Meds/Docs/Rehab?

[ChaseThisLight]

I've really hurt my self this week. Beating my self has always been a part of my life. But after a black eye, very swollen jaw and a broken thumb; this is the worst I have ever been. I could hardly walk earlier I'd hit my self so much.

How are peoples experiences with seeing shrinks/ gp's about the problems which you have?

Do the meds take away that deep self loathing?

Has anyone tried rehab?

Am I just ridiculous?

Thanks VT.

[Carly011]

Therapy has really helped me. The first thing she told me when i saw her was "i am going to believe in you until you can believe in yourself. I am going to be here through it all and i wont leave you no matter what you do" It helped just knowing i had someone to turn to. She helps me work through my problems and she is helping me get over my self hate.

The meds do NOT take away those self loathing feeling. But it does make you feel better so you can start learning how to like yourself

You are not being ridiculous!! We are here to support you :)

[ChaseThisLight]

I just don't understand my self anymore.

I am so much stronger about financial/work/study issues.

But whenever I have a verbal confrontation with somebody; however small the issue; my head starts to feel like its swelling up from the inside. And then I just can not get my words out or know how to handle the situation.

Then I retreat; and beat on my self. Because I'm inadequate. Because my mind allows people to walk all over me. Because people never understand. BEACAUSE I CAN'T EVEN get my words out. :'(

[Carly011]

I know that feeling. You hit yourself to deal with it, i cut myself to deal with it. Its so hard to understand. But its like you are afraid to get those words out, why if they dont understand it? what if they judge you? at least thats how i feel. Then i also feel like any argument is my fault. That i did something wrong and i am upsetting everyone. And then i start to hate myself even more :/

you are NOT inadequate. Its hard, i know. You want to say what your thinking but you just cant get your words out. Like there is something physically blocking you. Maybe start trying to write what you are feeling down, that way you are at least getting them out.

[ChaseThisLight]

its just so hard. no matter how stupid the issue; other people just run over me because i don't know what to say. so i make it worse. then i make my self feel worse by blaming me for their issue- when it was my issue wit something else of theirs in the first place. URG. Its nice to know there are other people out there!

[Carly011]

I know its hard :( but together we CAN get through this. Just try to remember its not your fault that others have problems :) You can do this, one day you will learn how to voice your thoughts it just takes time to learn how to do that again

[Comatose]

You aren't ridiculous, medication itself will NOT take away the self-loathing, not at all... But a combination of a shrink, medication and potentially rehab will help you. It won't be over night, it won't take a week, or a month, or even a few months... It may take longer than that, esp with getting comfortable with the shrink and getting medication changed/adjusted to suit your body/needs etc... you just have to work through it, with the combination of shrink and medication, and you will improve.