it to yourself again. Just carry on with this untill you have distracted yourself sufficently.

[dolls]

haha, to be honest i dont really have any friends..but the 5 minute game seems to be good. thanks you ;P

[Sapphire]

I'm glad that we have been of some help already.
You can make friends online here. We'll be here for you to rant and rave and to offload. Also to have a bit of light hearted chat.

[Crazysam]

Ive got OCD, Dyslecia, I am thickest in the class at school, I have no friends I spend most days crying and being severely depressed i am also 14 and i havent hit puberty which also bugs me i also get bullied and frankly i would love to die if i could just leave the world that would be brilliant. BUT THINK ABOUT IT THINK ABOUT YOUR MOTHER IT WOULD DESTROY HER PLEASE DONT DO IT! btw have u got msn i would like to talk to you seeing as we are both in a similar situation...